Married before wedding

"I already replied to Blair on that. For an anniversary, nobody but the couple celebrates. Nobody else flies anywhere, get all dolled up, etc."

The original post was about what day they celebrate their anniversary. That conversation evolved to include deceptive reasons that some choose to celebrate their anniversary on a different day than their actual anniversary. And yes, people are going to have opinions on that. It's a forum. We have opinions on everything.

I talked to a military couple who did this and they said that they celebrate both days

My friend got married in the US before their destination wedding in the DR, to make the legalities more simple. They purposely got married on their dating anniversary and celebrate their wedding date on the date they got married- the date in the US.

My mom did. She wanted to get married on her grandma's birthday but couldn't find a venue that had that day available. They had a small ceremony on the beach and booked the venue for the next day. I think they just celebrate both days.

@MrsWrs Centerpiece was, quite literally, answering the OP's question. I honestly don't understand your point of contention. You're on a thread where the OP specifically asks when people celebrate their anniversary. Some posters answered that question exactly as it was asked. Others took the liberty to give more nuanced responses and opinions based on the original question. What's the problem?

Culturally, we have a civil ceremony separate from the actual reception. We will be celebrating the date of

Our reception.

Birthdays vs. wedding anniversaries? Well, both are a matter of legal record. However, neither of them require a celebration. If it's your birthday, you might be fortunate enough to have someone who loves you enough to host a huge blast on the weekend before or after your birthday, or you might be lucky enough to have one individual, either a SO, a spouse, a parent, a sibling, or a cousin, take you out to an amazing dinner in an upscale restaurant. You might get a $59.99 bouquet delivered to your job or at your home with a "Happy Birthday" sentiment attached. You might receive a few birthday cards in the mail -- either before or after the birthday, or you might get 22 birthday greetings on FB because your "friends" received an alert that it's your birthday. What matters is that this birthday, whether it originally happened in January, March, May, November, or December, is celebrated as near to the original, certified event as possible. That's just the way it goes.

A wedding anniversary is a little different. Truthfully, after the "public wedding" is over, you can't expect the world you live in to remember your wedding anniversary. Even if your wedding day is the day on which you had the big, public affair, you cannot expect anything more of your guests than what they gave you, in speech and in material, on your wedding day. You may get a few anniversary cards, but they won't be coming from everyone who attended your wedding.

Trying to equate a birthday being celebrated on a Saturday after the actual birth date with a wedding that has two dates -- one legal, and one public -- doesn't make any sense. One has nothing to do with the other. One is just the closest available, late night party date. The other has nothing to do with the party, but rather, with the chosen anniversary.

And MrsWrs, she did say, "if so". You're correct. However, those two small words aren't keeping anyone out of this conversation if they want to be heard. That's just part of life on the internet. You can try to sequester your audience, but it rarely works. It's a public forum, and her question, one that women beyond her ideal audience related to, drew answers from all quarters. She posted her question on a public forum, and the answers she received came from her audience -- the public.