Significant Others of Friends

Yes it is. Anyone in a relationship should be invited with their partner. It doesn't matter if you haven't met them, you should be respectful of their relationship. The significant other should also be invited by name, not "and guest".

I say only if they are serious. (dating more than 6 months) if they just started dating them and your money is tight I wouldn't, but if you have a plus one for others, it wouldn't be fair to not have one for them. So either invite them to make them happy(or feel less awkward)

but I would invite them if they are in a serious relationship

My rule for this has been if they are committed to the level of being together for a year or more, living together, or are engaged both need to be invited. A word of caution inviting new bfs and gfs can make the guest happy then but if it doesn't last then looking at wedding photos could become awkward for them. There are horror stories out there one I know personally of a woman who invited a friends new gf... Fast forward 3 months they had broken up and said gf was in jail for murder of the friends mother. She still is uncomfortable having a murderer in her pics even if she invited her to be nice.

^^^ that sounds like a good story. but thats sad said girlfriend killed her bf's mom?

people are crazy... but i totally agree with blue one 4.

like for instance FH cousin and her boyfriend will be invited they are pretty committed.

Like Emily said... etiquette says it is rude... but I think it depends on the couple (like friends with chronic dump and date kind of people) I personally am saying no to etiquette for that because pretty much everyone we're inviting is either married or 100% single. If we were to find out that they were dating people, we may consider it... but we're only having all family and 4 friends, so it's pretty intimate

I will add one one exception to the rule I have used and that has been if a guest does not know any other guests ( a few friends I have are from times in my life when other mutual friends are not in my life anymore or not close enough to invite ) then I did extend them a plus 1 to make them more comfortable. I wouldn't want to be at a wedding where I knew no one!

Jess people are crazy ! I don't let the crazies control my life but for my wedding we already have a select few that have to come so I'd like to minimize any extras! That situation was an extreme one but it was extremely sad for all involved

You cannot make up arbitrary "rules" for inviting people based on how serious you believe their relationships are. 6 months, 1 year, engaged / married only - those cut-offs are unfair to those couples who ARE serious but don't meet one of your so-called requirements for an invitation. Not everyone lives together before marriage and some people are serious after 3-4 months.

How would you feel if you had been with your bf for 7 months and you were very serious / committed but he didn't get an invite because you two didn't fit the "seriousness" rules that the bride made up? It's rude. It is not up to you to decide how serious couples are.

My rule of thumb with this is if they have been together for a significant amount of time (1 yr plus), are engaged or are living together. If they fit this criteria, regardless if we have met them, they are invited.

People will get offended if they are in one of the above situations and can't bring their SO. At this point, I know I wouldn't attend a wedding if my FH wasn't invited.

Edit: Also, if they are in one of the above relationship statuses, they may just RSVP and add that person, assuming they are invited. People aren't always familiar with invitation etiquette.

Emily to each their own. We are having an intimate wedding so I know the status of most of my guests relationships... And yes I chose to apply the same set of "rules" to each guest when it came to SOs ... If you have the budget for unlimited plus ones that great! But for me I knew I did not need to invite every person who has been on 2 dates with a guest....

I don't think anyone is right or wrong... Simply sharing how I did it and what worked for me,my FH, our wedding, and our guests. I'm not telling anyone how they have to do it although I may add my wedding planner said that how I did it is pretty standard operating procedure.

Heres how I'm handling it: some of my guest have plus ones because they have been in a relationship for awhile, and i'm friends with the s/o's.

My single or casual dating friends dont have a plus one as of right now, but this will be reevaluated when the invitations go out.

I also mentioned on the website rsvp form that space is tight so not everyone automatically got plus ones. However, I went on to say that if they need a plus one to just talk to us and we will try to accomodate.

I don't think anyone should judge anyone else's relationship on the "serious" scale. Whether it's been a month or a year, anyone who is committed to another person should have that person as their date/guest/plus one... whatever so be it. If you know they are in a relationship, engaged or not, they should both be addressed by name, not "John Doe and Guest". But that's my opinion.

I am inviting them even if I don't know them, if they are together then they should be invited that is just the way it is. I know for a fact if they invite me alone to a wedding I would not attend. If you don't care that much for the person then don't invite them at all, or just invite them alone and they will not show up. If the person is important to you and you would like them to be a part of your day then you have no choice but to invite the SO.

If they are my close friend then i should know who their s/o is if it isn't brand new cus we are all close like that. If you have never met them and your friend knows you are limited in space I don't think they wouldn't come just because their gf or bf wasn't invited. It's not like they won't know anyone else.

People like to say oh etiquette says give out a plus one but then people say weddings are for close friends and family. I say just use your own discretion. They're your friends you can talk "real talk" with them.

If they had an s/o, their s/o was invited. My husband and I were serious after our first weekend. Who am I to judge other people's relationships?

And I didn't need to know everyone's s/o - those whom I did not know I met at the wedding and it was fine.

I have lived with my fiancé for literally years. About 2 years ago I was invited to a friends wedding on my own. As were a lot of people including co-workers. While it seemed a bit odd, I understood that it was budget and also she and my fiancé barely know one another. I attended, on my own, with another good friend who was invited w/o her bf of a couple years. No one put nearly as much thought into as Emily seems to have. Do what you think is best for your personal situation and go with what you know wont be super offensive to your friend group.

Edited: My friends who are truly single, not in a relationship, will be invited w/o a guest. If they are dating someone, they will be invited with their bf/gf. We have hardly any singles and the ones that are, would NEVER be offended by being invited w/o a guest, however so I don't anticipate a problem.

All my friends are invited with a plus one, except for a choice few, who are not, but will be otherwise involved in the wedding.

We are only giving plus one's if we've met their SO. We have already had several people complain, but we are not inviting people because they are dating someone we know.

I think the main problem is people invite acquaintances and not close friends, but still call it a small intimate wedding. If it was truly intimate you would know your friend's SO.

Anyway, it is rude to invite someone without their SO whether they have been dating two months or two years.

It really depends. Etiquette says that every single guest should be allowed a plus one. However, every wedding is different and if you have 50 single guests and each of them shows up with a plus one, you could be looking at paying an extra $1500 for meals and alcohol for each of these people that you may not even know (I'm basing that off of meal and alcohol costing $30/person), so I can definitely understand not wanting to allow plus ones. If you can afford it (and your venue can handle that many people), then yes, go ahead and invite them. If you are trying to cut costs, I'd say only allow plus ones for people who you've met their significant others, or if it is serious, or if there will be no one else at the wedding that they know. Otherwise, just casually mention to single guests other people they know that will be there so they know who to expect to see there or if they need to make travel/hotel arrangements.

I just think its a way to cut costs, if they literally just started dating, no, if they are single when you send out invites and get in a relationship a month before and know other people that will be there, don't have to SO.

All I'm saying is if you only heard about the relationship from facebook, or know that this person goes from relationship to relationship, don't.

etiquette says to allow a plus one, but don't worry about if you are pressed for people/your budget doesn't allow it.

If they give you an attitude tell them your sorry that you are pressed for people.

There's few in my guest list that ARE getting a plus one because they are SERIOUS. I'm sure their SO won't mind not going to wedding for someone they don't know.

If you two are close then sure invite them.

I wouldn't listen to the negative people about how "its so rude" because honestly if your friend knows other people, it wont kill them to be away from their SO for a few hours.