Waiting for rsvp responses when you have a b list...

There is nothing you can do, and for all the reasons you stated why. No reason for me to repeat them. You will have to hold out.

If you are concerned about being rude, a b-list is rude. "Sorry you didn't make the first cut. You'll just have to wait until I see if someone who did isn't coming before I can add you or your date."

Ditch the whole b-list plan and just go with the guests you currently have invited.

You can wish that people would respond all you want, but you can't nudge them. You chose the rsvp date.

I share your same frustration but it's out of our control..... so time to worry about something else :-)

Yeah you can't do anything about it. If you wished people would RSVP by now you should've set the RSVP date for now.

"But some of my guests without +1s are getting anxious and they need to make travel accommodations soon." Is anyone waiting to see if they get a plus one to determine if they come or not? Can they make their travel arrangements (I assume flight and hotel) and if they get a plus one later then their plus one and buy a ticket for the same flight? I don't see how 1 or 2 would make a difference for what they book.

You will have to wait it out - I had quite a few response cards come in right before the wedding.

Yeah the main concern is for guests who want to bring a +1 but did not originally receive a +1. It's dependent on those who haven't RSVP'ed yet. the +1's would need to book a flight and it's just getting more expensive as the date is getting closer.

also, is it rude to invite more people? I moved to a new city this year and have made some friends now and are considering inviting them, but would it be obvious it's pretty late in the invite game? not to mention, rude?

Normally B-listing in general is considered rude. But, if you've made brand new friends and you have extra space I could see how this breech of etiquette could be considered okay. If you do invite them, I'd be upfront, letting them know that you really appreciate your new friendship, and while you made the guest list a long time ago, you have extra space and would be honored if they were able to attend.

It's actually this very reason I'm leaving room in my guest list to invite people, as I just moved to a new city and have a few months before I'll send out invites.