KWR: Do you feel like you're too fat to be photographed?

That is a horrifying concept. There is a wonderful, wonderful episode of This American Life that just went on podcast; it's called "I am fat". Required listening for everyone.

http://www.thisamericanlife.org/radio-archives/episode/589/tell-me-im-fat

You mean the idea of someone being "too fat" to be photographed? Then yes, absolutely.

Thanks for sharing the podcast - I'll be sure to give it a listen!

@BeachyLauren you're welcome! And I can't wait to see a sneak peek of your epics - you're gonna look gorgeous!

I've been feeling too fat lately. I got to my lowest weight in my adult life last year (lost 132 pounds) and I felt on top of the world. I actually didn't mind pictures. And then I had a lot of stress placed on me so I gained about 30 pounds. And then I found out I was pregnant and I gained about 60 more pounds. I destroyed all of my hard work in the matter of a year. Yes I was pregnant but I gained way more weight than I wanted to or needed to. I had my daughter 3 weeks ago and I've already lost about 30 pounds but I am no where near where I wanted to be on my wedding day and my wedding dress doesn't even fit now. I have absolutely no clothes that fit me and I just want to stay in my home all summer rather than wear dresses and shorts that show my big thighs and arms. I took tons of photos of my FH and our daughter but I only have 3 of me and her and they only show my face. I hope I can feel more comfortable taking pictures by the time my wedding rolls around.

You know I'm ancient, and I wish I had the mental real estate back that I spent thinking I was fat....and the actuality of it has nothing to do with my belief. In my adult life I've been at every weight from 105 lbs to 270, at around 5.7" (and now I'm shrinking...great news there) and I never, ever felt fine with myself.

Be healthy, eat what you want within reason, moisturize and be happy for every day you get to wake up. the number between your feet is just not that important.

@Antonia thank you so much for sharing. I actually started tearing up reading the article because its absolutely true.

I'll admit that I have and am on that boat, I'm trying to lose 10-15lbs because I don't want to look "fat" in our wedding pictures. And currently I hate taking photos because of the way I look when I see it (double chin and just puffy face is what I see).

I never really thought about what family members see when they look at photos. And I guess you could say I don't take FH seriously when he tells me "I love you no matter what. You could weigh 200lbs, have one leg, have one arm...but nothing will ever change how much I love you". I was just so caught up in the moment of being skinny, and reminiscing on old photos of high school days or after graduating.

So thank you again for sharing...its definitely a wake up call.

@Celia if you are anything like me, I see pictures from 20 years ago -- when I *already* thought I was too fat -- and think how amazing I looked.

I almost killed my grandmother for posting this picture of me on Facebook (I'm in red). I wanted to call and tell her to delete it immediately, but I know why she loves it. It's all the grandkids (& 2 great grands) that she has. She loves us. And doesn't see us as "fat" in this pic. I don't love my body, and I don't love this picture, but I'm glad it exists for the other people in my life who do love it.

This is a great thread, Antonia, and also thanks to Celia for sharing the podcast; I'll be sure to listen as well! So many people struggle with body image and weddings seem to bring it out in the worst ways.

@ Pani, YES!

I am 70-80lbs overweight d/t thyroid issues. I eat healthy and work out, but unless your thyroid functions correctly, it doesn't help the weight.

I hate the way I look, especially in photographs. I already know I'm going to hate my wedding pictures. It's something I'll have to learn to live with.

@Antonia thank you so much for sharing this article. I personally have gained weight and have had so much trouble accepting it. The funny thing is when i look back at pictures and i see how skinny i used to be and back then i used to think i was fat. I guess you are never happy with how you see yourself and sometimes you just need to stop look at yourself and love yourself.

Great topic. It's funny (well, I guess sad really) that every age and every weight, I always felt self-conscious and like I was too fat. I literally remember this since I was about 10 years old at least. Most of the time, I only get bigger as time goes on. I guess it's definitely a waste to worry about. Wasted time and energy when we could have just been in the moment and enjoying it. I need to try to just be mindful and in the moment always, but especially for my wedding.

Thank you for sharing this! I gained 50 pounds during my last pregnancy and never lost it all. I feel confident in how I look UNTIL I am photographed.

I know I've mentioned her before but Brittney Herself has a great blog and book "Fat Girl Walking". Her attitude is such an inspiration for me.

Funny thing is, knowing I don't like the way I look in photographs and despite having a minuscule wedding, I still pushed for a photographer.

So glad that this was able to help some of you!

Thanks for sharing! I have always been hyper critical of myself. Borderline body dysmorphic disorder. It's definitely a struggle. I am still learning to love my body. I am torn about our E-pics and terrified I'll hate the way i look in our wedding pictures. In the end though FH is super photogenic and I'll treasure the photos forever.

This just made me smile and was a very powerful realization about what FH sees or our son or our families! I hate that as women and humans we get so hard on ourselves that we let it affect and run our lives! This was a good reminder to not let it do so from now on and especially on our wedding days! Happy beautiful bodies ya'll!

Sometimes I care, sometimes I don't.

When I was super heavy in college, I didn't care. I didn't really care UNTIL 2010. I dropped a lot of weight, and then started to put it back on in 2009. I don't like many of my wedding and engagement photos because of the weight I put back on - at least, so I thought. I realize now that I was absolutely miserable during that time (long story, but death, miscarriage, grad school and such contributed). And my husband and I don't have a lot of photos together because of it.

Now that I've started losing weight again, I'm not running from the camera. It's funny - when I was this weight 3 years ago, I dodged cameras because I was so unhappy with putting the weight back on. Now I'm the same weight again (having gone up and back down 45 pounds), but since I'm happier, I'm not dodging them. I'm still much heavier than I was in 2008, but I feel happier than I did.

I loved this. Thank you.

@celia this is wonderful advice, and exactly what I needed to hear today! This whole thread is exactly what I needed!