Stepmom questions

I have a step mom too and I'm including her in everything just as if she was a mom without the "step" if she means a lot to you, I'm sure she would understand that you aren't trying to be offensive, also I'm sure everyone will know who your mom is and who your step mom is. Try not to stress it too much or you could just ask her what she would like you to do in this situation in order for you both to be comfortable

What about "bride with Mom Anne" and "bride hugging Mom Becky".

I see no issue with including the both of them. If they both understand that they're in your life, and they are comfortable with the idea, then why not include both? I think that you are very lucky to have two women who love you like moms love their kids. I have no relationship with my stepmother, and my mom passed 20 yrs ago.

I Like Michele's idea, but be sure to check with your mom, and step mom beforehand.

How do you introduce your stepmom to people? If you've been saying, "This is my stepmom, Susan," I doubt she's going to suddenly take offense at your use of the same word in reference to her in an I Spy game.

Jessica I was thinking that too. My mom would flip if I ever mentioned my step mom as "mom" anything! Lol luckily my stepmom completely understands and knows that I mean no offense and dont mean to make her feel like she's second place or doesnt measure up to being a "real" mom

I usually call her by her name. I watched her at my brothers wedding September 1st 2012 and she didn't expect to be included but you could since that she was uncomfortable. No one did anything to separate her but no one did anything to include her. I am the oldest daughter of 13 kids with the youngest actually by her. My dad was EXTREMELY lose back in his younger days. I know that my relationship is different with her then my brother. I just do not want to have her feel like she is being forced in rather than just being a part of. I know I am blessed to have her and that's why I want to make sure she feels that on my wedding. She is just as important to me as my mom.

I'm sticking with talkin to her to see how she feels and you guys make the choice together. I know exactly how you feel! I hope you can come to some sort of agreement that works best for the relationship that you two have together

Just use her name, that is what I would do. I jokingly refer to my stepmom as my stepmonster and she loves it! However, I would never do that in public. We have a great relationship but she is not my mom, she is a very special person and friend in my life. I always refer to her by her name so if it were me, I would use her name.

Thanks everyone for the advice. I am going to use her nickname that all of her step children call her momma quita.

I love the idea of using her nickname! It's super personal and will probably make her feel more included than anything else. It's great that you want her to be as much a part of your day as you do your mother, and I'm sure she'll appreciate the effort you are making to do this.

I will be using stepmother, as that is how I refer to her now. We have a great relationship and I don't think stepmother is a negative thing that has to be changed. She often calls me her "gift"daughter as she only had boys herself, so on her tote bag that will carry her MOB gift it will say "Gift-mother of the Bride"