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Aspen
Savvy July 2021

Photos Missed! Help

Aspen, on July 29, 2021 at 3:42 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 13
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Hello! So I’m in a bit of a pickle. I got married just over two weeks ago. Yay!! We just got back from our honeymoon, and my mom said she was waiting until we were back to bring this up, but, the family is upset that some photos were missed. Namely a shot of just me and my grandmother, who bought my dress. That is the main one but I know my aunt wants a solo one with me as well that she didn’t get.


Looking back, I did feel rushed by our photographers and I’m so sad coming to the realization that some family members were left out of photos. We hired them because they are close family friends, but I’m so disappointed realizing that they didn’t stick to the list I gave them.
My mom has apparently already spoken with one of photographers and she said that if I want to get all dressed up again she would come and take those make up shots for free. But, because some family members are feeling upset with her about this, I’m wondering if we should consider going with someone else? If I’m going to put on my dress and do full hair and makeup again, I don’t want to have family tension.
What would you do? Take her up on the offer to make it right for free but maybe have your grandmother and mom be not fully comfortable? Or pay to use someone else and potentially hurt the original photographers feelings?
Thank you for any help!!

13 Comments

Latest activity by Maria, on December 29, 2021 at 7:17 AM
  • Yasmine
    Master October 2020
    Yasmine ·
    • Flag
    I would take her up on her offer and get the free pictures, especially if the photographer is actually good. I understand that they're upset it was missed but the photographer is trying to make it right so I don't see why there would be any tension. Especially if it was a simple mistake.
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  • Aspen
    Savvy July 2021
    Aspen ·
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    Thank you!!
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  • Melle
    Legend June 2019
    Melle ·
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    I would do the free photos too!!

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  • Jacks
    Champion November 2054
    Jacks ·
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    I would be gracious and take them up on their offer. You get to wear all your wedding attire one more time, and it makes a good story of how important these special people are to you.

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  • Aspen
    Savvy July 2021
    Aspen ·
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    View Quoted Comment
    Thank you!
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  • Jacks
    Champion November 2054
    Jacks ·
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    Congrats on your marriage!

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  • Expert June 2021
    ·
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    I sadly had this happen as well. Even with my well detailed to the names I wanted photos with we still missed a family photo with my great aunt. She was hardly covered in the wedding maybe 4 total and they were just dancing pictures or her at the table. She was the one who told me about a week after before I even got my pictures back. I was hoping she was wrong but when I went through the pictures she wasn’t in any of our family shoots and she’s been apart of my life since I was born. And I was the flower girl in her wedding. I got her a gift and card to show my appreciation to her and for opening her hone for us to use to do hair and makeup and getting ready. It still doesn’t feel good enough. So I have also reached out to the photography team about a reshoot. We are thinking maybe next year we can do it as things are so hectic right now. But I definitely know what you’re feeling. I would do the reshoot so you can have those photos and memories and have a peace of mind. We also want a reshoot just because we got rained in and couldn’t utilize the outdoor garden space. We'll see who wants to get all dolled up again for reshoots and go from there.
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  • Kari
    Master May 2020
    Kari ·
    • Flag

    Hiring family friends to shoot your wedding was mistake number one. Always vet your vendors fully, and anticipate that hiring non-professionals is going to result in non-professional results. Even if you know someone who is a pro, you need to vet them the same as you would any other vendor to make sure they are the right fit for what you want.

    Also even if you give a shot list to your photographers it is still your responsibility to make sure portraits include all the people you want - you know who your guests are, your photographers do not. They have zero idea who bought your dress or what your grandmother looks like, so you need to be really intentional about photographs with certain people. There is also a reasonable amount of requests to make; but if you have an extensive list of shots you would like and you prioritize them all the same, some will inevitably get missed.

    Basically, without knowing further details its difficult to fault the photographers in this situation. Do you like the quality of the photographs you were given? If so, I would lean towards having the same photographers reshoot those portraits for free. It will cost you the least amount of money to redo, and the editing and shooting style will match those of your other photos from your wedding, and therefore be easier to integrate into a wedding photo album or collage.

    If you are unhappy with the photos in general - not just that some shots were missed - then I would consider hiring a different photographer. Do keep in mind that the photos shot by someone else are likely to have a slightly different look and feel than the ones already done. Even if you do your hair and makeup the same, there will be some discrepancies (regardless of photographer you pick) and these might be more obvious with a different photographers style than if you use the same photographer.

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  • Aspen
    Savvy July 2021
    Aspen ·
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    I’m so sorry this happened to you. Thank you for sharing and good luck with your reshoot!
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  • Aspen
    Savvy July 2021
    Aspen ·
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    Thank you for your response. Just to clarify a few things:


    - they are professional photographers and our family has used them before for other events and this is the first time we’ve had a problem, so it came as a surprise. - they do know who my grandmother is, it is a very small family
    I appreciate your perspective on how a different photographer’s style of photos will be different and yes I think I will stick with them for that reason.
    I do just want to say that words can hurt and telling someone you don’t know, who is already upset about a situation and asking for advice “this was your first mistake” is insensitive. I can’t change the past and I do love them as family. I was just looking for advice on how to move forward now that what’s done is done.



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  • Aspen
    Savvy July 2021
    Aspen ·
    • Flag
    Thank you everyone for your thoughtful responses and your congratulations! I appreciate everyone’s time and advice. I am going to try to make arrangements with my photographer for some makeup shots later in the summer. I’m sure it will be great Smiley smile
    • Reply
  • Kari
    Master May 2020
    Kari ·
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    To clarify, it's not necessarily wrong to hire people you know, just important to screen them the same way you would any other pro and hold them to the same standards throughout the selection process. The additional information you provided in your response was helpful for getting a better picture of the whole situation. If your family has hired them for events in the past and has a professional working relationship with them, then it totally makes sense that you would consider them for your wedding, and I can see why you would be surprised that they missed those shots. I'm really sorry you are disappointed by the outcome and may have to go through the hassle of a reshoot.

    Have you been able to speak with the photographers directly, or is the information you are relaying coming through your mom? If you haven't chatted with them, I'd cut out the middle woman and have a conversation with the photographers yourself - it will give you a better sense of how they feel about the situation, accommodating a second shoot, etc. I feel like you will be able to get a better sense of a genuine "we're truly sorry, our bad, we want to make it right" vs "sure we will do a reshoot but this is a giant PITA" vibe, which might help you feel a little more confident about investing time and money into a reshoot. If you love the rest of your photos and otherwise have no complaints with how they handled your wedding, then a reshoot seems like the best option here.

    Also, did you get your full set of photos back? Two weeks is an unusually quick turnaround, so its possible there are some photos you didn't see (but being family friends and all I could see them editing your whole wedding sooner than they would a typical client). Its also unlikely they would offer a reshoot if they had usable shots that just didn't make it into the final edit they sent you. I think speaking with the photographers directly should happen before you do a reshoot regardless!

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  • Maria
    Just Said Yes November 2021
    Maria ·
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    Hellpo can anyone help
    Our photographer was late and missed the ceremony
    Can we restage it?
    • Reply

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