Rehearsal Dinner, Who to invite and who can be left out.....

This is from Emily Post:

Who is invited?

The guest list at a rehearsal dinner should include the members of the wedding party and their spouses, fiancé(e)s, or live-in partners; the officiant and his or her spouse or partner; the parents, stepparents, and grandparents of the bride and groom; and any siblings of the bride and groom who are not in the wedding party. If single members of the wedding party were invited to bring a date to the wedding, then it's kind to include the date at the rehearsal dinner. Any children of the bride and groom from a previous marriage are invited, unless they are too young. Parents of young attendants, such as a flower girl or ring bearer, are also included.

http://www.emilypost.com/weddings/planning-your-wedding/460-the-rehearsal-dinner

I have 64 on mine. All out of town guests(I was told this was proper), the BP(which are mostly siblings) and their families, then our grandparents, parents, etc. It would be MUCH smaller if I didn't have to include OOT's. We are not paying for it, but I'm having a rough time trying to find a space that is large enough that serves good food! FMIL told me to pick the place.

Yep, what Angelina said. We are also including our readers, but that only brings us up to 24 people. If it were any higher than that, we wouldn't have them, just wedding party, parents, and significant others plus us and the officiant.

Thanks guys This actually helps a lot

We are including bridal party & +1s, immediate family, grandparents, aunts and cousins ~50 people. If we included out of town guests it would be pretty much the entire wedding so we aren't going there.

We are only having our WP there SO, and parents

We are only having our WP there SO, and parents

You know, point taken, My guest list is 130, if I invite all 64 people that's half my wedding! I just am afraid that FH's family will take it as an insult. SO glad someone else posted a worry about this!

I'm only having the people in the wedding party, my mom & dad, FI mom & dad, and anyone helping out on the big day. It's rehearsal dinner for people who are there rehearsing to be in your wedding or to help you out! I'm not inviting people outside of who I listed since I've already paid for their dinner once (Saturday evening wedding)

Just the wedding party +1's, parents, grandparents, my god parents (godmom day of cooridinator and god dad reader), and mother of flower girl. Total 30 people.

I'm inviting anyone who actually has to be at the rehearsal (because, really, that's the point of this dinner), any SO's of those people, and immediate family. Ours will be about 30, maybe less. You are already throwing a fabulous party the next day, don't make this one overly complicated!

We kept it very small. Our wedding is only 68people total so if we invited everyone we'd like it would almost be like a 2nd wedding. But we are having our bridal party and their spouses, our parents, and our pastor and his wife. Total about 20 people.

We are inviting WP and significant others, parents, grandparents and OOT guests. FH's family is all from out of state and they had invited us to their rehearsal dinners so it would be rude for us not to invite them. Plus I want him to spend as much time with all of them as possible since he only see's them 1 out of every 2 or 3 years. We have 70 people coming

We're having our BP, my son (who is walking me down the aisle), and the mother's of the RB and FG. Total of 11 people.

In my culture, and at Cate's RD, everyone mentioned by Emily Post was invited. Typically, in our culture, as a way to thank your OOT guests for flying in for a wedding, OOT guests are invited to the RD. We consider it part of being a good host.

Cate's ILs not only included the OOT guests after the rehearsal on Thursday night, but also hosted a cocktail party on Friday night, for the new arrivals who flew in on Friday, with a "Welcome to Philly" theme where the Mendenhall served hoagies, cheese steaks, sausage and pepper sandwiches and salads. When someone flies in from Hawaii, it's a good idea to give them a warm welcome.

I think this is one of those "Is it your norm?" situations.

I was a bridesmaid at my friend's wedding back in November. It was in GA and I live in NJ. A lot of people at her wedding were from out of state because the bride and groom met in college, so she's from New Jersey and he's from Louisiana. Her rehearsal included her bridal party, her parents, and my boyfriend, who had come down for the wedding with me. (She invited him, feeling that it would be rude not to since he came with me and didn't know anyone else in the area, so would be confined to the hotel alone while I took the car to go to the rehearsal & dinner.) None of the other OOT guests were invited.

Hey, heres the new question, what about Siblings of the Flowergirls??

I'm not really having one. We're going to probably rent a big hotel room, order pizza, play video games with the bridal party. Maybe have a brunch with our parents, grandparents, siblings.

Siblings of the Flower Girl? Hmm....now that is a good question. I would vote yes, but I tend to be super inclusive on these type of ocassions because I never want to hurt feelings.

Thanks Angelina! We were just talking about this the other day while we tried to come up with our budget for the dinner. That was really helpful!