Wedding Day Duties List

I gave my best friend a timeline of my wedding day (from the time I wake up, until the time we hop on the party bus) along with notes for each item. She is my liaison for the entire day. She will have my phone and if ANYONE needs anything they need to go to her directly.

Someone in charge of photography list and manage photography timeline - Your photographer

· Someone to help me shop for lunch for the group (someone decisive!) - why do you need help buying food?

· Manage my phone - what is there to "manage" about your phont

o Be available for MUA upon arrival - you should be available

o Be available for photographer upon arrival - you should be available

o Venmo MUA - whoever is paying should venmo the MUA

· Ensure that I am hidden from Jacob for photos and heading to ceremony - everyone will kinda pitch in on thos, but of you dont want the stress, do a first look

· Make sure emergency kit is with us - do you have a DOC

· Setup dinner table upon arrival (bride will provide details) - do you not have a venue handling this?

Honestly, based in these questions you should hire a DOC cause NONE of this is your BPs job.

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That is smart, I was thinking about doing that but two of my best friends are my bridesmaids so I was hoping to maybe split up some of the things for the day, that we no one feels left out. Dealing with enough of people feeling left out already :/
Maybe I just give it to the two of them and let them split it themselves LOL

No judgment. Also it's against CGs to tell people to "move along".

Food for thought: maybe the reason you cant find a list is because you shouldn't assign these duties to people you didnt hire...js.

Photography list and photography timeline should be your photographers to manage. I discussed all of that with mine beforehand. For food we ordered a sandwich tray from Whole Foods and my wedding planner picked it up. I venmoed my makeup artist a week beforehand and I was there to greet her when she arrived and show her where to set up. To ensure you are hidden just designate different areas where y’all should be and if he needs to be near your area have him call one of your bridesmaids first. Emergency kit, rings, marriage license can be your maid of honor or best man. And to set up tables I would have your venue or vendors handle that.

View Quoted Comment Until very recently, wedding planners and day of coordinators only existed amongst the very rich, celebrities ( also rich) and for president's kids. More than 90% of weddings still do not use them. In our area, just for the Day and 2 3- hour premeetings the rock bottom minimum is $3000. And who in their right mind would pay $3-4000 of a $12000 budget for one, skipping, say, food? For centuries family members and wedding party have done helpful things on the wedding day, and before. As long as people are willing, and bride is not twisting arms and barking orders, which there are no signs of here, It is perfectly fine for others to help. DOC are not necessary. And neither wedding party nor family are all guaranteed never to lift a finger on a wedding day, as they would for any party or big event. Part of being family and friends is the minor favors and help the people give one another. That said, bride, Do not over think this. Someone to steer photographer or MUA while they stow equipment then start with first things, someone to deal with flower delivery or any unexpected deliveries, someone to be responsible for the lunch time meal are the biggies, you have them. You also may want someone to help early on, setting out women's dresses as they arrive, in place they will dress, brushing out any wrinkles. And your dress too, if you have transported it. You may have family who will do these things, or bp. Simply turn your phone to voicemail, and off. And you check about once every two hours. Not more often.

The only thing I'm asking my peeps to help with pre-wedding is to polish off the mimosas I'll be providing. I'll have a lunch order prepared and ordered the day before. The photographer and MUA will know where to go. I can push a button on my phone to venmo them as needed. Set my ringer to Do not disturb. The rest can be handled by a DOC. Or if you don't want to pay for one, then by yourself.

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Perhaps you should be more respectful in your response. It is literally everywhere- assign wedding duties - and ALL of my ladies have asked for this. So thank you for your response, but no one needs that type of negativity.

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Assign Duties to Wedding Party

It is literally listed as a task in the WW to do!!! Also it is not like she is asking the BP to move heaven and earth. It sounds like she wants pretty minor favors.

I am for DOC though (when this tasks get out of hand), so that everyone involved can just enjoy it!

Yeah I agree you dont have to hire a DOC. My BP have also asked for a list. That said a lot if this can be handled by you (be there when vendors arrive) or the vendors themselves (a good photographer will manage the schedule you give them ahead of time.)
I am having a couple friends who arent in the wp open the popcorn (so it doesn't get stale)
Also the groomsmen will guide guests to the reception area where we will be waiting to greet them. Once all gueata are out of the ceremony area, a couple grooms men are grabbing the flowers (2 vases) and moving them to the reception area. I also have a grooms men who will be shutting the reception doors and reopening them for the grand entrace (15 minutes later)
Someone else will be locking up the card box once everyone ia in.
My moh knows my bathroom schedulw because I will need her help lol and her and another bm know when I will need their help bustling my dress.

View Quoted Comment You could have one of your bridesmaids be your “right hand man” and help with the tasks and one of your bridesmaids handle the guests or any problems that arise with your guests. That way they both have a pretty important job.. Keeping the bride calm in both scenarios. Hope that makes sense.

My coordinator is handling the duties for the day. That's what I paid her for. She cost us about $600. It is possible to find one that isn't an arm and a leg. Most of the things you listed should be handled by you and FH.

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It does, thanks!

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I appreciate your feedback, unfortunately some of this just won't work for my wedding. I am very limited on light so I do need someone to make sure that my family doesn't get out of hand with photos, like a backup support for my photographer and 2 of my bridesmaids have already offered to help with this. I don't have a planner, I am the planner so I will be doing a run to the store in the morning or maybe the night before to make sure that I have things for everyone to eat for lunch. I cannot designate areas for my groom and me to ensure we are separate, that just isn't a possibility. I am planning to have him coordinate with one of my bridesmaids, which is why it is on the list. We aren't doing MOH or Best Man so I can't designate one person or two to do these things. My venue isn't a "venue", we are having a super small casual dinner. These are crazy small tasks and everything I have listed are all things that my bridesmaids have asked about or offered to help with. Since it is on the checklist of things "assign wedding duties" I was just trying to think of what I am missing. I can't designate one person because I am already dealing wtih people feeling left out. So I need to split these up. This isn't because I need it, it is because I am trying to make them feel involved. I have planned and done 90% of everything (the other 10% was my Fiance) up until now... so I am trying to let go a little and allow people to help. - sorry I went on a bit there

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I was planning to do this with one of my best friends who is my bridesmaid but it turns out that other bridesmaids want to be more involved.... So I am trying to come up with things and split them up among-st the team.

Based on your negative reaction to others who have answered the question in a way you don't want, I am sure you are going to be annoyed by this.

But don't assign them those things. If you hired professionals for your wedding - a photographer - they should be able to handle all of these. If you need someone to handle your phone, your best option is to simply turn it off and leave it somewhere. Whomever is paying should venmo the HMUA. If you would like an emergency kit, pack one and just hand it to someone day of. And if you are worried about being indecisive on lunch, order it the day before.

Your wedding party are not your employees and assigning them menial tasks such as these is ridiculous. I've been in multiple wedding parties and never once been asked to 'handle a phone'.

Tbh I hired a DOC and it was the best decision ever. Assign duties all you want, but be prepared for things not to happen as planned. BM's themselves have to get ready and it's super time consuming. You have to be on a different timeline than your guests and wedding party. Other posters are correct, your Photographer will manage the timeline for any pre or post wedding pictures. Another reason I chose a DOC was there were no post wedding hard feelings with anyone in the wedding party if there was a slip up. She was being paid to manage everything. I didn't consider a DOC as a wedding expense but more as a gift to myself.

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I don't see how I was not respectful. Multiple people said the same thing I did. Why latch onto me?

All I can say is good luck in planning and executing your wedding. Hope it turns out the way you want

I think all of the big things here, with the exception of managing your phone and avoiding FH, can be done in advance. You should know in advance when your vendors are arriving and they should know where to go to find you. Your photographer should have your timeline in advance. You should figure out a plan for lunch in advance. You should pack your emergency kit, rings, and Wedding license the day before. Your officiant will know to ask for what they need before the ceremony.

Venmo-ing takes 30 seconds, tops, so I would think you can do that whenever it’s needed.

Table set up is not something you or your BP should be doing. Won’t your venue handle that?

All in all, I agree with comments that assigning tasks to your BP is a little bridezilla-ey. I think with proper planning you won’t need to, and your BMs can enjoy the day. If you’re that worried, a DOC would be a worthwhile expense (even in DC where I am, I was getting quotes for as low as $800).

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Thanks but this isn't really relevant. As I have mentioned, these are things my bridesmaids have asked about. Not to mention, assigning day of duties is literally on the wedding wire checklist. It doesn't make me bride-zilla if I am trying to find things to give to them because they have asked. I literally had a plan for all of these things and wasn't going to but since they keep asking about it I am trying to put together things to help them be more involved.
I will know when my vendors are arriving, I have coordinated all of that. My photographer does have the timeline. I have a lunch plan. I started putting together my emergency kit and then hurt my bridesmaids feelings because apparently they were doing that and I didn't know. My venue isn't a venue, it isn't that kind of wedding so no, they won't be setting up the dinner table. Not to mention, my bridesmaids are already fighting over who is going to do that. I am not worried about any of this, I don't need a DOC nor do I have the money to do that. I got this. I simply asked what to add to the wedding day duties because it is on the wedding wire checklist. If you don't have anything to add to the list, then you aren't helping me.