Wedding after being married?

I wouldn't want to go to someone's fake wedding, personally. If you want to elope or have a small intimate wedding that's fine. If you want a traditional wedding next summer, wait to get married until then and skip the charade. What's the rush?

If you go through with this, I suggest being very open about already being married with your guests.

Why does anyone need to know your married?? No one needs to know except both of your parents! Keep it a secret and definitely dont change any wording. Just get married and still have the wedding of your dreams!! It will be a cute little secret between you two Congrats hun!

I am doing this and frankely I don't care about what people think about this as said in other cases this is my wedding and I need medical insurance, we are going through infertility, mainly me =(. We got married in March and still pushed for our August wedding. My wording on invites were really sweet. My first ceremony was no invitations I previously sent out stds in January when we first got engaged. I will post my wording for the August one.

Your wedding next year would be considered a vow renewal. So instead of inviting people to "witness the marriage of bride and groom," you can invite them to join you as your renew your vows to each other. You can also call it a celebration of your marriage.

As long as it is clear to your guests that you are already married, that is okay. Many couples do this for a variety of reasons, whether it is military, budget or whatever.

Boy met girl. Girl met boy. Boy fell in love. Girl was slow. But finally came to her senses and fell in love too. Colleen Juanita ____ & Michael Scott ____ (we used our new last name matching) Invite you to share in a new chapter of their love story as they will formally express their commitment to each other with family and friends present

date time location.

I like the secret aspect but I love him too much to hide it. Plus we will be celebrating our March as our wedding. I have my marriage and now I want my wedding.

I would appreciate that.

What I liked on my invites no where I put 'wedding', I never planned on hiding this from anyone everyone gets 'their' day and I refuse to give up my moment and it will be like marrying him a second time and I would marry him over and over again. He is definitely my one and only.

I know of a couple who had a destination wedding & return to have a reception a couple of months later. Having a vow renewal is important & guest will enjoy it just the same. But not being honest can backfire, be up front, your guest will appreciate it.

OMG i love it, its perfect.. thank you so much

Just call it a vow renewal.

The problem with the "secret" aspect is that you're lying to your guests. People find out that they've been deceived and it's hurtful when they thought they were witnessing your marriage.

You might think you can keep the secret, but your marriage date is public record. Bringing close family members to the first ceremony means that they too have to lie about it and hide it after that.

Vow renewal is better.

I like the idea of a vow renewal. I say if you want a ceremony then go for it. I have friends who were in a similar situation and that was their original plan. I'd definitely go and I wouldn't judge them for it. I would be a little offended if the marriage was kept a secret though.

I don't understand people being offended if they didn't know you were already married, but that's just me; I've been to plenty of "big weddings" where the folks had already gone and eloped, but it wasn't done "in the church" so in the families eyes they were married "legally" but..well, not by the church. I didn't know it, and it didn't bug me at all when I found out.

HOWEVER, take above posters advice. Better to be upfront than to possible cause a spat between yourself and others. Vow renewal, or "celebration" or whatever you want to call it, perfectly fine.

What you will be having is not a wedding, its a vow renewal. I wouldnt mention anything on the invite about a wedding, because you are already married. Just call is a vow renewal or a celebration.

As far as keeping it a secret, that is a really bad idea. I would just be honest with your guest. & like Starbuck said, your marriage is already public record. If I went to a wedding, spent time and money on travel arrangements, hotels, and a gift, just to find out they were already married & I had just attended a fake marriage, Id be PISSED. Its way better to be up front about it.

I agree with starbuck. I think you should be upfront about it. But its your wedding and ultimately your choice. Vow renewal is better i agree

@Meg: I don't mean to hi-jack your thread, but I'm really interested as to why anyone would be offended at attending this as a "wedding"? There are plenty of people that have a small legal ceremony, but then a blow-out church ceremony and reception - all under the guise of a "wedding". Yes, their "legal" date of marriage was the legal ceremony, but the spirit of the celebration is the same, isn't it?

I'm just asking because, as I stated before - I've been to "non-wedding" weddings and didn't find out til they celebrated their "1 yr anniversary" on a different date. But I was far from offended...it didn't really matter to me.

I don't understand why people would be offended either I would just be glad that I was invited regardless if you were married already or not I feel like that's between you and your spouse and whoever you want to know that's just me.

I am with Deborah on this one. I don't understand being offended either but everyone has their own reaction. I've been to "weddings" where the couple had married earlier. I could care one hoot. I was just happy to celebrate with them. There are a myriad of reasons why people may marry in secret and disclosing that fact ahead of time may not necessarily be something the couple can do.

My brother and SIL did this. We were invited to the wedding in March of 2007. I was so excited and booked the plane tickets, took vacation to watch my little brother get married. I found out a month later they were already married, it hurt my feelings greatly that I was lied to and suckered out of several hundreds of dollars on my travel to view a fake wedding. Not to mention I wasted 4 days of vacation that I could have used that summer to spend with my daughter. I didn't speak to my brother or SIL for a long time afterward. I would seriously re-consider doing this before you ruin your relationships with your friends and family.

I would be up front and honest with them by calling it a vow renewal instead of your wedding. Are you seriously going to lie to your family for the rest of your life because you got married in March but let everyone think you got married in October? There is nothing that could possibly go wrong with that for the next 50 years......

Agreed!! its not about your guest. Its about you and your spouse. you cant please the whole world!!