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Tiffany
Savvy May 2022

Staying apart on for the night before the wedding?

Tiffany, on July 24, 2021 at 3:55 PM Posted in Planning 4 215
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Hi everyone! Wondering what everyone is doing the night before the wedding? My fiancé and I have been together 9 years (it will be 10 years before the wedding) and we’re trying to figure out what we should do the night before the wedding! Our wedding is semi-destination. It’s about an hour from our house and the rehearsal is taking place within the hotel, the night before, so we will already be there. We want to stay together the night before however I worry that we will regret it and wish we stuck to “tradition.” If we stay apart, this will also double our hotel expense which isn’t a huge deal, but worth noting...


What’s everyone else doing?! Also, if we stay together, he will be leaving the room bright and early and we won’t be seeing each other until our first looks later in the day.
Thanks!

215 Comments

Latest activity by Casey, on November 1, 2021 at 9:00 AM
  • Tiffany
    Savvy May 2022
    Tiffany ·
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    I’m also not looking for the classic “do whatever makes you happy” answer. Just wondering what people are doing these days and if this tradition is super old school at this point.
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  • Alyssa
    Super October 2023
    Alyssa ·
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    It's never even crossed my mind to spend the night apart. Our venue comes with a farm house to stay the night before and after in. So my dress will be in a separate room in the house, when we wake up we will probably drink coffee together then once getting ready starts split off to different areas.


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  • Tiffany
    Savvy May 2022
    Tiffany ·
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    Fantastic, I love this! Thank you!
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  • Katie
    Expert August 2021
    Katie ·
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    I'm going to be sleeping at my parents place the night before our big day. I want the very first time he sees me on our wedding day to be after I'm all done up.
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  • S
    Savvy May 2022
    Sara ·
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    We're getting 2 rooms... bridal party in one, groom and his guys in the other. Obviously small party lol
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  • W
    VIP September 2020
    Willow ·
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    I don't see the point in getting a separate room. He's not going to see you WHILE you're getting made up, and it's an added expense. If you sleep better with him in the bed, more the reason to not do separate rooms. You want to be well rested for your special day
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  • Tiffany
    Savvy May 2022
    Tiffany ·
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    Such good advice. We never spend nights alone really so I would imagine I would have trouble sleeping. Thank you!
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  • AB
    Devoted September 2022
    AB ·
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    Tbh we were going to, but funny story ahead, kinda, lol 🤣 I now have a fear that I will get a black eye! FH and I have a king size bed, well for a couple nights we slept outside on our guest bedroom bed (queen size) since it is so hot and he moved around A TON. Well at one point he elbowed me perfectly in my eye- and I swelled up like a balloon!! Seriously, it was HUGE. So now I am scared that our sleeping arrangement, which will be a queen bed at a dude ranch, will be too small and I am not going to have a swollen shut eyeball on my wedding day!! 🤣 lol never something I would’ve thought of before, but we both toss and turn so probably not a good mix the night before our wedding!
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  • Tiffany
    Savvy May 2022
    Tiffany ·
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    Hahaha well good thinking!! That would be extremely unfortunate!
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  • C
    Super July 2020
    Cool ·
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    We did separate rooms. I got the suite that we would stay in the night of the wedding, that way I had room to get ready with a friend in the morning (covid/ DIY HMU). He got a different room the night before and had the hotel bring his luggage up to the bigger room after he left. It worked out really well for us.
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  • Betty
    Dedicated July 2021
    Betty ·
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    So we got married about 10 days ago... we are a bit old school & even though we have been together for 11 years haven't "lived" together (we have sleep overs, cruises & vacations together ~ LOL). We didn't do a rehearsal as our venue is about 1.5 hours away. I did mani/pedi's with my MH the day before & she and I went to dinner after. Since we were utilizing a hotel for our wedding venue & I knew I wanted to get ready there ~ I stayed at the hotel the night before (this allowed me to bring all the "stuff" ie: favors, decorations, luggage, my dress & his attire, etc. to the hotel). This also allowed me to have the suite to get ready in, my hair/makeup girl arrived about noon as did my MH. We had an evening wedding. DH arrived later in the afternoon & used the "get ready room" provided by our hotel to get ready in (it didn't have a view or the amenities' of the suite). We didn't do "first looks" as he really wanted to see me for the first time that day when I was walking into the ceremony.

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  • Sarah
    Super August 2021
    Sarah ·
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    We are sleeping in same hotel room the night before and we are all going out to breakfast the morning of the wedding. So my fh and I will be seeing a bit of each other before the wedding.
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  • Lisa
    Super October 2021
    Lisa ·
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    We’ve been together for almost ten years & living together nearly the entire time.


    With that said, I’m staying at the hotel I’ll be getting ready at the night before and he’s staying at our house.
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  • B
    VIP July 2017
    Becky ·
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    My mom needed to have her hotel room for two nights (because otherwise she wouldn't be able to take her stuff over early enough) and so H stayed in that room and my mom stayed with me at our apartment. He didn't want to see me before the walk down the aisle, so we didn't do a first look either. It was definitely very weird sleeping alone, though.

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  • Michelle
    Rockstar December 2022
    Michelle ·
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    We aren’t superstitious and don’t sleep well apart
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  • Sydney
    Dedicated October 2021
    Sydney ·
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    My fiancé and I are each planning to spend the night before the wedding in an Airbnb with our bridal parties. He will be with the groomsmen and I will be with the bridesmaids. He will join me in my room at the bridal Airbnb for the night of the wedding and a couple night after.
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  • Marshaya
    Dedicated April 2022
    Marshaya ·
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    Me and FH will be at the same Hotel just different rooms,we'll have a first touch but he will fully see me upon my entrance into the church
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  • Rachel
    Savvy July 2021
    Rachel ·
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    I stayed at my parents' house and my husband stayed at our apartment! I didn't want him to see me until our first look!
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  • I
    Expert August 2021
    Ingrid ·
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    We've been together for almost 15 years so ew will say at our venue and then separate before it's time to start getting ready. If he wants to stay apart that night he will come back to our house for the night, but doubt he will do that as his family and our friends are staying at the venue as well.

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  • Megan
    Just Said Yes October 2021
    Megan ·
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    We are staying apart the night before! I’m crashing with my sister in the “bridal suite” hotel room we are using to get ready and hang out the morning of the wedding! My fiancé is staying with a couple of groomsmen in the “grooms suite.” Honestly I think it will make first look a little more impactful even though we are not having a super traditional wedding.
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