Wedding "norms" in your area

I agree with Ray Ray. Something depend on your age too. An open bar would kill our budget!

Alisa, great point too! I totally agree.

I agree with Ray Ray – I think in addition to location the couple’s age also has a strong influence on the “normality’s” of the wedding day.

I’m from Southern California, but not LA, think beach community surrounded by farmland:

-Engagements around 1 year

-Weddings are noted expensive

-A lot of couples elect to have weddings in the “off” months – because there isn’t much drastic change in weather year round – and you can get the venues for a lot cheaper during the fall/winter months

-Most weddings are outdoors

-A lot of weddings have the ceremony and reception at the same location

-Mostly evening weddings, when I told people I was having an 11:00am wedding they were confused (hey it’s cheaper)

-A lot of weddings are all-inclusive (including mine)

-Not a lot of DIY work I’ve noticed

-Most couples go on a honeymoon

-Most couples have been living together prior to getting married

-A lot of people don’t get married until their mid-late twenties

I'm with RayRay and Alisa..

I'm 34 FH 36. My idea of my wedding has significally changed over the years, and with the more weddings I attend, I find it really is based on age and religion/culture. I'm originally from Chicago, a melting pot of culture. I've been to Jewish weddings combined with Christian values, I've been to very Irish weddings with bag pipes and Irish blessings (that one was a TON of fun!) I've been to an Indian wedding that lasted 3 days. There is also the day time reception with passed hor dvours or the DW (I usually couldn't afford them). I've also been to barn yard country weddings, total DIY, and typical banquet halls/hotels. The younger the bride, the bigger the wedding is what I've typically seen. But they have all been pretty standard. I really think it's the person not the area.

Colorado weddings seem to be either ski themed or nature theme with a live blue grass band, most all outside. Most seem to be pretty causal.

I think this is a very interesting thread

I was raised in South Carolina, but have spent the last 5 years between San Antonio and Austin, TX so I'm sure how accurate mine will be, but here I go:

-Receptions are usually Buffet style

-BBQ is the meal of choice

-Always a DJ

-Money is pinned to the Bride & Groom throughout the reception

-Ceremony is in a church and reception in some kind of banquet hall

-At least 1 line dance, lol

-Don't be surprised to see the bride in cowboy boots

-Not as formal

-Usually a keg of beer instead of a formal open bar

-Indoor vs. Outdoor weddings depend on the time of year since it always hits the triple digits during the summer here.

That's all I got folks!

Something that is common in the midwest is the dollar dance. Where people pay a dollr or more to dance w/ the bride an groom.

South Florida

usually held at golf clubs or hotels

open bar definitely, no one will stay if not and you will be the talk of the town

passed hors doerves during cocktail hour

signature drinks are pretty common now

dinner can be either sit down or buffet

no dollar dance or anything like that

no games, again you will be the talk of the town

a lot of people are having weekend celebrations now, welcome party, rehearsal, wedding and brunch

honeymoon is very common, usually Caribbean since its close

My family is from Pittsburgh, I love the fact they always have cookie tables! I always look forward to it!

Northern CA Sounding off!!! I seem to be the only one! I'm from the Bay Area and also further north like 2 hours north of Sacramento...

-Ceremony & reception in same location about 85% of the time

-Everything is usually outdoors or at some sort of country club or golf club because they are the only ones in the area with room for larger weddings.

-Alcohol always served whether it be wine and beer or open bar - I've never been to a wedding with a cash bar. I've seen crazy - shots, etc. - to super mellow just depended on the age group and the amount of life in the party...

-Only saw the dollar dance twice and once and it was awesome, (not my taste); reason being was that it was a family tradition - they didn't realize other's did it and it was something from Grandma's side of the family did... anyways, they made things out of the $$ and attached it the B&G - like a rose for his lapel or a crown for her, or long streamers of $$ that were attached to her waist so it looked like a train of

$, it was insane. They both looked like they were in money costumes when they were done. Much better than holding a bag for the money to go into...just my opinion

What else....

-Always some sort of DIY - even for the crazy couture weddings

-Always a wedding coordinator of some sort

-Always a TON of dancing and always a DJ, I've only seen an ipod wedding once and it was for a smaller wedding...

-Engagements usually longer like 1-2 years typically depends on how much the B&G are paying for the more help they have the shorter the engagement... OR there have been a few that were super short like 6 months or less but they had help with paying for the wedding.

-Only one time did I see full sit down service, all the rest were buffet

-Weddings are typically rustic and really casual, a lot of fun and a reason to celebrate with a huge party - so about 90% guest list are over 130+

Also thanks for this thread, it's fun to see what weddings are like everywhere

Southern Ontario, Canada bride here with Italian decent...I think these traditions are usually based more on culture but almost every wedding I've been to has included:

-50/50 split for church/other type of venue for ceremony

-Almost always in a banquet hall for reception

-Always a cocktail/hors d'oevres hour directly after the ceremony (if at the same location) or as soon as people arrive to the reception location for roughly an hour or so

-Always a receiving line with escort cards, favours, shots, cookies where you meet the bridal party and congratulate the B&G

-Always open bar

-Always formal seated dinner

-Always a DJ, only once have I ever seen a band

-Never heard of a dollar dance before WW

-Almost always a card is given with money, very rarely gifts are given

-Bouquet toss/Garter toss almost always

-Cakes, not cupcakes

-Dancing 100% of the time

-Receptions usually last from 6pm-2am

-B&G are forced to kiss with some kind of game, glass clinking etc

-Family brunch the next day

Here in NM the old Mexican wedding traditions play a big role in many weddings. Bridal parties can get very large.

Receptions often have La Marcha ( a traditional wedding march)

Couples are engaged around a year and there is a strong mix of location preferences.

October is one of the most popular wedding months, the weather is nice and leaves are all yellowing.

Often a Party bus with a stripper pole in the back.

Generally cash bars

And lately A LOT of pinterest weddings, and trends that are at least a year behind the rest of the country.

North Carolina...welcome to the south...

-amongst the weddings I've attended its about 50/50 church and elsewhere. However, some people here do not consider you married unless you do it in a church(they're crazy).

-Children are always there, considered impolite not to invite them.

-Buffet style is the norm from what I've seen.

-either open bar or no alcohol at all (yes really) also really weird liquor laws means some venues only offer beer/wine and some do not allow alcohol at all.

-50/50 on the seating chart

-most of my friends didn't have limos. I live in Raleigh and there are no drop off services, only $400 minimum per limo...so I don't know if I will have one either.

-Nobody would dare do a dollar dance. My parents are from Michigan so that's the norm for them, but nobody here has heard of it.

-separate groom's cakes are considered normal.

-the best venues tend to be plantation style historic homes, or the beach

-everyone I know took a honeymoon

I'm from TN, my FH is from NY and we're getting married in FL (where we live). I never went to a wedding with a meal until my last year of college. Where I grew up they were always at church with a cake/punch reception in the church hall. No alcohol or music (my family is Baptist). My FH's dad was a minister and they always had full meals, open bars and dancing. We are having a limited bar (craft beer, wine, two sig drinks) dinner and a DJ. I also think I'm one of the first to marry outside of a church (other than my brother who did JoP). My grandfather was not happy about the no church part. It will surely be interesting to see. My family will be outside their comfort zone way more than his. We are doing a mix of southern food and more NY type fare so that should be fun. I've only seen my grandfather dance once before though hahahah. And both his grandfather and mine are stone deaf with thick accents (GA and Brooklyn) so that will be interesting...

Another NYC/MA girl.... basically most of the other have covered it

Weddings used to always be at a fancy hotel or banquet hall but now everyone is doing something "different" so lots of barns or farm type weddings in the past 3-5 yrs

Definitely always open bar and usually sit down dinner... its definitely noticed and mentioned if there is a cash bar (I think a big part of that is usually guests don't have a lot of cash on them bc its very very unexpected) and there is always a OMG Guess what XXX did last night story bc people definitely have fun and drink

Almost always a band but sometimes a DJ (again usually noticed by the score keeping crowd) - weddings are usually big parties and will go until they close the bar/turn lights on

You only give cash for wedding (you give a gift at the shower)

People tend to go on nice honeymoons (a couple I went to school w did 3m in SE Asia but a few weeks in EU is pretty standard)

NE Ohio/NW Pennsylvania norms:

1. Most people get married in a church.

2. A gigantic cookie table is a MUST at the reception.

3. Most receptions are at banquet halls.

4. Often it's a buffet.

5. Mostly open bars

6. Kids are always invited

7. Dollar/shot dance

I'm about 30 min from st. Louis mo

1 mostly church weddings

2. reception at a banquet hall

3. dollar dances

4. mix of not dancing and dancing

5. I've seen both cash and open bar as well as champagne/ beer only

6. dj over live band

7. shorter engagements

at least this is for the weddings i've been to

New Jersey

1 to 2 yrs engagement

Engagement party

Save the Dates announcements

Rehearsal dinner

Wedding ceremony in Church

Reception banquet halls

guests RSV (w/children)

buffet cocktail hr

Open bar (entire night)

assigned seating

Plated dinner w/3 choices, meat, chicken or fish

DJ or band (both)

Photographers, limo

Honeymoons

Greater Philadelphia area:

-I've seen anything from picnic weddings to elaborate $100k + weddings -- it all depends on the type of people you know.

-Split between church and ceremonies elsewhere

-Venues are mostly hotels and country clubs, but you see a lot of mansions, museums, nature areas, barns, church halls, etc.

-Almost always an open bar. If the liquor is too expensive, people will generally do at least open beer/wine. Cash bars are not very common and are frowned upon.

-Split between buffet vs. sit-down dinner

-Sit-down dinners always get place cards

-Engagements generally 6 months to 2 years

-All venues include a cocktail hour followed by a reception

-Never heard of a dollar dance!

-Most couples will block rooms in a hotel, and many will then offer a shuttle from the reception to the hotel at night

-I've seen both cakes and cupcakes

-Honeymoons are pretty common, but some people will wait a few months to go on a "real" one.