What are your 'pet peeves' (wedding related)?

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OH YES I didn't even think of this! My fiancé has been in two weddings where he brought me as a date, and I've had to sit with completely random (and in my case, unfriendly) people that I'd never seen or met. One of these were out of town, and I had to find things to do alone throughout the day while they were getting ready, and then arrive to a wedding alone and don't even see my fiancé until the reception. That is actually extremely annoying and awkward.

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LOL!! So smart from them!

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Yep. Everyone faces this.

Frankly you can hire security as a way to handle this situation if you say no but these univited people still show up.

Completely open seating, like not even being assigned a table!

Also agree that head tables suck - I was absolutely MISERABLE sitting at a head table and I didn't even have a date that I was separated from (introvert problems haha).

1. Destination bachelorettes longer than two nights
2. When people think they own a month/year/time period for their wedding. My best friend got super mad one of her friends got engaged a month after her and planned her wedding to land two months before. Absolutely ridiculous!

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This is the majority of my list!!! I would also add

- gaps. They are rude, period.

I also hate #2. My cousin got engaged after and married one month before another cousin, and they don't speak anymore because of it. My cousin said she wanted her own "season" and literally blew up the family over it.

Second the head-table hate! Do a sweetheart table and call it a day!

If anyone else is on the FB wedding resale/swap groups, I hate when every other person is 'looking for (insert vendor) that won't cost an arm and a leg!' the saying rubs me the wrong way. If you have a budget, post that so people who are out of your range won't reach out!

Also hate when people get married in a courthouse and then do another ceremony/reception and keep calling the vow renewal 'my real wedding'. To me it devalues everyone who's ever gotten married in a courthouse and is hella rude.

View Quoted Comment Yes to all of these, but especially to the vendor one. I really don't like when people bash vendors as greedy wedding industry sell-outs. I'm sure some are, but most are passionate about their craft and are fairly pricing their services. $50 a head for a 3 course meal is not a rip off! $3k for 8 hours of photography work and countless hours of pre-and-post production is totally fair! This is what events cost, and it's not the vendors being bad peope

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Yes! As someone who worked in the industry for years it still makes me so upset when I see that.

As a bride I know I've already sent more communication to my venue than what a different type of client would send. And there's a higher expectation of getting it especially perfect because you only get to do this once.

Yes, weddings are charged at a premium, but it's going to be the most photographed day of your life, and brides have such high expectations that the vendors really have to take the service up to the next level. If they're not producing next level service, the pricing doesn't make sense, but like you said that's a handful of vendors and certainly not the norm.

When people don't RSVP!!! I get that things are different this year with COVID but nothing is going to change so dramatically from when I sent the invitations to when your response was due that could possibly change your mind if you're on the fence. It just annoys me to no end that I have to chase people down to confirm they're not coming to the wedding.

I really don't have any pet peeves. There are things I wouldn't want at my wedding or wedding activities, but I've been in five weddings and I thought all of them were great in their own way!

I noticed some people complaining about bachelorette parties. I've been in multiple weekend long parties and think they are awesome! I have 12 girls going to mine & ALL of them are excited for a weekend getaway (a couple of them are moms and are excited for girl time!) I feel like this question can make you second guess your own wedding... do whatever you and your SO want! That's who it is about ❤️

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Agree so much with this!! Your wedding and all of the activities leading up to it are up to you! These forums are so helpful with things, but a lot of times they can turn into people telling you the right or wrong way to do your wedding - which doesn't exist. Do what makes you happy! What works for you, may not work for the next person, and that's more than okay.

Large gaps in between ceremony and reception - because it makes me think what am i gonna be doing in between...? it makes me feel like i'd rather go to one rather than both

View Quoted Comment “Your wedding stops being all about you when you decide to invite guests”
YES! I have never heard it put this way, but this is spot on! I absolutely cringe every time I hear the phrase “my day, my way”. I don’t understand where some brides have adopted the mentality that their wedding means they get to treat people like crap.

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Agree with #1. Haven't personally seen #2.

Unless ALL the people involved are in the same friend group and agree to the time and expenses involved, it's painful to spend that much time in close quarters with strangers

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Agree with these.

Also honeymoon funds

Doing whatever you want and not caring that it's rude.

Mentioning/dictating dress code and other things that assume guests have never attended an event in their lives and can't be trusted as adults to know what is going on.

Vow renewals called "the real wedding" which is disrespectful to those not wanting something big

Asking people to be your friendors instead of hiring professionals

Assuming that everyone want the same extras because it's a wedding and zero room for individuality/creativity. Not all of us are into champagne, we don't want toasts, and the list goes on.

I have a few:


1) Bouquet & garter, & being told I have to participate (prior to being engaged but in a long term relationship). I find both to be unpleasant at best.2) The intense gendering of weddings, everything from expectations about who pays to wedding party terms to the pronouns/language on vendor websites. For the vendors, I full on decided against a few based on how they handled pronouns.3) The divide between what parents expect/did & think is correct/polite versus what I do & where times have changed (parents: cash bar, real flowers, live band, wedding shower, matching wedding party, levels of formality, photographer quality).

1. Brides who are willing to throw away friendships because their bridesmaids are acting like/doing exactly what they want.
2. Couples who think plus ones apply to significant others.
3. Couples who dictate which relationships are deserving enough to invite a significant other based on an arbitrary timeline. 4. Anything that has to do with the wedding that does not take the bridal party's time a d budget into consideration

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I’m curious – with regard to items 2+3, who do you think should get a plus 1 then? I ask because I have a friend who has only started seeing someone recently and I am about to order invitations (very early) as our supplier has a fantastic sale that is too good to miss. Our wedding won’t be until the end of the year and I’m not planning to give this friend a +1.