No Alcohol Reception

@Pia: I'm guessing it was the $50 Groupon event planning course?

Seriously, if you don't know that a wedding reception is intended to be a thank you to your guests, you shouldn't be helping other people plan their weddings. So gross.

As for all the winter warriors who are storming in and blizzarding about how dare we blah blah blah, let me remind you all of a few things:

OP herself said they couldn't afford the alcohol. That means they're hosting a party they can't afford. That's not a debatable point, she made such a statement herself. It doesn't matter WHY they can't afford it, it doesn't matter if they can't afford it because they're cheap, or they're helping fly in people, or they don't have the budget for it, it still means they need to cut the budget or push the wedding back, or in this case, the best option (since they've made it clear they don't HONESTLY give a damn about their guests' comfort), elope.

Those crying "how dare you!!1!1!", should note that if a couple is making poor financial decisions, including decisions that could potentially put them in permanent financial ruin, people here are not going to direct them to make a poor choice. Suck it up.

Op also said that her BM, who she asked for their opinions, primarily don't drink. Guess what? She's getting biased opinions then, and those who do drink likely won't be honest about this. It's human nature, and you can believe what you want, but that is how people behave. I would know.

So go ahead, have your dry wedding. Save the money on a DJ though, people won't stay long enough to make it worthwhile. Seriously. They will eat, have cake, and haul ass out of there so fast, you'll be sitting there wondering wtf happened by 8:00.

DF nor I drink, but you damn well better believe we will have it available to our guests, because guess what? We want them to walk away from our wedding raving about how it was the best wedding they've been to, not snarling to each other about how they're so glad it's over and they can't wait to get home.

I'll take the good talk about our wedding for the next 30 years over the bad, thanks.

Good thing we plan on getting on to our first night by 8 at the latest!

Yes Lillian that's a very good thing, so then your guests can drive an hour back to civilization, talk shit on your dry wedding the whole time, and go have a drink at a very reasonable hour for the adults that they are.

What the hell does that sentence even mean?

I did not say I encourage dry weddings, I simply said I don't tell my guest it is poor hosting or they should do what they can't afford.

I also don't tell them that their love ones will be sorely upset with their decision.

As for your Wikipedia post Ms. KitKatt I am certified wedding and event planner. I have studied and continue to study to show my self worthy to assist my clients in making their events ones to remember. All of my education in that field and in hospitality and public relations tells me that a reception, though people spend largely 55 to 75% of their wedding budget is on other people, is in fact THEIRS and they should make it enjoyable for themselves first before others. I help brides to focus on making the day memorable for THEM. And invite people who will be happy for them and not be upset about their choice of colors, venue, favors, food or BEVERAGES.

The 2 most important jobs of an event coordinator is to keep the client on SCHEDULE and on BUDGET.

To mention David Tutera, you must also consider is clientele............

@Pia - Awesome. I worked for years in those industries too. I have never heard that. A reception (wedding or otherwise) is to receive people and to host them properly with food and beverages, alcohol is included in that. To keep a client on budget, you need to remind them of what is important, a $3000 dollar dress is not when they can only afford to host $1500 for food and beverages for 200 people. A wedding is not all about the bride. Definitely pick up the Miss Manners book.

I've addressed the bride and now I will exit this thread to see what others are talking about.

Lillian have an outstanding celebration dear, and may your marriage be filled with Joy and be a reflection of God's love for His church!

This post is a hot mess

I have nothing to add because there is no advice here left to give. OP has already made up her mind and the co-signers have sealed the deal.

I just came for the memes.

"and may your marriage be filled with Joy and be a reflection of God's love for His church!"

This seems like a weird thing to say in this situation.

@Pia: So I was right, Groupon training. Good to know.

At least now we know why we get so many couples on here declaring it's THEIR DAY and they'll do what they want. It's because of sucky planners who use that line to get a bigger fee. Good to know.

Such gross, unethical business practices...

Lol...

This is the exact reason im buying my flowers from the grocery store and why (as of right now) there will be minimal decor at our wedding. I would rather use my budget to give my guests all the delicious food, top shelf bar, and amazing DJ for the lenght of our reception. People won't talk about my flowers for years to come, but they will talk about how much fun they had. If you can't afford to give your guests the thanks they deserve you need to rethink some things.

@OG Kathryn yes...lol! The venue had AC! But, it was so hot outside, that people still wanted to use the pool! Most or all of the kids were in it pretty much the whole time, and about 60% of the adults were in it after dinner...LOL! The game room and everything indoors, was all air conditioned!

Oh, it's the darn religious people who are spoiling all our fun.

Rats.

Yes Lillian, it's poor hosting.

Pia needs to go back to event planning school.

I hope that swimming pool was full of vodka. Because that's what I'd be looking for.

And Pia? The first job of a planner is to keep people on budget; that doesn't mean cutting out forks because they can't afford it. It doesn't mean that they should consider themselves FIRST. They can do that if they elope.

I won't try to sway anyone one way or the other. I'm just saying it's possible to do it...LOL! We invited about 100 people, with the knowledge there would be no alcohol, and 72 showed up. The ones that didn't, couldn't because they were from out of state and couldn't travel! I'd say that's a pretty good turnout, and no one cared that the venue didn't allow alcohol or that we, ourselves didn't want any there, no matter which venue we would've chosen! If someone wants to have alcohol at their wedding, then they are more than welcome to, but if the venue doesn't allow it, or the couple doesn't want it there, I don't think it's the end of the world! That's all I'm saying!

It shouldn't be a problem and if those offended don't come they don't come. Ppl should not need Alcohol to celebrate your day. If that's the biscuit u have to dangle for ppl to participate then they should not celebrate with u.

Cash bar is tacky, and a dry wedding is disappointing from a guest point of view. I have been to open bar, cash bar, and dry weddings, and anything but open bar your guests will feel some type of way about. And the gift they give you will probably be less as well