So, we recently had our wedding and our intention was to only have the children in our wedding party and those over 13 present. That was mostly true, with 2 exceptions. One close friend of mine had a 6 month old baby, so, that was a fair request. Second, a family friend’s daughter got a last minute invite- her cousin and 2 good friends (my nieces) were all in the wedding and she wasn’t. My 5 year old niece asked me during the rehearsal where she was, and I felt like, “why not?” So I texted the mom and told her to bring her along. She. Was. Elated.
Exactly zero people questioned me on why some children were there and others weren’t, and I would dare anyone to come at me about the choices I made. Honestly, I caved on a number of things that I wish I hadn’t, but the kids were great. We all do what we can to have the wedding we want while also being fair and reasonable to the people we love.
My partner and I are having a child-free wedding. In fact we specifically set the age range at 18. This was for many reasons but mainly my side of the family has many loud and I'll behaved children. We wouldn't have been surprised if my family member showed up to the wedding with their kids in tow because they thought even though the invite was addressed to just the parents, OF COURSE, we'd want kids there.
To nip this in the bud, I sent an email to my large family explaining that we were excited to see everyone at the wedding but that unone under the age of 18 was not invited. So may feel this type of communication isn't for them, but I wanted to head it off at the pass. Still hearing from unhappy parents, but I'm thrilled there will be no poorly behaved teens and kids.
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Exactly. I know a few people that think even though something is addressed to the adults, it’s including the entire household. I think people are forgetting that not everyone is exposed to the same things. I’m debating whether not not to have chargers because I know someone isn’t going to understand it’s decoration.
You had me rolling when you stated some people are not going to understand the chargers are for decorations. If you want the chargers you should go for it and don't worry about other people's inability to adapt. Hopefully they will look at what others are doing and follow suit. That's what Ive done in the past when I'm a fish out of water. It's your big day so make yourself happy.
My fiance and I don't want any kids at the wedding either. Like previously mentioned we are intending to do this:
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I do not see why people make such a big deal about this. Next weekend, we will going up a Tramway to a mountain top nearby, with miles of ski and hiking trails leading out and down for miles through the White Mtns National Forest. No railings. And the couple to be married, in a small wedding, invited my husband and myself, and our now 11 and 13 yr olds by name. And we had no problem with not risking the health and safety of our 4 year olds, or our barely 9 yr old, either by slipping on the smooth Rocky summit and falling down a trailhead, or by getting lost. It never occurred to us that B and G were wrong to put our children's welfare over silly, " it's not fair to the other kids" garbage. But while it has been posted on the bulletin board , two visitors to the house have been upset on our behalf, thinking it unfair that our younger 3 we're not invited. And I will not be the least disturbed in 2 weeks when I accompany my 9 and 11 year old, and 1 child from each of two families I know, and take all 4 to the wedding of their music teacher a 90 minute drive from here. And no one thinks the other children who have not taken music lessons from teacher for 3 or more years ( as these have) need be invited, no brothers and sisters. And it is not off that 1 parent was invited from each family, not both, to chaperone their child. And I have no problem with me being invited, not my husband too. Because I am there to chaperone my daughter's, not as part of a couple. As it turns out, mine, and 2 whose parents cannot attend. In this case, the children and their siblings are not a social unit, music students and their chaperone, 3 groups if us total, are the social unit. And if people look it up in an etiquette book ( as I have to point out to others, no these couples are not doing anything wrong) they will find that both things, only inviting g children for whom the wedding will be safe and appropriate, or only inviting children who are involved with the couple ( and not their siblings) plus a parental chaperone, are both exactly appropriate etiquette. As well as common sense. Much Ado about nothing .