People who rsvp yes and then don't show up

Really a yard sale???? That's not something you plan last minute she was never coming and never had the guts to say no

I mean, I am honestly expecting people who RSVPed yes to not show up, but I just know a lot of flaky people. I am trying to be positive and just think of it as a wedding cost, but I am sure I am going to be a lot more annoyed the day after haha

@STBD ya those people are the worst, like, I think since we thought you were important enough to join us on our special day, the least we deserve is a a direct no

Wow I hope to never have this happen but I guess you just never know. How rude to RSVP to a wedding then not bother to show. Some of the excuses are even worse. I get sometimes things happen last minute but some of these reasons are lame.

My wedding is Saturday and I'm gonna be so annoyed if this happens, haha

Well well well...

I lost my babysitter

I didn't feel like showing up.

I forgot it was this month.

This is really a great demonstration of the importance of a well culled list of people who would move heaven and earth to be with you instead of those who are so mildly attached to you that when the day comes they feel like a choice between binge watching Mad Men, having a garage sale or your wedding is a toss up. Sure, there are legit excuses, and those people will probably send an apology and a gift. But seriously, when the guest list is 400, how compelled are those last 200 to actually show up?

Everyone likes to think they have giant groups of people who love them, but in most cases, it's self flattery. And at expensive per plate costs (and whatever is being charged, it usually feels like a stretch), that's expensive egotism.

And if you know right now who won't show up?

Don't invite them.

So would it be rude to write on the RSVP card, "please indicate whether you are or are not coming, not whether you would *like* to come"? haha

That's unbelievable. They BEST be sending you a gift from their party of 3 ASAP. Rude

I guess since we are four days out, I am in total IDGAF mode. You don't want to come? Okay cool. My sense of calm has been way unsettling the past couple days. FHs sister is a bridesmaid and is coming down with some kind of cold or sinus something so her and FBIL don't know that they're gonna be able to make it. FBIL is also a groomsman and their son is our ring bearer. And like someone mentioned above, I can pretty much pinpoint those that rsvpd yes and won't end up showing. Oh well.

Ceclia has a great point - our guest list isn't finalized yet but I am constantly crossing people off. I really want this to be my nearest and dearest and if you can't make time for me currently then you don't need to be there for this.

Example: I have been trying to make plans with a "friend" and keep getting blown off with terrible excuses. Off the list you go - one less person to host.

Never be afraid of the red pen!

My aunt texted me the day before the wedding and said "call your caterer and tell them to drop two people from your count. Even if they gave you a deadline my experience in the food service/catering world has told me most times they will drop the count even if it's past the deadline" yeah... They can't drop the count the day before the wedding when the bill had already been paid in full, but ok. I did not bother responding.

My DH niece and her BF didn't show up. On the way over to her dad's house so they could carpool down they stopped at Tims. She went in, ordered and he texted her that they were done and left her there. Her dad had RSVPd for them as daughters name and piece of shit. Guess he was right.

Legitimate reasons for not coming is totally acceptable in my mind. Like being deathly ill or car not starting. Anything the person can't control is okay. But a yard sale? That is an awful reason!

We also had about 15-20 people do this. Almost everyone said they either ended up having to work, traffic was bad or, I love this, they were too tired from having celebrated the fourth of July (our wedding was the weekend after). The one that really got to me though was a "friend" who first claimed she didn't get an invite so, I sent another. Then she said she ended up having to work. Problem is, I know someone else who works at the same place and did work that day. They told me she did not work.

I second (or third) Celia. We narrowed down our list a lot and out of our 60 guests, we had 0 no-shows (only one missed the ceremony because of a long drive in the morning).

A yard sale? Rude. Very rude.

At my first wedding, a close college friend RSVP'd yes which was great.

The day before the wedding she called me and begged me wanting to bring a guest -- a girl who talked bad about me & then FH, would tell him I cheated on him, tell me he cheated on me .... she was just a very rude person . Always talking bad about people. We weren't friends at all. But it was the day before my wedding , they would travel together across the state & I didn't really care so I said sure bring her.

They arrived in town and stayed at a local hotel.

The day of my wedding we got a half an inch of snow. Nothing big, nothing huge.

My close friend called me that morning and said due to the blizzard that came in the night before, they couldn't leave the hotel.

Their hotel was across the street from the church where I was getting married. We all went to college in NY they are used to snow

Needless to say I still don't talk to either of them

Ugh, this is why I intentionally gave our venue a lowball number - we can revise it upward a few days before, and the venue will prep extra places and food on the day of the wedding for last-minute additions and uninvited +1s anyways, so everybody will be properly hosted, don't freak out.

But we're 90% sure that FH's stepbrother, my cousin, and both their families will cancel on us at the last minute (both families have a history of this). By giving an initial lower number, we're not locked into paying for their plates when they cancel.

Yeah she had posted the day before about having a yard sale on fb and I didn't say anything about the wedding because I figured she might have been posting for her grandmother. And then the day of she posted it again saying she was having a yard sale. So at that point I knew she wasn't coming but I still hoped she would. But she didn't of course. So just like that she ended our friendship of 23 years. I'm sorry some of you have dealt with this too. It's awful.

We had a few people RSVP yes and then not show up. One was my cousin who's in the Navy and had his leave cut short (understandable), one was a friend of my husband's who saw us a few days later and literally said "I'm so sorry, I have no excuse" and handed us a card with cash (at this point we were no longer annoyed and just thought it was kind of funny). And then there were others that didn't show up and didn't offer an explanation and we didn't ask - at the end of the day, we got married and it was an awesome time so it's their loss that they decided not to show up.

We didn't have anyone say yes and not show up that gave us a reason. We had MANY not show up. Most I would guess because of hurricane Matthew, however, not all of them. Probably 30 didn't come, but about 10 extras came...