VENT: Father/Step father daughter dances!!!

Continued..... Now that I am calming down anyone have any advice or ideas for song for my step dad?

@MissEtoMrsB- stealing Cinderella was my second choice too cause when I was little my dad called me his princess. It's just so hard not hurt there feelings. I swear they are more sensitive about these things than I am. I love them both so much. They should be happy for that!!!

I did a father daughter dance with my dad & step dad also. They both walked me down the aisle to. I allowed them to pick the songs.

my dad pick My Little Girl by Tim McGraw

my step dad picked My Wish by Rascal Flatts - it turned out to be the perfect song!!

As for you mom's reactions I think she's overreacting. Its just a song and I'm sure your step dad will just be excited to have this moment with you and not care what the songs mean.

@Samantha- Thank you I do love both of those songs. I wanted them to both walk me down but, they wouldn't so that was why my son is now.

I so know she is overreacting which is definitely her but, i thought she would relax even though its been a while since she has done something like this dealing with the wedding. She also has a tendency to tell me how she will feel & say that is how my step dad will feel even though its not true.

I had a very hard time picking a song to dance with my stepfather (who is my dad), so I can only imagine what you are going through having to do it two times. Someone once suggested "Stepfather of the bride" by Mike McLaughlin. I liked the lyrics because it does talk about not taking the place of your actual dad. Hope this helps!

What about My Girl? That's what I'm doing with my dad and it seems like it could apply everywhere.

I'd say either ask him what he thinks, what song he wants, or... Can they share a song? You could start off dancing with your Dad and then half way through (at a certain agreed upon part of the song) your step dad could come over and cut in.... and then maybe at another agreed upon part, your New DH could cut in on the step-dad......

What about "He Didn't Have to Be" by Brad Paisley, I think that would be a great song for a step-father/daughter dance.

I Loved Her First is one of the most common father daughter dances so I don't think that -and in all reality, your dad DID love you first because your step-dad wasn't in your life yet. I'm sure you will find an equally special to your Step-Dad. If it's really a huge deal, and you have a good relationship with step-dad, just ask him how he would feel.

Hmm I could see how that song would be hurtful to a step dad. Have you talked to him about it?

My stepdad walked me down the aisle, but my biological father is not in the picture at all so not as awkward as your situation. We also danced to "My Wish."

@ Nicole... He Didn't Have To Be, is a great song about a step-dad.... its from the son's point of view, but its a great song!

@Lulu- He didn't have to be is a great song!

@Nicole-I told him the song I picked for my dad a few weeks ago and he was fine with that.

@Staci- He was fine with that song being my dads song. He knows I have a good relationship with both of them. He said he would try & think of one but, if not he trusted me that I would pick a good one.

I'm dancing with my dad to I loved her first too! great song! Your mother is def overreacting! good luck

Thank you ladies

I will be dancing with both my dad and stepdad too! I couldn't find a fatherly song that adequately suited our relationship. So far I'm going with "Have I told you lately" by Rod Stewart for him. Not a super romantic love song, but since we're not overly vocal with I love yous it hit him right in the feels when I asked him about it.

Still working on a song for my dad.. Leaning towards "You're gonna miss this" by Trace Adkins, but very undecided on that one.

@NenaBear- you're gonna miss this always brings me to tears. & I do have "Have a told you lately on a the list already & that is a great song possibility for my step dad

Amanda, tell your mom to read the lyrics to the song. "I loved her first, I held her first", etc. It talks about your biological father being there when you were born. It's not a competition -- it's just a matter of fact. Who saw you smile first (that's a lyric in the song) -- your biological father or your step father? Of course, it was your biological father. Why take that away from him or turn it into the stuff of a competition? It's a statement of fact, and the fact is that your biological father was there first. None of this diminishes what your stepfather means to you or what he did for you. However, the idea that history can be rewritten simply because the marriage between your parents didn't last? Well, that's unfair to you and to your biological father.

This is your call, and if you feel that this song fits, then by all means, have the DJ play it without maternal guilt pressuring you to pin the blue ribbon on your stepfather's tux. Remind mom that your relationship with your stepfather is a healthy one, but it is not the same relationship she has with him, and it never will be.

There are some good online suggestions for stepfather/stepdaughter dances. There's "Forever Young" (Blake Shelton if you like country, Rod Stewart if you like rock/pop), "Can you Feel the Love Tonight", " I Hope you Dance", and "You and Me" -- all appropriate.

@centerpiece- thank you for that. Virtual hugs!!!!

Well and not to mention that "I Loved Her First" is directed at your FH, NOT another parent. It's not about competition at all. It's about a father telling his daughter's husband that he was the one that got to love her first. It's not a rub in the face of a step (god I love dividing lines) parent.

I danced with my father and step-father. I danced with my dad to "Hallelujah" (Jeff Buckley version) because it's one of our favorites and a bit of an inside joke. I danced with my step-dad to "Wild Horses" by The Rolling Stones. Again, favorite that we share and some (not all) of the lyrics make me think of how he was the one that raised me and was there for me as a child.

I hope you find something that speaks to you. I know music is very important to me and I didn't stop changing my mind until I was sure the choices I made would still resonate with me years later.