Sooo what if you dont like your engagement ring?

I know... I feel horrible but its been eating at me especially when he compliments the ring. I've said nothing but just agree and put on a fake smile. I feel horrible.

Well I have a co-worker who has been married for 20 yrs now. She told me in the beginning her ring was "small" but you should see her bling now. In other words she said as years went by he upgraded, upgraded, and upgraded. So you and FH can always get rings you desire more for "anniversaries, valentines, christmas ect...... " Just think it won't be your last ring from him but your 1st of many!!!

Hope this helps!

Oh noooo! please dont tell him that you dont like the ring, you may hurt his feelings. When you to love birds go searching for wedding bands just make it clear as possible of what you want. hope this will help.

Well U don't want to start your marriage with a lie. I would tell him but be gentle and use TACT. I would do it now before he cant take it back. There is not point in having spent money on a ring that you do not like. I would ask him why he chose the ring? Maybe for him there was a reason that made it special. There had to be a reason he got you something that was the opposite of what you showed him that you like.

Thanks ladies. *sigh* I dont want to continue lying. I'm just gonna ask him what made it significant and when we go wedding band hunting, show him rings that I think are lovely and hope he gets the hint. I thought I was going to get bashed for feeling this way but you ladies are so helpful and loving here. I'm a newbie and I have not seen anyone bash anyone the past few days that I have been on here. I'm gonna love it on here. Thanks so much for the advice!

I would be CRUSHED if my FW didn't like the ring I chose for her. At the same time though I had a really good idea of what she wanted and I listened to her suggestions. If this is a complete 180 of what you talked about wanting then I do think you have some right to bring it up, but you need to be very careful, and be prepared for him to not take it well and be very upset. All of that being said, f there is anyway that you can live with it and learn to love it you need to do that though.

Thank you! It is good to hear a male's point of view. I guess I will just suck it up. I dont want to crush him.

I think gentle hints are your best bet. It sounds like he would be crushed to know you much you dislike it. Hopefully it can be replaced or upgraded soon...

And welcome to WW!

Thanks Jessica. That made me feel a little better.

I kind of agree with Glenn. On the other hand, I couldn't fake liking the ring either. This is a difficult situation.

Maybe he had a really good reason why he didn't get what you liked.

Well, when it is ban time, just make big hints.

Good luck!

I think that if you absolutely hate it you need to say something, if you can learn to love it you need to deal with it. I will tell you that if one of my buddies told me his FW told him that she didn't like his ring that I'd probably tell him to get rid of her (not saying he really should or that you need to feel wrong about not liking it, but that's definitely what a guys reaction would be and what guys friends are going to say).

Thanks. I probably wont say anything. I'll just appreciate what I do have.

Yeah I agree with Glenn and Carole B. A friend of mine didn't like hers and he was CRUSHED. She didn't approach it very well, and they both were hurt. I think that as long as you are very very careful with what you say, you should bring it up. I also like the idea someone already posted of getting a "set" when you go shopping for a band. Do some research and find a engagement ring & wedding band SET that you love both pieces - and get that.

I don't like my ring. Honest to god, I don't, I think its small and it doesn't look good on my finger... Would I ever tell FH that? No. Who cares what the ring looks like... Honestly, is it about the ring, or is it about the fact that you're marrying the love of your life? the material things should be the least of your worries! My vote is keep it to yourself. Its the thought that counts, and I TOTALLY disagree with the whole "entering a marriage with a lie" you didn't cheat, you didnt flirt, you didnt blow all your money on a gambling addiction, you just don't like the ring, thats hardly something your FH NEEDS to know.

Okay, this may sound wrong but you can do this..... (again people this is just my opinion).. lol

You can always say "what is this ring made of, I tend to get allergic reactions with certain metals I can only have real metal (gold or silver) and not nickel etc or my finger can get hives...

another example:

I saw this wedding band that I really liked, but it was actually silver...and i want ours to match, do you think within time we could perhaps change the color of my engagement band to a silver one so we can get rings to match in color?

regarding the diamond size:

"I ve heard from girls on wedding wire that they are going to start this tradition, where on anniversaries etc their hubby is going to add a diamond to their ring to symbolize their love growing....I think it sounds like a cool idea..what do you think"

anyway these are just examples on how id handle your situation

SO true @renay R. @shaterra its no biggie, all that matter is the love you love birds have for one another!! great choice to make.

Thanks. This is all great advice.

@RachInCali... haha those are some good points

@Renay... That def helped to hear from someone thats going thru the same thing. Thank you!

@Mrs Mcfee... That is all it is. I do love him so I guess I can suck it up too LOL!

I got engaged after a friend we ride with did. When I showed her my ring, she said, "At least your Italian has good taste. I hate my ring." I was stunned because I thought her ring was pretty. When they went to buy bans, she had everything redone to the way she likes it.

Perhaps that approach can work for you.

Hey..if your going to wear the ring the rest of your life..you can be honest without actually saying "hey i hate this ring"..there are ways of going around it...my brothers wife did that with my brother...she went around it...and they are OKAY and happy

I would just be honest with him about what you don't like. Dropping hints will just upset him. Just remind him you love him but that the ring is nothing like what you had looked at together. Ask him what made him choose that ring in particular. If there isn't really a reason then hey, he knows what to get you for Christmas already. If there was a reason that he really liked that ring then you just might grow attached to it (or maybe not I can't really see it in the picture to see how bad it is).