To Change Your Last Name Or Not To Change Your Last Name...that Is The Question

I am changing my last name. I completely understand why some people choose to hyphenate or keep their name, but it's never really been a question for me. My current last name is kinda long and a bit complicated because it is two words. It always makes it difficult when someone has to look up my name. They always think that the first part is my middle name or they drop the second part completely. It is also very important to my fh that we share a name and it is to me as well.

I feel the same way you do! I’ve never been willing to bend on giving up my last name. I’m too attached to it and my family. And I hate that the name change sentiment goes back to a woman being property. (I was adamant my FH not ask for permission to ask me to marry him because of this. He just let my parents know ahead of time.)

We’re both hyphenating our last names. Neither of us wanted to give them up; but it was important to my FH that we share the same last name. We don’t care for tradition. We’re blazing our own path 😄

I'm not exactly sure what I am doing yet. I am trying to decide between changing it completely or taking both last names/hyphenating. My FH would really like me to just take his last name but I am having a hard time dropping my last name completely. I have a super common first name so I have always gotten my identity from my last name. My FH's last name is also super plain and common so I'm having a hard time imagining how boring my full name would be lol. I am not changing it right away as we are in the process of closing on our new home and it would slow down the process, so I will take a few weeks to think about it before deciding what to do. If I do completely change it, I will most likely still go by my current last name professionally.

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I decided to change my last name for consistency purposes when we have our family.

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I love the hyphenating idea! If Jay Z and Beyonce' can do it then why can't we? Lol.

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I understand the struggle. I am a teacher and got married towards the end of the school year so my students and colleagues are struggling to switch over to my new last name.

Right now FH and I are planning to pick a new last name so we're both getting a new name but also will have the same last name.

To be honest though, considering all the paperwork involved sometimes I wonder if we'll actually get around to it. We've been living in our apartment for 2.5 years now and neither of us has gotten around to changing our addresses formally yet.

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OMG I didn't know you could do that! Genius idea.

I’m changing my last name. It has nothing to do with “a man owning me” or “giving up my identity” (These are things that have been said to me about changing my name). And my reason is plain and simple; I want to do it. I want the same last name as my husband. I don’t think the fact that we’ll share a last name will cause me to lose my identity or make it so I can’t have my own life. So 🤷🏻‍♀️ I think to each their own. Everyone has their own views. I just can’t wait to share a last name with my husband.

Nope. I have biz publications under my name & we’re not planning on kids. Maybe someday I’ll change it but been happily married for two years and still fine with my maiden name. 😊

I changed my last name. We have a son together and I wanted to share my last name with my kids. I completely understand why people don’t change it though, but I didn’t have a serious connection with my last name and I always knew I’d change it when I got married.

I am changing my last name. While I understand those that choose to hyphenate or keep their own last name, I am excited to be a part of my fiancé's family. I am proud to show that I am a Brittain, and I've been practicing my new signature for almost a year now

No I'm keeping my name. It would be too much of a hassle to change it. I would have to wait because I need my passport for honeymoon. Then immediately I start a new job plus I've applied to grad school. All with my maiden name. Then I would have to get a new social security card, passport, license, update all my info. Way too much work for something that doesn't matter.

Hey! Here's my opinion...I KNOW my FH. Inside and out. I know he will never view me as someone that he "owns". I thought about the idea of keeping my last name, but it's important to him so I didn't think too much about it. In fact, as we will become "one" in marriage, I love that having one last name further symbolizes "one" team....at least to us. In order for that to happen, one of us would have to give up our last name...it might as well be me! Because #sacrifice and #love. (or there is the hyphen idea, but it just seems a little complicated/wordy sometimes, so it's not the route I personally am taking). Furthermore, you mentioned that it is a huge sacrifice to take his last name, and I just want to say props to you! Marriage will be all about sacrifice, and it sounds like you've already gotten a good grasp on that.

I think in today's culture, saying things terms like "sacrifice" and "selflessness" have a negative association tied to them, as if the person loses herself/himself by continually loving their partner selflessly, but I'd say this consistent attitude in fact creates the healthiest relationship possible, allowing both partners to be the best versions of themselves. That's a bit of tangent, but I hope it helps you think about the best decision for you and your FH. Best of luck to you!

I am changing my last name, and excited to do so! It has nothing to do with him "owning" me, etc.... I am changing it because we are becoming a unit, and our kids will have our last name as well! He has two daughters already with his last name, and I am joining the family. I am, however, very attached to my last name. It is very unique and was passed down through the women in my family (my grandmother, to my mom, to me), so I will be adding it to my middle names (yes I have two already, lol). It will be long, but it makes the most sense, to me at least!

I'm about 95% sure i'm changing my last name because i feel like it brings us closer together as a family and i can't wait for that aspect of it... but FH totally was not expecting me to and was surprised when i brought it up. apparently he thought i was the type of person who seemed like she'd keep her last name? i'm not sure what "type" that is or what's he trying to say about me, haha. i don't have a middle name, and i'm planning to have my maiden name for my middle name, so i don't feel like i'm losing anything. the only thing holding me back is what a pain it will be to change everything.

I'm changing mine. I have a past full of traumas and changing my last name gives me a feeling of freedom from that part of my life. Aside from that I'm just excited to share a name with FH.

I personally hold the outlandish belief we should use women's last names as maternal lineage is often more correct than paternal. Also if you have children the woman typically births them, so I think they should get the mother's name. I made it clear to my fiance when we first started dating I wasn't changing my name. Turns out he agrees with me and wants to change his name so it worked out

I will be changing mine. I understand why some people wish to keep theirs, but that’s not for me. We plan on having a family and I would want all of us to share the same name.

I will be changing my last name. We plan on having a family and i want us all to have the same last name. Plus im excited to have my new last name. Im honestly shocked to see some brides saying they are keeping their last name because of independence and not wanting to be seen as property. I dont see it that way at all