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AsYouWish
Super October 2016

People who rsvp yes and then don't show up

AsYouWish, on October 18, 2016 at 11:23 AM Posted in Community Conversations 0 44

I am just curious as to what the most outrageous reason was as to why they rsvped yes to your wedding and then didn't show up. I had my wedding this past Saturday. A girl I had been friends with since I was 2 rsvped yes for 3 people and they didn't show up... why you ask? She decided to have a yard sale.

44 Comments

Latest activity by Kari, on May 6, 2019 at 6:44 PM
  • T
    Expert October 2016
    Taylor-brooke ·
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    I read on other boards this is a very rude thing to do.

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  • T
    Expert October 2016
    Taylor-brooke ·
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    I would seriously question the friendship in this case.

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  • Judi
    VIP June 2017
    Judi ·
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    Wow thats rough! at my first wedding my very best friend didn't come because her bfs cousin was being discharged from the hospital for a non emergency admission and she wanted to be there so the family thought she was serious about the bf (they broke up weeks earlier and she's still one of my closest friends)

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  • Celia Milton
    Celia Milton ·
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    I'd be sending them a bill.

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  • T
    Expert October 2016
    Taylor-brooke ·
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    It was actually on the news in my area a few years ago of a bride that sent a bill for 75 dollars to everyone who RSVP then didn't show up.

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  • MrsSki
    Master April 2017
    MrsSki ·
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    I don't have a story like that (yet?), but I just wanted to say that's truly awful of your friend. If it was a medical emergency or something similar, that would be one thing, but a yard sale?! I'm not sure I could still be friends with her. So hurtful!

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  • Mrs.Oot2017
    Dedicated September 2017
    Mrs.Oot2017 ·
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    Very rude. Sorry that you had to deal with this, not only did she take up someone's spot- but it cost you financially.

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  • SageTree
    Super July 2017
    SageTree ·
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    I did this once. I RSVP'd yes to a wedding.

    I got violently ill that morning. 102 fever, and I had to go to the hospital.

    I felt horrible about it. I later texted my friend... the next day... and let him know how sorry I was, and how I had pneumonia, and sent my gift in the mail. He still was very angry with me, haven't been friends since.

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  • KYbride
    Expert September 2016
    KYbride ·
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    We had 23 people RSVP yes and then not show. We heard from about 7 of them as to why they didn't come (the children were sick), so there's no hard feelings there. However... I had a friend who said she would quit her job if her boss didn't give her the day off in order to be at the wedding. Instead of quitting her job, she was in a dance performance that had been planned for months and still hasn't told me why she didn't come. Like I obviously know that's where she was because there's pictures of her dancing on stage... I'm not dumb. We still haven't heard from the other 16 since they sent their RSVP cards in...

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  • Emily
    Expert July 2017
    Emily ·
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    I already know we'll have at least 3 different people do this (all of which I could name right now). I'll reserve the seats for them anyway assuming they RSVP yes, and our food will be buffet style so we should be okay. It's definitely annoying though. If you don't plan on coming and have to create a lame excuse not to come, just do us all a favor and RSVP no.

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  • Ms. Tee
    Super April 2017
    Ms. Tee ·
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    This is one of those things that gets under my skin. Like people are paying for you to be there, have some type of decency to call or make it a best attempt to go. I have been to a wedding where I left before the reception started because 1. cocktail hour was outside in late august and 2. I was 8 months pregnant standing around outside. It wasn't looking good.

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  • T
    Expert October 2016
    Taylor-brooke ·
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    I did this once a few months ago. A high school friend invited me to her wedding. She didn't have invites she just told people about it and I took the day off and then realized she never gave me the address right as I was leaving. I messaged her and didn't hear back until hours after the reception ended.

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  • JRA12216
    Expert December 2016
    JRA12216 ·
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    One of my pet peeves is when someone RSVPs to anything and then doesn't go. My FH tries to back out of things last minute sometimes and I have to really explain to him why he can't do that. Ultimately he ends up realizing how it affects the host, so he swallows his pride and goes. He just doesn't get that once you say yes, you cost someone money. On the other hand, if someone really does get violently ill and last minute can't come... I would probably be thankful that they stayed home and spared the rest of the guests catching whatever bug they had. Obviously life happens... but a yard sale? Well that is just ridiculous in my opinion!

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  • AlmostMrsCorcino
    Super October 2016
    AlmostMrsCorcino ·
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    I dont like them any more then ppl who dont rsvp at all and show up...

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  • ajpeacockk
    Super January 2017
    ajpeacockk ·
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    No offense to anyone but I'm praying some people who are RSVPing dont come.. Lol

    But our food isn't nearly as expensive and I just am hoping FH's side doesn't show up because when they show up to weddings they bring friends and wedding crashers out the wazzoo

    I'd rather you RSVP and not show then not RSVP and show. ugh

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  • kimmyinjapan
    VIP September 2016
    kimmyinjapan ·
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    I had two people not come because their daughter was close to delivering her baby and they didn't want to risk it, then I had someone else with her boyfriend who already said they would be missing the ceremony because of work (we got married at 730) and then didn't end up coming for the reception either.

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  • P
    VIP October 2017
    P ·
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    I end up with so much anxiety about this because of my job. We're always traveling for trial and preparing for trial and you never know which ones are going to go (taking up weeks of your life) or settle (leaving you totally free as a bird) far enough in advance. Last year I RSVP'd no to a wedding I ended up being able to make. Obviously I didn't go, but I did make it clear to the bride why I RSVP'd no and that I was upset to miss it. This year I RSVP'd yes to a wedding, almost had to call and cancel, but held off and thankfully I'll be able to go. It sucks on both sides but you have to make an effort and you have to communicate both your situations and your intentions clearly to avoid confusion and hurt feelings. This nonsense about a yard sale? Just plain rude.

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  • Kaylie
    Master May 2016
    Kaylie ·
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    4 of DH's friends did this and he hasn't spoke to or heard from 3 of them. One we ran into at a picnic and he went out of his way to apologize, he didn't avoid us which was appreciated. His excuse was that he's been going through some shit and was in a really bad place and wasn't feeling up to it and didn't know how to tell DH. I appreciated his honesty, at least I'm hoping he was honest. The other 3 can go f$$$ themselves. I didn't even want to invite them in the first place.

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  • Wifin'
    Super March 2017
    Wifin' ·
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    I would've been really upset with my "Friend" . This is my biggest fear.. the people I really want or expect to be there not showing up.

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  • SoonToBeDames
    Expert November 2016
    SoonToBeDames ·
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    This isn't as bad, but I've had a few people say how excited they are for the wedding after receiving the STDs, and mention it multiple times since then, but then not RSVP. Then when we followed up, they say they can't make it. The worst part is that it's for stuff they knew was occurring that day when they received the STD. Why not just say, from the get go, "Oh no! We have x event that day." rather than BSing us about coming...and avoiding telling us the truth until we follow up 4 times. Frustrating. I 100% understand that life happens, events occur, and you can't attend - just be honest.

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