Name Change Regrets?

My best friend is in a troubled marriage and desperately regretting changing her last name which is causing me to take a pause at changing mine

Kahealani King sounds presidential.

I have a good friend whose initials were JER, and she chose to hypenate her name after getting married to a guy with the last name of K.

And she still hasn't lived it down.

I have a super common last name (Peterson) and terrible initials (TP, I've been called toilet paper way too many times) so I'm excited to change my last name.

My mom made her maiden name her middle name and actually made it my middle name too! Whatever makes you happy

I'm actually sad about changing my last name. If you google it, I could tell you who every person was and how we are related haha And my fiance's name is some what common. It kind of sucks, but I guess I will change it anyways :p I think it is generally just difficult to part with a name that has been with you for your whole life. Hopefully, you get used to it! I'm sure I'll be in the same boat!

As a past athlete everyone calls me by my last name- McGee which I love 90 percent of the time (nicknames often end in something-McGee, resulting in a lot of people thinking they are very creative with a slang for my chest region- gets old) FH is actually taking his grandpas last name who only had girls, so we are both getting a new last name, Malone, which I like as well.

@Melissa, when I filled out the form last week for SS, you could put whatever for your middle name. I actually wrote my middle and maiden in that space because I wanted to keep it, but the lady just used my middle, so if you want your middle name you should be able to keep it.

That is SO Sweet of your DH. We are not married yet, but we are both hyphenating our last names his-mine. I have never wanted to give up my name, and I wouldn't feel like it was a real marriage if we didn't have the same last name (not attacking anyone's choice, it just wouldn't work for me).

Personally I don't think it sounds weird if he has her last name, but that's just me. I originally wanted that, but realized it wasn't fair to him when he was resistant.

Emily we will share the same last name! My new last name will be Malone as well!

I am dragging my heels. I'm hyphenating because I'm almost 36 and gave a solid reputation with my career as the name I have.

I'm 26, fresh out of grad school so no long professional career, BUT my last name is part of my identity. I am extremely close to my dad's side of the family, so I want to carry the name with me, so I've chosen to hyphenate. I don't really care if people address me with my new, hyphenated last name, but I'll always know its there!

None of my friends will know I'm hyphenated. I'm not keeping it a secret, but I'm going to publicly introduce myself as Erica xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxski. I just want to keep my maiden name in the hyphen for work. Work people will still call me Ms. (Maiden name).

I'm a teacher. I've been at my school for 8 years, been a teacher for 10. EVERYONE knows me by my maiden name. I have parents calling the school begging the counselor to put their kids in my class because I'm so well-liked and I'm a damn good teacher. The name change will throw everyone off - especially district people and teachers at other schools who might not have known that I changed it.

I only regret it when I'm on Facebook and see that my dad's first wife and my unce's wife, neither of whom I like, both have my maiden name and are currently the only women who do. Then I console myself that my big bro has given me three adorable nieces who I fully expect to grow into charmning, intelligent women with my maiden name.

@ Alison, I don't think it's weird for a man to take his wife's last name, I meant the particular combination of DH's first name and my last name would sound weird.

I have no attachment to my old name, Im excited to take my hubs name.

I'm like Shannon and Emily, regretted changing my name with my first marriage si changed it back after the divorce. And it's such an annoyance getting everything changed that I decided I'd not do it again. Thankfully FH is totally fine with me keeping my last name, besides which it just fits me. But in also not going to go around correcting people if they refer to me by FH'S last name

I haven't changed yet, but I am counting down the days. My last name is 16 letters (hyphenated pain in the ass). My mom thought it would be cute, but its a royal pain for years and I can't wait to be done with it. I know that sounds awful, but dealing with a long last name is hard, especially when its hyphenated.

You don't have to change right away. A friend of mine isn't changing her last name until they have kids so its easier. Professionally, she'd still be known by her maiden name.

Erica, will all those X's represent how many letter you will have in your name???? DAMN!

OH, I am dragging my feet on changing my name too. I have been my last nime fo almost 30 years! It isn't easy to just let that go!

My co worker told me my new name will sound like a french stripper! Great

DH wants me to take his last name and I will but I am just sad about losing my name. No way I will hyphen though. DH thinks it's a slap in the face to him if I didn't take his last name. I will probably feel just like Ashleigh did.

I had a conversation about name changes with DH when we were discussing marriage.

Him: I'd really like you to take my name so it feels like we're a unit.

Me: If unity is what you want, then why can't you take my name? We'd still match.

Him: My heritage, professional reputation, it's a hassle to change it, I like my name...

Me: And I wouldn't have any of those same feelings?

Him: ...oh.

He got it right away and hasn't pushed the subject since. I occasionally get addressed by his last name, which I don't mind. More hilariously, my friends will address him as Mr. Mylastname.

Frankly, if he'd pressured me about taking his name, or acted insulted when I didn't want to change it, that would be a HUGE red flag. It's far too controlling, "me Tarzan, you Jane," for my tastes. A name change should be completely voluntary.