Would you consider this cheating?

I agree with cuteangelfan... if he were to hold that womans hand in front of his wife and she'd flip out, then its def unacceptable behavior... but every couple and every person is different and defines it differently. for example: my fh and i have the same group of friends. some of the guys ive known forever and if i give them a huge hug or a quick kiss on the cheek he doesnt care at all. or even if i give a girlfriend a peck on the lips. and same visaversa. but alot of people would consider that cheating. depends on everyone involved

IT"S CHEATING!!!!

Well if they had sex then its cheating but they were just holding hands and just flirting its not cheating its wrong and stuiped but no making out and no sex not cheating just being stupied

Drinking. drunk..theres your answer.

I think cuteangelfan is right. I think there are different levels of cheating and this qualifies as one of them. I would never do something with a guy I wouldnt do if my husband were around. Perfect example is the shoulder rub, I give my old roomie and husbands best friend shoulder rubs all the time, but I would never give my co-worker a shoulder rub. I love to dance and will dance with guys and girls, but if one gets a bit to frisky I cut it off. My husband doest dance at all and has been to partys where I have been dancing up a storm, and only got mad when one guy wouldnt take the hint that I didnt want to get as "close" as he did. But, my hubby let me take care of it and just watched in case I needed any help. Needless to say that guy was not invited back to the next party (I love all my guy friends. Soooo protective)

Cheating..No. 100% unacceptable ...DEFINITELY!

If you even thought to ask, it probably is! Unexcusable & I'd never tolerate it!

I have to agree, it's cheating, I consider emotional and physcial cheating the same thing..Cheating.

It's cheatin because there was a boundary line that was crossed. Any man in his RIGHT mind knows what the hell he is doing to one when he's married. He had to think up what he was going to do, just like a cheater. So yes, it's a certain type of cheating and yes it's a big deal.

No it may not be cheating in the way a lot of us perceive cheating but at the same time. You know if their significant other was there they would not be doing that. So in a sense it is cheating. And no matter what form it is whether emotional or physical both are wrong and both end up hurting the other person.

@ DCT- i know, alot of women dont want to hear it or will deny it. its sad but i think even if they wont believe they need to be told.

@cuteangelfan- i agree. at first i wasnt sure because i wasnt thinking clearly but your so right.

if you wouldnt behave this way infront of your spouse, you shouldnt behave this way when they are not there.

what would they think if that saw you?

do you feel guilty about what you did? are you able to tell your spouse like its not big deal? i think answering some of these questions with regards to your actions can better explain if your cheating or not.

I think it is cheating! Its absolutely wrong and horrible!

I like the cheat test rule above for sure. I do agree that it's more about what would be acceptable to the wife. Maybe even if you did tell her she'd say "Oh, that's my Mike, such a flirt!"

A big clue to the story is that he DIDN'T do more than hold hands. And from the sounds of your conversation with your BM the next day, she seemed to like him. If he was a bad guy, he probably would have tried to go further. Guys don't really get off on holding hands with with a stranger that they'll probably never see again. I think you should stick to your "I don't know who to believe" theory. He might be a good guy that just walked an annoying drunk girl home. (not saying your friend is annoying, but you know what I mean...) If this was more than holding hands, I'd say there might be a problem, but there just might be more to the story than you know.

I would be on the fence about it being cheating or not but it would for sure show that there is a problem in there relationship. drunk or not he shouldnt want to hold someone elses hand only his wifes. its a way to show affetion.when married thats for one person only.

I would difinately be pissed off! i would be very jelous but if he didn't do anything with her (sex kiss whatever) i guess it's not really cheating, but it would still feel like it to me. hell i get pissed off when my fh's one friend... female btw calls him at 3:30 - 4:00 in the morning!! which is NOT acceptable!!! > GRRRR!!! BAD FRIEND THAT IS A GIRL!!!

Well cheating has so many various definitions attached to it. It would depend on how "open" he and his wife's relationship is.... in my opinion it's cheating 100% and I would be a wreak if my FH were to do that. Cheating can happen on so many levels including an emotional level and the fact that he was showing so much interest in another girl is just so hurtful. Like Future Mrs. Gamble says above... technically it's NOT cheating... but it would sure feel like it and if it feels like it then I'd say it's just as serious as the real thing. Awww, I feel so bad for his wifey.