My bridesmaids suck.

This post is becoming really mean... And normally I'm all for holding people accountable for what they say, but this is just making more drama?

Anyway, CostumedBride: there is nothing you can do. Sometimes it does stink when your BMs fight you. Is there anyway to exchange the dresses for something more flattering? Maybe something like the dresses below? But I wouldn't have bought their dresses without having them trying them on honestly...

Marisa-in-Love – nice! I think the middle one would be figure flattering for any body type!

I'm not trying to be rude here but to me it sounds like you are dictating everything for them. Most brides give their BMs a chance to try on a few dresses and at least give some input into what they will be wearing. In addition, most brides will just say "I am requiring you to get makeup done but do what you feel comfortable with"

In your instance, you are telling them you MUST wear dress A b/c I like it and I don't care if you think it looks bad AND you MUST wear dark makeup even though you may never wear makeup at all.

Just going to go off of what you're saying in this post... I'm not even touching the past drama.

I really like the new dress, but I do think that it probably wouldn't be the most flattering on a larger woman. I can't really blame them for being a little annoyed if they didn't get to try the dresses on first. Can you exchange them? Marisa posted some nice options above. If not, well, not much you can do about it at this point, but don't expect them to be thrilled about it.

Okkkk **sigh**

How about you do a commitment ceremony and file domestic partnership paperwork? That way you can easily disolve the relationship, you get the tax/medical benefits and youre not making a total sham to your guests. I feel like that would ne more realistic as to what youre expecting out of your relationship. Its fine to live the life and relationship the way you want... just dont dress up your wolf in sheeps clothing.

Did you buy that wedding dress already? It looks very tasteful and I really like the added dye to the bottom

Ok, I like the new dress and even the new BM dress. If they are upset about the shape, is it possible to have them in something more figure flattering? You said you ordered them for them, did you buy them outright and will the store let you change the order? Marisa-in-love posted some really pretty options....

Did you let them have even a little say? Maybe that is why they are mad...I know its about you and your FH but me and my BM went shopping together and they tried on several in the syles I liked. We bought the dresses they all liked and look great in and i choose the colors.

Maybe its just no for them? Do they normaly wear their makeup they way you want them to? They might feel embarressed. And as a "bigger" girl with out trying on the dress I myself would feel akward and such. I do like your new dress idea with the black lace.

I can see why they are mad..not letting them try on the BM dress and just ordering based on size is pretty dismissive of your BMs..street size is never really the same as in BM dresses..also different styles of dresses fit different body types differently.

I would never just assign my BMs a dress. I'd want them to try it on and feel comfortable in it as in theory they are good friends, not just props to fit a theme.

I've said this on other posts and I'll say it here. You're a bride, NOT a dictator.

Yes, it's considered to be your and FH's day so you do have final say, BUT the way you present things to people can determine their reaction. Making blanket decisions without taking your BM's into consideration can cause friction.

I said this on a post yesterday and I'll repeat it. I chose my BP not for what they could or would do for me but because I love them, they're important to me and I couldn't imagine NOT having them next to me as I marry FH.

I see both sides of this. While a bride should get final say on the dress, I would be very upset as a bridesmaid if I wasn't allowed to try a dress on first. That would say to me that I wasn't important enough to the bride to have my feelings taken into consideration.

However, your friends shouldn't be talking badly about decisions that have little to do with them. If they had a problem with your philosophy on marriage or thought you weren't taking it seriously they either shouldn't have said yes or should have backed out much earlier.

How you view marriage is none of my business so I'm not going to judge or criticize you for that.

This is why I don't post on WW anymore.

I agree with what Ab said. These girls are not human props for you. I get you want to stick with a theme, but you can do that in other ways too, like decor, etc. But to make a friend feel wholly uncomfortable between their dress and makeup seems just wrong. I wish you the best, but try to at least consider their feelings.

LOL Jen I'm getting there!

I like those dresses actually. Yours also!

My bridesmaids dont do anything. They are planning a bachelorette I believe, but it seems like it is more for them to have a night out. They don't help with wedding stuff so I just stopped mentioning it. I don't really have much advice but I hear you!

Also I get the thing people say that you choose your wedding based on people you love, not on what they can do for you... I get that BUT I could have loved them just as much & invited them as guests. It's be nice to have some support throughout the process... Isn't that part of the point?

Edit : didnt see the part about not thinking you'll be married long... To that I also wonder what is the point & maybe your pals are feeling the same. To each her own, good luck to you

Nothing can make a girl look as bad in a dress as she does when she FEELS bad in a dress. As a plus-size gal, I would be miserable standing in front of people in a dress that showed too many bumps or rolls, even if I was supposed to be up there supporting and happy for my bride-friend. And while that dress looks beautiful, it does not look very figure-forgiving.

How many BMs do you have, and how many are unhappy with the dress? Did you just ask the girls what size dresses they wore and then put in an order? Did you get their actual measurements and compare that to the dress sizes? If I were you, I would see if I could halt the dress order and try to compromise with your BMs so you can both be happy with the dress.