Unask a bridesmaid

If you "unask" her, just be prepared for the friendship to end.

ETA: What kinds of things do you need her to be available for?

....your wedding is a YEAR from now. What do you need her to do? Why did you ask anyone to be a part of your bridal party this far in advance?

Yes, it is rude to un-ask a bridesmaid, unless you are willing to lose them as a friend.

Yes, it is rude. If you do that, be prepared for the friendship to be over.

I was planning to start picking out their dresses, I didn't want to get far behind.

Just remember to give her written notice and termination pay.

*eye roll*

Okay thank you!

It's very rude. New brides to be: THIS IS WHY YOU DO NOT ASK EARLY.

You don't need for them to order their dresses this early.

You can probably wait until the summer to order their dresses. My girls ordered from DB and they all came within a month.

If you don't care about the friendship, then sure you can.

But give her time, talk to her and let her know your plans and why its so important to you.

Tsk tsk, another story of an under-performing employee.

You asked way way too early. And you don't need to start looking for their dresses until at LEAST 6 months out. You will end the friendship if you "unask" her. Is that something you are okay with doing?

Has she had her mid-year review?

ps ***advice***

EXTREMELY rude. Like, straight to etiquette hell rude.

Is it possible that she has a life of her own and is busy??? Sorry but your can summon her like a butler.

It's only rude if you don't offer her a three-month severance package and a good reference. A non-compete clause would be crappy.

So i had someone like that and i basically asked all my bridesmaids at the same time if they thought they could do this and she let me know privately that she couldn't so i made her a usher instead

@TIFFANY: A bridesmaid stepping down of her own volition is one thing. Kicking someone off the bridal party is a completely different matter.

My sister is the MOH and is currently getting her masters in architecture. She is very hard to reach! I know she's super busy, so I don't mind, but it would still be nice to hear what she thinks. If I can't get a hold of her, I'll ask another bridesmaid and we usually figure things out. Thankfully she'll be done by June so she'll be more available for the shower and wedding itself. I am having a little bit of trouble with the dresses with 2 BM's, though. They're taking forever getting to the dress store for measurements and are delaying everyone's order. Luckily we planned early for this very reason, but it would be nice to not hear an excuse for missing every appointment since Christmas and it's now Presidents' Day and still no measurements. Don't know if this helps with your specific situation but at least u know that others have trouble with bridal parties, too good luck!

@danielle thats just it she was about to get kicked out but i didnt want it to mess up our friendship so i opened the door for her to come in and tell me how she felt before i just fired her