No Alcohol Reception

@Dorta - Do you not host people in your own home? And doing so, do you not at least offer beer, wine, variety of non-alcoholic beverages? This is called "proper hosting". This is all that we are asking people to do. Bare minimum. There are extenuating circumstances where alcohol may not be served but being cheap is not one of them.

I go a couple hours without alcohol all the time (I'm at work right now and not drinking on the job...) but if I am invited to a fun, celebratory event, I expect alcohol to be there.

Ok. Please don't do this. It is actually an insult to the other brides and groomsmen on this forum. "We are paying for it all by ourselves" and "We can't afford alcohol"... ok, most of us are paying for our own weddings...

It's called a budget.

You can afford alcoholic beverages.

But you don't want to budget for it.

Don't do STD, Flowers, decor, favors etc.

Black Friday shop.

And CUT YOUR GUEST LIST.

Have a small <30 guest wedding with no BP. Start time 2pm and end time 4pm. Cake, finger food, punch, beer/wine.

Bam guess what you are married.

And also. Correct me if I am wrong.... a 'Lemonade Stand' cost money. To have a catered lemonade stand with all the decorations, supplies, etc with enough lemonade for everyone and adding fruits and syrups. Omg all of that cost money!!!!

Host the damn wedding properly, postpone, or elope .

Even though I do not have alcohol in my home and when I have people over there is still no alcohol... there will be alcohol at my wedding...

There are some fun drinks but you have to know people's taste. I love virgin pina coladas but not everyone likes coconut. So @op unless you talk to everyone on your guestlist on what they drink on a non alcoholic level, please reconsider the alcohol and bartender..

If you can't afford the alcohol, you're having a bigger wedding than you can afford. Period. That's all there is to it. You have a couple of choices:

Have a dry wedding that people will leave immediately after the cake is cut

Cut the guest list and have alcohol.

Postpone until you can actually afford the wedding you want.

It really is that simple. Also, you can't tell people how to post, and telling people to "please be considerate" is pretty much intentionally trying to stir the pot and piss off the community. Good job. Grow up.

I certainly didn't want any of my guests to merely "survive" my wedding by being forced to "go a couple hours" without something. I wanted my guests to have a memorable, amazing time and want for nothing. I want those couple of hours to feel like minutes, not an eternity. Sure, people will politely sit around, waiting for the opportune time to depart, and when they do, they'll think to themselves "well hey, at least we survived". Is that how you want your wedding to be?

Let me get this straight, if you choose for whatever reason to not serve alcohol at your wedding you should cut your wedding list or go to the courthouse? Never realized how important liquor is to some folks.

@Leslie - now you know!

@Leslie: If you can't afford to pay for your guests to have a few drinks, you should ABSOLUTELY cut your list until you can, postpone, or elope.

Neither DF nor I drink. We're still having a full open bar. Know why? We care about our guests and want them to enjoy the wedding. The reception is a THANK YOU to your guests: it's about THEM, not YOU.

I feel like I should make a PSA.

If someone is Mormon they will never make a post about alcohol because it's not even a question of whether or not to have it at their wedding. They aren't casual drinkers. They don't "have an occasional glass." So, that "maybe they are Mormon" excuse is really just not a thing.

Well, sorta@ Leslie.

You host your guests correctly. If that means you have four of them, then so be it. It's like choosing not to have food.

Delany, legitimate question. I'm not telling you to leave but I'm genuinely curious why the hell you hang around the boards if you hate them and everyone on them so much?

@Delany: Honestly, if a couple isn't old enough to get that the reception is for their guests and making their guests comfortable, they're honestly probably not old enough/mature enough to be getting married.

I appreciate all the comments, thank you for the variety of suggestion and personal experiences. I really would like to host my wedding well, and I am doing many things myself and trying to budget as well as possible. I appreciate everyone who commented about not having as much fun at dry weddings, that gives me the perspective of my potential guests. The choice of alcohol or no alcohol will probably be solidified later on after discussion with my fiancé and parents. My mom suggested that we should try to minimum do a champagne toast, which I would like to do. Personally, and based off the population of my guests, doing more than that seems unecessary. We will have a strongly religious group, that given the option to drink would probably opt out. And the few that do drink, namely the bridal party, don't care about not having alcohol (don't worry, I asked). I am not trying to offend anyone with a small budget, I am in your same boat! But, different populations of people have different opinions on what proper hosting is. Accordingly, my mom is actually an etiquette consultant from The Protocol School of Washington....so I know her advice is sound

Also, we can't postpone, because he is being deployed. But if that were an option, we would definitely consider it.

I mean, just because your mom is an etiquette consultant doesn't mean that she's a good one.

If she were, she'd be telling you to have alcohol. Have a consumption bar. If no one drinks, you are set.

There's a difference between etiquette and good hosting. Etiquette = the minimum necessary to not be rude to your guests. That means the minimum necessary to host your guests. That doesn't mean you are hosting them well. There's a HUGE difference.

You asked your bridal party. Seriously? You think they're going to look you in the eye and say, "Wow, it's going to suck to go to a dry wedding..."? No. They're more polite. They'll smile, nod, say it's no problem, and then start planning on a flask.

Even if you only serve beer and wine, you should provide alcohol to your guests.

You can do a breakfast wedding. Alcohol IS NOT the highlight of a wedding and idk about you I definitely don't have alcohol every day of my life and I do just fine and can have fun with my family and friends without alcohol. People on here often times have no idea what "no budget" is ..... I get wanting to have a wedding and cutting alcohol expenses. Another alternative is to offer only mimosas and bloody Mary's and that would keep down costs of a morning wedding

Serious question here, OP you know that FH is being deployed this far in advance? I am not familiar with military protocol but, the limited experience I have with it usually gives a much smaller time frame on deployment.

@MNA I think the importance of alcohol is not universal. And you can have an amazing event without alcohol. I've been to tons of events that were dry and nobody left because they couldn't drink. Now food....different story. If you don't have enough food, folks will leave early. And while I'm having alcohol at my wedding I'm fortunate enough to have friends and family ready to attend to celebrate us and nit just drink.