Skip to main content

Post content has been hidden

To unblock this content, please click here

Gen
Champion June 2019

Mr and Mrs pronouncement

Gen, on August 14, 2018 at 11:15 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 73
I feel like it has always felt a little off to me when a couple is pronounced and introduced with the man’s first name, like “Mr and Mrs John Doe” instead of just “Mr and Mrs Doe.”

Like I guess there’s nothing “wrong” with it I just feel like referring to a woman as “Mrs *husband’s name*” is a little outdated? This isn’t a huge deal at all lol but just wondering if I’m the only one who thinks like this!

73 Comments

Latest activity by Lynnie, on August 16, 2018 at 3:26 PM
  • Joanna
    Dedicated November 2018
    Joanna ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    Yes I totally agree! I think I'd just prefer "Mr. & Mrs. ____"
    • Reply
  • Kiwibride
    Super November 2018
    Kiwibride ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    I agree completely. The concept is super outdated. Women are no longer property, we have our own identities and don't just morph into part of our husband when we marry. I refuse to address my invitations that way and I'd actually be a bit offended if I received anything addressing me that way. People should either both get their first names or neither of them.
    • Reply
  • Cody
    Just Said Yes October 2019
    Cody ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    I think it’s very outdated as well. I am keeping my last name so I am tasked with figuring out the best introduction without sounding weird. Smiley smile It’s very long to say both our full names.
    • Reply
  • C
    Master July 2018
    Cuoghi ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    If you dont take his name this isnt an issue Smiley smile #nonamechange
    • Reply
  • M
    Savvy September 2018
    Mercella ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    I hate this; I feel like it erases the brides identity completely. Although I'm honored to don "thompson" and make us a family under one last name, my first name is not changing. My officiant and dj/mc will introduce us as mr & mrs will & mercella thompson. It's long but my name is not "will".
    • Reply
  • K
    Just Said Yes October 2019
    Kate ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    Yeah, it definitely feels off to me too, and I think it's an outdated custom at best. I don't plan on changing my last name when I marry, but if I did I'd want us to be introduced as Mr. and Mrs. LastName as opposed to Mr. and Mrs. HusbandsName.
    • Reply
  • Carrie
    Devoted September 2016
    Carrie ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    I hate this with a fiery passion. I also didn't change my name because I do not like this outdated tradition period, but I've still received things addressed to me like this and it offends me. I have my own name.
    • Reply
  • J'Neil
    Devoted September 2018
    J'Neil ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    I agree this is outdated and irritating.

    Even so, it’s not too difficult to be announced as “Mr and Mrs. husbandfirst and wifefirst lastname”

    Or if you keep your name; “Mr husbandfullname and Mrs wifefullname”

    The whole changing or not changing your name doesn’t need to be complicated Smiley smile
    • Reply
  • Gen
    Champion June 2019
    Gen ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    View Quoted Comment
    Yes I totally agree! I am really excited to take my FH’s last name but I’m not taking his first name too hahaha
    • Reply
  • Gen
    Champion June 2019
    Gen ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    View Quoted Comment
    This is exactly how I feel lol. I do plan to change my last name, but so we were writing out our the ceremony and my FH wrote the last line as “it is my pleasure to introduce for the first time, Mr and Mrs Husbandsname Lastname” and I really did NOT like that, I felt like it was outdated! I changed it to just “Mr and Mrs Lastname” (he was fine with it lol, didn’t care either way) but I was just curious if I was the only one who was 1) fine with the idea of taking my husband’s last name but 2) hating the idea of being introduced as Mrs HisFirstName too lol. Glad to see from all these comments that I’m not the only one!
    • Reply
  • Gen
    Champion June 2019
    Gen ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    View Quoted Comment

    I totally agree on the identity thing too, just wanted to check with people here to make sure i wasnt overreacting lol

    • Reply
  • Gen
    Champion June 2019
    Gen ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    View Quoted Comment

    Yeah I am taking his last name and I'm totally fine with being Mrs. LastName (I'm even excited about it lol) but I do not want to be Mrs HisFirstName too, that just makes me cringe

    • Reply
  • Karen
    Savvy October 2018
    Karen ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    When I was little and my folks would get mail addressed to Mr. And Mrs. Dads first and last name, it just confused me! I was like dude, they forgot moms name! When I was married before, it never bothered me and I doubt it'll bother me this time around.
    • Reply
  • Pirate & 60s Bride
    Legend March 2017
    Pirate & 60s Bride ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    Kept my last name. I think the officiant said “I now pronounce you husband & wife. You may now kiss.” And that was it so no need to restate our names. 👍
    • Reply
  • Tiffany Rose
    Dedicated August 2018
    Tiffany Rose ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    I've always thought it sounded odd to me too, it doesn't necessarily bother me though
    • Reply
  • Tiffany Rose
    Dedicated August 2018
    Tiffany Rose ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    View Quoted Comment
    At my wedding they are going to say that and then afterwards say "it's my great honor and privilege to be the first to present to you Mr. and Mrs. Jereth Hewell" so both will be said lol
    • Reply
  • J
    Master 0000
    Judith ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    I hate it too, like the woman looses her identity at marriage . Why I continue to use my birth surname, which also means my first name is used if Hubby's first is used. But I do believe people are entitled to be addressed as they wish, so I respect that and use the merged married Mr. And Mrs. His Name when that is what a person wants. I used to work with folks who would deliberately use Ms. Her birth name instead of Mrs. His name, even though the woman preferred the old style address. To me that is aggressive and arrogant. You are taking away the woman's identity by renaming her because of your own politics, which is no better than requiring a woman take the man's name . Most important to me is that the woman's own choice be respected whether other people like it or not. But this always comes up at wedding time, when addressing things and writing name cards for people usually referred to by their respective first names.
    • Reply
  • Savvy November 2021
    ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    Oh my goodness! Seeing this post and taking a step back you brides are right!! It doesn’t sound right to be introduced as my FH first name with our last name... like what about me? Lol
    • Reply
  • C
    Devoted April 2019
    Cheyenne ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    I never really thought about it. I don’t think I mind either way, I think some things are just purely tradition and not so much trying to erase a woman’s identity at this point.
    • Reply
  • C
    Master July 2018
    Cuoghi ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    View Quoted Comment
    You cant really pick and choose. That is how formal introductions are done and have been done for some time.
    • Reply

You voted for . Add a comment 👇

×


WeddingWire celebrates love ...and so does everyone on our site! Learn more

Rockstars

  • D
    Getting married in 07/03/2025

Groups

WeddingWire article topics