So worried people will bring their babies to the wedding.

Come on @tropicalfish: I highly doubt your mother was crying as if she was ready for her next round of Similac.

I've been at weddings where one screaming infant ruined the entire ceremony. Why the mother didn't get up is beyond me, but seriously, that's all I can remember about that wedding.

I'm in my mid-50s, and I have two children that started out the same way all of them do -- as infants. I remember getting invitations to events that were adult only, and if I didn't have a trusted sitter, I regretfully declined the invitation. Parenthood is amazing, but there are sacrifices to be made -- some of them social. And frankly, I wouldn't want my baby at many of the receptions I've attended -- I'm thinking of the pounding music, the open bar, the flashing lights...not an infant friendly environment.

OP, I wouldn't assume that this couple is bringing their baby just because they added the child's name when they signed your guest book. People absolutely add extra names to RSVPs (it's a common topic around here), and I doubt your friends are any different. They'll most likely add the child's name to the RSVP if they intend on bringing the baby. You can deal with it if it becomes an issue, when it becomes an issue. Please don't arbitrarily address it now.

I think you should just make sure they know it's a kid free event. Some people don't care if there name isn't on the invite. FH's brother's wife won't go ANYWHERE without her 3 year old. So she doesn't allow FBIL to go anywhere without them both. They call themselves a "unit" so if she can't come, none of them will. So there have been numberous dinners/outings they say no to because they are that family who can't have adult time. IMO, that's insanity, but people are like that. Soooo make sure you say NO KIDS and if they push the issue, tell them you're sorry you can't accomodate.

If the OP doesn't want kids at the wedding babies included as others have stated that her choice. I've nursed 3 babies in my lifetime and I will say this. If there was a place that I really wanted to go I would begin to pump and freeze milk for the sitter. Unless the mother is having separation issues because the baby is a couple months old I don't see why they wouldn't pump and freeze for a sitter. Now momma may not be able to stay as long as everyone else unless she's going to pump at the wedding and reception but I don't see what a couple of hours missed would do. Now if the guest is from out of town then this may be different. And before anyone jumps down my throat....I'm not saying that's the only way she can come its just an option I would think about if I really wanted to attend.

We're having an adult only wedding and I'm concerned that parents will bring their children anyway. We have lined up a couple of babysitters to assist if parents are ok with it.

By the way, I think it's rude to bring anyone (children included) who are NOT invited. I know it happens so I'm trying to accommodate for it and prevent any drama.

Oh my gosh with an 11 year old?! I'm trying to picture at 11 year old boy who is practically at puberty sitting on Mommy's lap. Creepy...

Why don't you just say. What are you doing with baby for the wedding? My bridesmaids are doing XXX and here is a reputable nanny source. Be upfront but not a butt about it. Offer a solution if you want them there. If not then just tell them sorry no kids and leave it there.

I didn't read all the responses, but have the parents already booked non-refundable airline tickets?

I've written this dozens of times, but we we've been invited to 5 weddings since our toddler was born. She wasn't invited to nor attended any of them, including her aunt/uncle's.

At one of them, the band so was so ridiculously loud, I would have left, if she had attended.

I started pumping, as soon as I got home from the hospital. My sister had her first baby before me and she got absolutely no sleep - was stark raving nuts about it - until she started pumping. Around here you get 6 weeks off for a natural birth and 8 weeks for a C-section.

P.S. BTW, our wedding was 21 and up. I told my cousin with the 2.5 month old, who had returned to work fulltime at 6 weeks, that she could bring the baby. They declined.

When he was 18ish months old, she wanted to bring the him to my sister's wedding. Sister said no and she and her family got all butt-hurt about it, even though she didn't invite kids to her wedding. In the e-mail to my sister she referred to him as "the little monster."

Yup, just want you want at an adult, formal, evening wedding.

I would call them if its something you really don't want. ETA: @Rita babysitters lined up already is a good idea!

Id call them and say your sorry but no babies. That's YOUR choice. If peopke think it's rude or wrong then they have the ability to not attend. I want zero kids or babies. I dont care if theyre nursing, they can find a sitter ( youve given them enough time). If they cant, then great you have 2 more open seats for someone else.

Perhaps an unpopular opinion, but I think it's rude to expect an out-of-town nursing mom to leave her infant to travel for a wedding. She's going to bring a portable pump while her baby dines on bottle breastmilk for a whole weekend?

ETA: I thought I read they booked a plane ticket. But to confirm, are they from out of town? If yes, the above stands. If not, then I think she should make other arrangements.

And as far as an infant being free, yeah, you don't have to pay for a plate; but you do have to pay for a seat. A high chair if they're able to use one, or a regular chair, to sit the baby carrier/car seat on. You can't expect a parent to hold a baby for the entire, average, 4-hour reception.

A seat at our wedding cost around $25: chair covers, 1/8 to 1/10 the cost of a centerpiece, rental décor items, floor length linens (plain ivory, but our venue only provided 4-point tablecloths, in it's package), etc.

I respect your "no babies" wish. Its your event, the guest list is 100% up to you. However, you have to expect that your friend will no longer be able to attend. You need to call them ASAP and apologize for the misunderstanding, but you saw that she RSVP'd with the baby and you are not having any children at the wedding.

So sad people think children are going to ruin their wedding.

Parents should never assume that their infant gets a pass to an Adult Only invitation. It is up to the parent to make arrangements for their children. For example, one of my daughter's is the MOH at a wedding one month after her child will be born. It is a DW and she is bringing her MIL to watch baby during the ceremony and reception. She will be breastfeeding and will excuse herself when appropriate to tend to the baby's needs. She will pump and have bottles ready if needed.

It was wrong of your invited guest to include their child on the RVSP which has now put you in an awkward position. You addressed the invitations properly and they should know that their child was not invited. Sorry you're having to deal with this situation, but I think a phone call to clear things up is in order. Otherwise you risk having a child crying during your big day.