O'dourves- yay or nay?

And no, that is not what CC's are for. That's what 2d jobs, gigs, shopping and dining out moratorium, slashing cable tv and cutting guest lists are for.

If alcohol is being served you absolutely need food.

For the record, I have no credit card debt. I was joking. But half serious. Cause I am a wedding photographer, and I have people not budget their weddings right all time and end up putting their final payments on their cards.

He can't possibly get a part time job to help pay? Honestly that's would annoy me. Even when I was in college full time, I worked part time. Hell, I worked full time and did full time coursework, when I was talking online classes.

I'm not going to fund My entire wedding myself. That's just not happening.

Also, you don't HAVE to have 100 people. I'd change venues if I needed to invite that many people. I'm not inviting people just to meet a guest count minimum.

I'm always a bit skeptical when I hear someone in school full time can't work. I've known people in medical school, law school, engineering and architecture programs that managed to work a bit.

Surely there's something he could do in the next year and a half that would bring in enough income to help with the wedding.

Your fiance's immediate family is 80% of your guest list? You do realize that "immediate" family means only parents, siblings, and your own children if you have them? Even if your families are both of the 20 and counting variety, and every one of them is married, it's hard to see how you get up to 100 people.

I hadn't thought too hard about this o'dourves, and when I did take a peak at that menu, I was kind of surprised just cheese and crackers were so much $. Like as much as passed selections. In my mind I thought we'd pay a couple hundred for a cheese/cracker/fruit tray and be done with it. But they do those trays separately, and they're priced a lot higher than I thought. It's kind of my fault for not asking for those specific prices right away, and just looking at the buffet/bar pricing when we decided on the venue.

You should have at least some hors d'oeuvres. Drinking + empty stomach= bad idea.

Oh, I always thought grandparents were immediate family too? I always include them in immediate family photos, whoops . We have a lot of divorces and half siblings scattered about.

Again, what if someone is lactose intolerant? What if someone is allergic to strawberries? Now that person can’t eat anything on either tray..

Lol I like your spelling of hors d'oeuvres

Do people really pay $1600 on just o'dourves at medium-end venues? No wonder everyone is broke by the time they book me, haha. I had no idea.

We're having 100 people. I didn't think that I guess my half siblings make up quite a bit of the list too. He just has so many nieces/nephews, it always seems like his family is larger.

Your use of “hahaha” after everything is interesting. How old are you?

Cheese = 10-15.00 Per pound, which annoys me cause I love cheese. Platters like hummus and pitas, bruscetta, guac; those might be cheaper.....

Why can't he work at all? I have married dozens of people in all kinds of disciplines of academics and they all worked. I did my own graduate degrees while running a business and many people here are doing both.

Suppose you count grandparents, and all four of them are divorced and remarried. And both parents are divorced and remarried. That's a total of 12. And every one of his siblings is married. In order to have 100 guests, and 80% are his immediate family, we're talking about his having 34 siblings. Really? Even including half siblings, that seems unlikely.

Part of the issue seems to be all the nieces and nephews. They are not actually immediate family. Many people here have child-free weddings to reduce the guest list.

And regarding above comments, it's not that uncommon that people in school cannot work. I'm in graduate school right now, and there is a stipulation in the funding that if we take any external employment, we lose our meager living stipend.

Cheese is really expensive, and fresh fruit tends to be as well. Plus they can be preparation-heavy - lots of cubing and washing and chopping. Talk to your venue and see what they can do for you. I've learned that they're often willing to work with what you can afford. See if you can get them to do a lower cost alternative during cocktail hour.

If they are going broke over the wedding, they're doing it wrong.

Nas, same. Our first venue choice was barely affordable, but only if we did a Monday wedding..it’s frustrating because that venue was gorgeous, but the catering alone for 35 guests was just around $5k.