NWR: but did you have to compromise with animals?

When we lived on fh's family ranch, we had a Newfie. She absolutely loved the freedom and preferred sleeping in the barn. We would have to almost force her to come inside at night, and after losing 2 windows and a door (and paying hefty vet bills for stitches) b/c of her escape attempts, she became a 100% outside dog unless she asked to come in. She never asked. She slept with the cattle and watched over my kids during the day. She's still on the ranch with fh's cousin, since moving her across the country to an apt would have been cruel.

No, no compromise here. I have indoor cats and want an indoor dog. FH doesn't like animals in the house. I told him long ago that I don't agree with throwing a house pet outdoors, nor would I agree to getting a dog that stayed out 24/7. It was a point that was a deal breaker for me, but not something he had any issues letting me have my way about, since there really isn't any middle ground.

On the upside, FH is as much of an animal lover as I am, and since we've been together, his outdoor cat has turned into an indoor/outdoor cat, lol.

@Ghostly Smile, I think that's how's FH dog would feel of we tried to bring her in. She seems really happy. She is with a bunch of barn cats. All I wanted was advice on how to convince FH and see if anybody had any tips. But I guess not.

If I was your neighbor I would have reported you and your FH. That is cruelty in my eyes and in certain states as well especially during weather temperatures. What's the point of having a dog or cat then? They are our companions and do not deserve to be outside. I would NEVER be with someone who looks at animals that way. Thankfully FH and I are both vegans so we respect all animals especially those labeled companions. FH does not want dogs but we both have cats. I sometimes go back and forth about adopting an older dog and so does he, but as of right now our paw-babies will be cats. I could not be with someone who treats their paw-babies that way. It isn't right.

I can see not wanting the animals in your bed but I don't think there is any justification for keeping an animal outside 24/7.

Could you start out slow? Start bringing your cat over to his place for a couple hours at a time so he can get used to the idea of pets living in the house.

My FH grew up near farms. Dogs were only working animals....cats, well, they were rodents who killed your chickens so you needed to kill them before they killed your food. He didn't even KNOW cats were pets until he left his religious cult community. Now he knows better.

Thankfully I'm not a cat person...because FH still can't stand cats and still somewhat thinks of them as dirty rodents. However, I have to give him major props for compromising on our dog. He never wanted an indoor dog. Never wanted a little dog. Thankfully, the little dogs I love (Jack Russell Terriers) he had seen working on farms and thought were cool. It really truly took a good 8 months before FH started bonding with our dog. He never treated our dog badly, just wouldn't show him much affection besides the occasional pet here and there. Now I catch them cuddling all the time...and you can tell FH gets excited to see the dog when he gets home.

Just start slow and give it time. He'll eventually get used to it and come to appreciate the benefits of co-habitating with a pet.

Mrs Shell,

No one gave you hate about anything, posters are expressing their personal experiences and honest opinions on pet care. It's an open forum, you should take it all in because the majority of people here are concerned for all animal welfare including your FH's dog.

May I ask, how old are you and your FH? It may be irrelevant but I am curious.

ETA, I did give you advice on getting positive vet articles and animal humane association articles on pet care including the benefits of indoor living for pets. You'll also find articles on how to introduce pets to people who are not use to them/didn't grow up with them. I think you should look into this.

It really pisses me the fuck off to no end when people get dogs to leave them outside. Please tell your fh to give his dog to a family that will love it the way it deserves to be loved. Dogs are the absolute most amazing, smart, sweet, and loving animals and they are family. Not fucking lawn ornaments.

No. I don't have to compromise. We have a cat and a dog and we will get one more or more dogs after we get married. I want all the dogs. In my house. In my bed. On my couch. Licking my face. Because that's what dogs are for.

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It is cruel IMO to leave an animal outside in the cold/extreme heat or in your garage. Pets are meant to be a part of the family. If they aren't allowed inside at all you should not own them. Let someone else give them a better life. Not allowing of pets in the house would be a hard deal breaker for me.

I couldn't pick just one.....

Mrs.Shell, I'm actually a butcher...and meat sales woman, so no office job here! I don't use "cuz" either.

Goodbye!

Certainly tough and my two chihuahuas are something I'd never compromise on. Also, I live in a cold state so would never imagine an outdoor dog. But, people CAN compromise. My fiance likes to believe he's big and tough and has repeatedly said "anything under 50lbs is not a real dog" jokingly and believed all dogs should live outside as his pits used to growing up. Now, 3 years later, he buys matching sweaters for our chihuahuas and cuddles in bed with them, lol! He knew how important it was to me, we did clash a bit, but now he's learned to love them. Good luck girlie

Melissa is 100% correct, I couldn't agree more. If a dog is raised to live only outside it doesn't know any better. They're creatures of habit, so suddenly coming inside to live will probably be very stressful to a dog. Doesn't make it right. Your FH's current dog will probably never know the luxury of living comfortably with its family, but that doesn't mean you should allow any future dogs the same life.

Don't get any more animals for sure. I would 100% not be with a guy that kept a dog outside all the time. No way.

I'm not touching the whole inside-outside dog thing, other than I'm a city girl who grew up with dogs in her bed whereas my brother-in-law (sister's husband) is like yours - grew up on a farm with outside farm dogs. I couldn't do it, but that's because i like puppy snuggles.

So, to answer your question - you never know. I came into our relationship with a dog that my husband hates, but he tolerates because of me. And he always said that once she died, we'd have no more dogs (which made me sad).

HOWEVER, one day, my husband (then fiance) found a homeless, starving, flea and worm-ridded pit bull puppy and brought him home. The plan was to keep him 2 days until the shelter opened. However, he fell in love and our pittie has been with us for almost 4 years now (he's my avatar). My husband, a former cat person turned into a dog person almost overnight. He now understands how wonderful dogs can be, and we both agree that we'll continue to have pit bulls or Staffordshire terriers.

Miracles can happen with the right dog. :-)

Gonna stand up for FH here. There are dogs that LIKE the outdoors and refuse to go indoors and there are people who spend more time outdoors than indoors. Just because a pet is outdoors or in a garage for bad weather does not make it animal cruelty. There are plenty of animals that are neglected and beaten and abused. Let's not throw around a word that does not belong. Do you all realize how many dogs and cats are euthanized each year due to this notion that animals have to be indoors with humans? I'm sure all the animals that miss out on loving homes where they get to play outside really enjoy being trapped in tiny cages in the shelters until they are murdered because "no one wanted them". Priorities. Animals that are fed, watered, gotten medical attention, given shelter, and companionship are far better off than murdered or caged animals. My furballs pictured would rather be outside than in a shelter any day and they are strictly indoor cats.

Please reconsider ever owning another animal. In the meantime, find a proper home or make the proper accommodations for FH dog aka bring her inside.

I am from a farm town. People have farm dogs, yes, but they don't live outside 24/7. They are still family, they sleep inside, etc.

His reasons for not bringing that poor dog inside are reasons you should not own a pet.

I don't want to sound rude, but if I do, oh well. I really don't care, stuff like this pisses me off.

I'm a HUGE animal lover. Any man that says my dog can't sleep in my bed cuddled with me at night and wants to put my baby outside.. Well me & my pupper will be nice and warm in bed while he sleeps outside.

Sorry just my opinion.

As for the original question talk to FH about poodles. They are supposed to be super smart and not shed much. I've heard nothing but great things from their owners. That might be the best compromise for you and FH. You can easily make a no animal in the kitchen while we're cooking rule and train your animals accordingly. Mine have a perch they share while I cook. They can watch from afar without threatening the sanitary conditions of my counters. Give it time and he'll come around. Let him get used to the cat first.