Mother in laws

Tell her if she wants you to change the date, then she can pay for a new date with all of the vendors!

No way... don’t let her ruin this for you. I’m sorry, but you have my support 110%

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With that being said, I would absolutely not change the date. She is being unreasonable to ask you to do that. Does she know that you can't get your deposit back? It's a Mardi Gras celebration, that definitely doesn't top her son's wedding... or it shouldn't.

No no no no no. You gotta talk to your fiancé. It would be one thing if she didn’t know the date and you didn’t already have the venue but you do and that’s more important

Also when you do go to talk about it don’t say that her stuff isn’t important and what not. Tell her that you can’t get your deposit back and you have an understanding that she knew the date. Tell her how much you want her there and how she’s an important part of your life. Make her feel good rather than attacked.

In my opinion, NO wedding planning issue is big enough for you to fight with your future husband. It’s his mother, and if he’s okay with it and doesn’t think you should be upset I think it would be easier on everyone if you just let it go. You got bigger fish to fry girlfriend.

Any updates? Me thinks Mom in Law will suddenly drop her Mardi Gras plans.......I think this is a power play by Mom in Law.

If she knew the date before she planned this, she is most definitely in the wrong. And even if she planned it before, her sons wedding should be a bigger priority than Mardi Gras! I would be very upset, especially if my FH was defending her in the situation.

Wow I’m so sorry to hear that you are going through this.
I also feel like you and FH really need to have a serious conversation. I mean a ball overs wedding her sons wedding and him defending this is definitely a red flag to me. Will this be an on going thing.
I wouldn’t change my date but that’s me you seem like you haven’t made up your mind so I agree with the other pp if she’s willing to pay a new deposit and your not sold on your date and want to keep the piece then change it but once again I say I wouldn’t!!!!

Any update? Have you shown this thread to your fiancé? I’m so sorry girl

View Quoted Comment The OP profile says the wedding is 2 months away, October. But The Marfi Gras balls are in Feb 2020. During Mardi Gras time. And the wedding would not conflict if not in February. 7 months away.

Haha....no. If the venue is booked the date is set in stone. She needs to put her son before her other BS....that's crazy

You deserve more support from your FH. You should sit down and talk to him and tell him what you need.

HUH?? Wow! How long has your date been set? That’s pretty selfish. I think my FH would also have a problem with that if we were in your situation. Why would she make plans AFTER you two already set the date? I would tell both of them were not changing the date. Have you already made deposits for stuff?

Have you made any progress with this, OP?

I’m sorry.. but not really... but no... have fun at Marti Gras we will send you pics of the wedding. Sorry not sorry.
Cant change the venue you already have deposits down. No no no... you can either miss Mari Gras or miss the wedding. That is beyond crazy. My mind is blown someone would actually say that.

UPDATE: Yes my wedding wasn’t in February that’s why I made the comment about Mardi Gras and his mother choosing the party over the wedding so we moved up the wedding to October.

I feel if you give in this time and rebook venue and change the contracts with vendors you will be doing it again within a few weeks even a month. She will plan another life event to make a priority and put you on hold. Ask you FH if she is the woman he is making all his future plans with or are you. It's not just a wedding it is the beginning of married life when 2 lives fully combine. You should be his first concern and someday only come second to your children. Sending you happy thoughts and peace of mind.

I wouldn’t change the date. Especially when you have already booked your venue. Your fiancé should understand. I feel bad for you.

Most couples look at venues and then decide on a date accordingly, so I'm assuming it's been booked (also per your other comments, it has been booked). If that date works for you and your fiance, and maybe most people in your party or attendees, then I wouldn't change it. If her son's wedding is important to her in any way, she can make the sacrifice to be there. Quite frankly, it shouldn't be a sacrifice at all. I'm also sorry that you're dealing with such stress.