Meet and Greet/Engagement party

How much she will be collecting????

Bridesmaid expectations and responsibilities:

1. Show up on time to the wedding. Bonus points for relatively sober.

2. Wear the dress as agreed upon.

That's it. That's all they HAVE to do. Everything else is OPTIONAL, and it is not, and should not be, an option to remove or expect a bridesmaid to step down for not being able to attend OPTIONAL activities. No one will be as excited about your wedding as you.

Other than buying a dress and standing by your side as a honored guest there are no responsibilities. Sure BMs may offer to do more, but are not required to do so. Asking them to be a BMs is a way for YOU to honor the relationship.

Glitter covered slaves. What a great way to treat your nearest and dearest

Oh. So much nope.

I've seen bridal parties (just the brides and bridesmaid) have lunch and go over everything... I've seen bridal party help with the planning (lil meetings) and pre wedding events.

Lol nope.

It doesn't matter what you have seen. All of that is optional.

Some people are not able to commit to being a bridesmaid whether it be finances or anything else. So it would be their opportunity to opt out!

You've seen it where? In movies? Where it's a bunch of cackling hyenas doing cake tastings and stuffing envelopes? That's not real life.

Lol!! Wow.. I was just asking for an opinion... and I get all these crazy answers... my first big wedding. Maybe I heard the info wrong. But thanks you guys! Thanks for the help!!

Why even have a bridal party if you are going to treat them like shit? The point of have bridesmaids is to honor the people closest to you, not for them to become your slaves and plan your party. They shouldn't have to attend meet and greets or planning meetings. They have a life and they shouldn't have to put it on pause because you are getting married. Plan your own damn wedding. Also, the only thing they have to pay for is the dress and you should take all of their budgets into consideration before you pick a dress.

If you ask them all together, and they can't, they may feel obligated to say yes because you put them on the spot. Ask them individually. Don't force them into an awkward party and make them feel like they have to say yes

You asked a question, we answered and corrected the completely wrong information you had been given (apparently by a so-called wedding planner (read: someone trying to plan another event to collect more money from you)). We are unbiased and honest, and will tell you the truth, with no ulterior motives.

You're welcome!!

I feel like you might have good intentions but it's pretty unnecessary. The first time all of the people in my bridal party have met is... Hasn't happened yet. It may truly be at my wedding. Which is fine. They don't need to be bffs.

I'm a BM right now and I know I will not meet the other girls until the day of. I've messaged them on fb to let them know what dress I got (we were all in charge of choosing our own) but that's been it. And the wedding is in March. It's really no biggie.

But if you're expecting bedazzling, DIYing, over the top bridesmaids.. I'd be opting out. Any extra help is nice, but not necessary. And to ahev a list of expectations would piss me off tbh

OP, Ive been on the other end of this. I was BMs in a friends wedding and she multiple "meetings" and BP meet and greets. It was annoying AF. People have lives and it is not their responsibility to help you plan your wedding. If they offer, awesome! Graciously accept it! But if not, dont constantly push for it or it will likely push your friends away.

How is having fun treating them like shit? I ask for opinions. I think some of you became illiterate. None of my bridesmaid planning my party!! My wedding planner plans the party but my MOH plans the bachelorette party!! My people don't think like you!!!! THANK GOD! But thanks for your advice. No need to explain any more! U getting confuse more and more!!

OP, a meet and greet might be a regional thing? I'm from the south and I've been to meet and greets. They're like mixers with the bride's side and the groom's side. It's usually low-key, like a BBQ or a bowling night or something like that. I wouldn't travel for one since I live far away now, but the ones I've been to weren't lavish cocktail affairs. Just casual friend get togethers where one set of friends probably doesn't know the other set. I haven't heard of these outside the south though.

ETA: these are after people have been asked to be BMs and GMs. I will also say that I'm from the land of massive bridal parties and brides usually ask right away. My best friend and my cousin each asked me on the nights they got engaged if I would be a BM.

Maybe if you had better grammar we wouldn't be "illiterate"

I am I the only one who couldn't make any sense of the original post?

Reading your updates this sounds very odd. Now it may be something that's "regional" to your area but that doesn't make it okay.

Also, you cannot tell your bridal party how much the dresses will be. You first need to discuss in private with each bridesmaid individually what they're comfortable spending and go from there.

I suggest lurking around here a bit more before you set anything in motion.

Most importantly .. fire that planner