RSVP yes and not show?

"People forget" - LOL! What a great excuse for missing a wedding. Sorry close friend, I forgot your wedding that I rsvp'd yes to was today. People should buy a freaking calendar. Eye roll.

I would just rsvp NO to the shower and not say another word. I wouldn't want someone like this as a friend. 3 baby showers in 5 years? In my circle, you get ONE baby shower for your first kid and MAYBE a "sprinkle" for a second one if it's a different sex (but honestly even I side eyed the one I went to last year). She's greedy and rude. I would cut her off completely.

I would not go to the shower at all. I am petty and I accept this about myself. If she can't be bothered to even say something about it then nope. And three showers in 5 years is insane. If she had one kid then not another one for 18 years may be, but nope I wouldn't be going and would wait for her to come to me.

I would just rsvp no to the baby shower and leave it at that. I'm not about giving people time when they can't bother to give any time to me. Sorry but she doesn't sound like a friend worth having.

I wouldn't attend the shower. I actually just went through this with a friend as well (she kept ignoring my messages to hangout and didn't show up to a gathering that she said she would with no explanation, but expected me to come to her shower. She got mad when I didn't come and doesn't talk now, but she's always been the "user" type.) Or if you go I would just take diapers, but I seriously wouldn't go.

Ah! I posted this last night before bed (slightly tipsy!) and just remembered that I had posted. You guys are great! To answer a couple questions- most of the no shows were friends of the parents-in-law, since they paid for the venue. It was 16 no shows out of 75ish guests. Which kinda blows. I'm in Utah- which is notorious for the shitty (free!) church gym "wedding"... which nobody ever RSVPs to and people bring whoever they want. So it's common for our area, but it was still a little shocking. :/

@Asta- I haven't, because I didn't know if that would be weird/rude/whatever else, which is why I posted this. She never said anything and then poof- e-vite through Facebook for the baby shower. (Also, I didn't notice this until I looked a little further. It's THIS SATURDAY and I got the invite YESTERDAY afternoon.)

Ugh, I feel you. We had 19 no-shows. I knew the reasons for about half of the people but there were about 9 that didn't give a reason and I never asked.

As far as the baby shower goes, I would decline.

1) THREE baby showers is way too extra.

2) She didn't ever ask about the wedding? What a friend. Nope.

I wouldn't mention it. That totally sucks and it would impact my relationship with the person. I'm not sure how a friend can not show up, not give you a reason, and not ask about how it went. Definitely annoying!

We only had two no shows, I honestly didn't notice until I saw her name come across facebook. She was a friend of H's, so he said he noticed that night and was disappointed. He isn't going to say anything though, because he was like.. "what do you say? hey, i noticed you weren't at my wedding and you said you would be."

I'm sorry but I'm petty......I just wouldn't RSVP or go. If she were your close friend she would have apologized for not coming, sent a card or contacted you directly. I don't think there's a point in talking to her about it. She knows what she did. 16 people is a lot for no shows. Imagine if you paid $100 per person for food and drinks, that equates to a lot of wasted money. I understand things come up, but I think it's rude to just not acknowledge it and not send a card.

If you say to her, "So sorry you missed the wedding! We really wish you could have been there," She'd probably ignore it and go into some anecdote or occurrence about herself, life, baby, or how excited she is for___or how busy she is because____

Because friends like that only have one subject on their minds, themselves.

I have a friend like that...everything is about her All The Time. Ad nauseam. She never showed to my wedding either even though she was excited about it and planned for it. This friend always talks about what's going on in her life and will hardly ask a question about mine. If this describes your friend, back away slowly and count her as a back burner friend. She'll slowly extricate herself from your like unless you make the effort to make it all about her all the time.

I would RSVP no to her baby shower, and show up empty handed...and eat all the food. LOL!!!! Don't take it too seriously.

So she RSVP'd yes, didn't show and didn't apologize or say anything! Then sent you an invitation to a baby shower! She basically said you're not worth her time or energy, but she should be worth yours. I would skip that baby shower and post a pic online of myself sitting at home watching TV!

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THIS WOULD BE A FRIENDSHIP ENDER. if someone didn't consider the fact that I spent $100-200 on their plate of food for them and a date because I wanted them there and they couldn't bother to show up? I'd be FUMING and insulted. There are circumstances where it is ok to no show to a wedding (but PLEASE contact the bride so she doesn't think you're just ditching her on her wedding day!) Death in family, sickness, hospital, emergency are acceptable reasons to no show, but have the courtesy to let someone know. either before or shortly after because like I said if you just blew me off like that, and I didn't hear from you, we'd be done as friends.

At this point, I would not bother saying anything. I would go to the shower and take some diapers and wipes (things that people need for ALL babies). I wouldn't stoop to her level. Something may have happened and she may be embarrassed about it.

I don't think it is greedy to have a shower for a 3rd, 4th, 5th and so on. This person may not be asking for staple items. I know I didn't for my second child who is not much younger than my first. But things like diapers and wipes aren't reusable and I know that I was very appreciative of those that came to my second shower. I don't think people should judge and automatically assume that this person is greedy for having a shower.

Yeah in my area we have sprinkles for second + babies. I dont mind going. They usually just ask for diapers, wipes maybe some new clothes. Its nice to have new stuff for your new baby so I dont mind going.

Actually, I would call her and bring it up. I would tell her how disappointed I was to not see her at the wedding and say I hope everything is okay. Also that's super gift grabby and gross about the baby shower. Third in 5 years? So tacky. Don't attend. Or attend and don't bring a gift! Ha

We had 30 or so RSVP yes and then no show. Out of 95 people.