Last minute rsvp days before my wedding

Did you contact them after the RSVP date to ask if they were coming? If you did, say no. If you didn't, it's time to work that chart out

Nope. I would not feel bad one bit. Ok, maybe I would for a second, but let's be honest. It's not as if they responded a day or two late - but THREE WEEKS. I would simply tell them what you told us - "We are so sorry, but the RSVP date has long since passed and we have already finalized our head count with our caterer. We wish we had heard from you sooner!" I'm sure you already gave them more than enough time to respond.

I don't think it is unreasonable to tell them "too late". They knew when the RSVP date was and unless there was some sort of emergency or something else preventing them from RSVPing on time then you don't have to let them come.

You've already given the final headcount to the venue and to change the seating chart around now would put a lot of stress on you so close to the wedding when I'm sure you have a lot of other things to do!

Just politely tell them that you're sorry but the RSVP date passed and you've already given the venue the final headcount and they can't accommodate more guests.

Did you follow up with this person to see if they could come? We will be paying for extra seats just in case this happens, but if you’ve already submitted your head count then I would tell them you can’t accommodate them

Personally I dont think it matters wether you followed up or not 3 weeks is way too late. I would Just tell them that unfortunately everything is paid for at this point. We do have a few extra seats for just In case people but we aren’t doing a seating chart.

I agree with some PP saying it doesn't matter if you followed up with them or not. Three weeks is too late. I understand where you're coming from with feeling bad, but they had plenty of time and notice. I would do what Melissa say something along those lines of "Sorry, but everything is finalized and paid for. Would love to have had you there, but we wish we heard from you sooner!" This is not on you. Like a PP said, unless there was an emergency, this is on them.

View Quoted Comment I agree with this post. It’s nice to follow-up with everyone who didn’t respond, but it’s not mandatory and OP has every right to say it’s too late whether or not she followed-up with the guest.

Not a jerk at all. Just be as polite about it as they were rude.

Politely tell them NO! I don’t think people understand the importance of RSVP’n, so it’s expected BUT you don’t have to bend your rules.

Not a jerk but why didnt you follow up on this person who didnt rsvp?

I'm a little confused by what you posted. Did you only send save the dates, not invitations? Because if it was just a save the date then I would definitely pay the extra cost since it's your fault for doing things in an odd way. I would expect most people to not respond, as they would be expecting an invitation to arrive.

If you just misworded your post and did send invitations then I think it's okay to just tell them you already handed in final numbers but you should definitely follow up with anyone else you didn't hear from that since you didn't hear from then, you had to mark them as a no and hope to catch up soon. You don't want any more surprises.

Tell them you already paid the final pmt. They can make a deadline in a RSVP. Their loss.

Honestly I would make the exception. I assume you invited this person because you wanted them there. Life happens and plans change. I wouldn’t necessarily go out of my way to do a new seating chart, but I would try to find a way to fit them in. ** I’m also confused about he STD and whether or not you followed up on the RSVP.

You set a date for a reason. And you should stand firm with it.

I think she meant to say due date of the RSVPS rather than the save the dates. I would tell them sorry, but you've given final counts. It's not your fault.

Hi Courtney! Did you warn them as the deadline for RSVPs passed? It's up to you, how you proceed, if you want these guests at your wedding or not.

View Quoted Comment I did follow up. Never got a response.

View Quoted Comment I’m confused where you’re getting this info from, Kiwi? I sent out invites.

Sorry I mistakenly put “save the dates” instead of “invite RSVPS”

and I did follow up with all guests. I just didn’t get responses from many.

View Quoted Comment I got the info from your post. You're the one who said the due date from your save the dates. That's why I questioned what you meant because it was odd and gave you feedback based on both what you wrote and what you probably meant to write. Since you've clarified, you can just disregard the first part of my answer as it's now irrelevant