No alcohol at reception but alcohol at the "after party"???

@TooManyMistys $78 dollars for a case, or 24 beers. So the same as they would charge for one if we were sitting in their restaurant. My fiance' knows a distributor, and we had hoped to be able to bring our own and have four or five fifths, many bottles of wine and a keg. That plan was shot when we found out their license wouldn't allow us to.

Would you consider a printed itinerary sitting alongside the guest book? It could list the time for food and when the other music would start and the bar opens. Then people will know what to expect. You could even have a skull and crossbones warning above the start time for the after party!

I would just do beer and wine. Depending on the guest count it shouldn't be too much. You could wait to serve alcohol though I am not sure if it will end up cheaper. If price is a factor I would just pay for what you could afford and either go cash or close the bar once the fund amount has been reached. Given that toasts though are done around dinner time I still think you are not going to be able to avoid the alcohol later thing?

Ok - I think we were confused because of the "after party" wording. So it's not an after party - it's just still your reception. However, I am still a little confused as to how the guests who you don't want to drink may stay longer in order to get their free drinks.... Or do you not mind that they (the heavy drinkers) will be drinking at that time (aka the 2nd part of your reception / aka the after party).

There are a few things you could do but opening the bar an hour later won't likely stop it from being too expensive if cost is a concern. There are many ways to limit the cost if that is the main issue. You can do just beer and wine as this is usually cheaper than liquor. You can cap the bar at a dollar value you are comfortable with, or you could do a time limit, like 1 hours open bar then it goes to cash (just make sure your guests know if you are doing this).

If the issue isn't cost but more aunt peggy is offended by loud music and booze. Let your DJ know to play music appropriate for EVERYONE until say 8pm and then he / she can kick it up a notch. As far as if Aunt Peggy is offended by others drinking oh well, I doubt it's the first event where people drink and you can't please everyone. Even rowdy friends will usually put on their filters around gramma and tone it down a notch without being asked.

@Alexandra. GOOD IDEA! Thanks! That made me laugh.

Yea, that's why I'm put after party in quotes....because it's just a more rowdy continuation of the reception.

I will state once again that we are not shunning anyone, we are not keeping anyone from drinking, we are not withholding alcohol from anyone. I don't know why, for those of you who have alluded to this, would think that since I've never said that. What I have stated is that I want to keep a little time after the wedding more low key, without loud music, without alcohol, allowing time to take more photos, cut the cake, eat some good food, visit with people.....but for some of you, that appears to be tacky because I'm not providing alcohol. I live in a dry county......so, people around here are used to having to drive at least 15 miles to the nearest beer store.

@Shannon....thanks. There are only a couple of issues... ...what I listed above and also cost. We are having this at a nice venue with what I think are cool wedding favors for everyone, great food, great music (no matter what direction you lean towards)....so, after that expense, on top of other things, alcohol is the last thing I want to spend a whole lot of money on. I'm thinking capping the bar would be the best thing to do and is one of the most popular ways to handle this issue, per the venue director.

Have a cash bar because the rest of that is too confusing.

If you're getting married at 6:00, expect the food to be consumed by 7:30 - 8:00, and there is no alcohol, you can expect people to clear out. Actually, a few of the receptions I've been to lately (personal) have been deafening, and anyone over the age of 35 has been pretty miserable. It's a combination of not being able to have a conversation with the person seated next to you, and the fact that the music is really directed at a very young age demographic.

I would really appreciate a reception that kept a decent variety of music playing, and after a few hours, turn the place into a dance club if that's what the bride and groom and their friends want. I'd be very happy to call it night after the ceremony, a few dances, and dinner. I know the older people would appreciate it too (they are the first ones out the door, usually).