Maybe I'm being gauche, but...

I don't get it either. Seems like a waste of paper and money

We sent STDs to let people know well ahead of time since we are having a DW and it's a holiday weekend. If we were doing something local I'm not sure if I would have sent any.

We are doing them because we are getting married close to thanksgiving.... we want people to plan for our wedding so they don't make other plans to travel for the holiday... a lot of people do them when they have a lot of oot guests who need to make travel arrangement

I wanted to send save the dates because we are getting married on July 2 and a lot of our friends and family would have planned a Fourth of July trip if they weren't aware of our date. Yes we could have just spread the word but this seemed more efficient. The 8-10 week notice that an invitation would have given them would have been too late if people were planning a trip. Otherwise, I understand your point, but some things are important to some people and meaningless to others.

Okay, those reasons make sense!

FH agrees. He had never heard of them, and basically convinced me to skip them. However, I had an idea for them, and we are both getting questions about when the STDs are coming out so now they are back on the table. I do agree that they aren't always necessary.

We are doing them BC our wedding is on a Friday and a good number of people are coming from out of town. Like half our guest list. It gives them more time to plan and take off work if necessary

I had the same thoughts. I have learned(from being on WW) for larger weddings with many out of town guests this is a helpful tool for couples to let their guests know in advance. I have understood it's to much work for the bride and groom to contact everyone personally due to larder scale weddings.

We have chosen not to do save the dates. We are having a small intimate local wedding and simply were able to inform people casually of our date as it came up. Yay for saving money!

Traditionally, invitations are supposed to go out 8 weeks before the wedding. The point of a STD is to allow people who have to travel (and those who need to ask for time off months in advance) the opportunity to make arrangements prior to that time frame. For instance, most of my guest list has to travel for my wedding and it's right in the middle of Thanksgiving and Christmas, a busy time for most people. I want to give them time to save money, buy plane tickets, and get hotel rooms. Also, some of my friends will need several months notice to take off work, so I want to make sure they know well in advance.

For people having local weddings where the vast majority of the guest list is local, a STD isn't necessary.

Sending STD's to all my family overseas so they can save up and plan their trip! Everyone that lives close by will only get an invitation.

I have guests coming from 5 or 6 different states and wanted to give them a heads up. My FH's entire family is out of state so essentially it's a DW for them.

Invitations only go out about 8 weeks in advance. I know that our friends' social calendars book up early. I also have family who needs to travel. Save the Dates lets people know a lot more in advance so they can just put it on their calendar and not have something come up that day. It also lets anyone who needs to book a flight and hotel save money and possibly have a good rate if they watch flight and hotel prices.

I sent out save the dates because we decided to get married in 2016 instead of 2017, and wanted to make sure everyone was on the same page.

I would not have bothered if that had not been the case

We're not having a DW, but we do have a lot of guests coming from out of town. Would it be okay to just send STDs to them? Or should we send them to everyone?

It's unnecessary and it ties you into a guest list far before you may be ready. OOT guests? Call them and tell them.

Agreed, we are doing them because a lot of our friends and family are coming from out of town and because some of our friends work on the weekends so they'll have to ask for time off ahead of time

Personally I think they are a waste of money, lock you into inviting people, and really don't make a difference. Many brides who've sent STD's still had lower than expected turnouts.

We did Save the Dates (I refuse to call them STDs) because our wedding is destination. We wanted people to have plenty of notice if they needed/wanted to save up to attend.

We aren't doing them simply because all our guest live within 40 miles

The majority of our guests are from out of state. It is to give them time to request off from work and make travel plans.

In my job, I have to request vacation time off a minimum of 3 months before I want to take it (but the sooner the better). I also have to find my own coverage if I want off on my weekend to work. That takes time. STDs give those people ample time to work out logistics.

ETA: It's also a reminder when they see it hanging near their calendar. I tend to magnet things near my calendar, but never get around to writing them in (dentist, doctor, etc).