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Gwendolyn
Just Said Yes September 2020

Is this redneck for a wedding?

Gwendolyn, on December 18, 2019 at 12:57 AM Posted in Wedding Reception 0 76

My fiance and I had decided on doing a cookout for our wedding reception but his coworkers have him convinced that it is trashy and redneck to have a cookout. (We're doing it at a state park in Georgia next April) We don't have a huge budget since we just had a baby in June but he was so excited about the cookout idea until he talked to his coworkers about it, now he acts like it's the most embarrassing thing ever. I wanted to decorate mason jars for the cups/party favors but I'm really worried about him being more embarrassed. Are these ideas too trashy even on a small budget?

76 Comments

Latest activity by Jana, on April 15, 2020 at 5:29 PM
  • Erin
    VIP September 2023
    Erin ·
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    I'm making spaghetti with a basic meat sauce, and a basic Caesar salad for our reception food. I'm on a budget too, and I wasn't about to spend half of it on food. Our dinner will cost all of about $200 for 60 people, and I know it'll be good because it will be prepared by us.

    I've noticed that things that don't cost thousands of dollars and aren't "fancy" are considered "tacky" and "redneck" in the wedding world. Do what makes you happy, and what fits into your budget and screw what anyone else thinks about it, especially coworkers.

    I have one coworker who loves to poo on my wedding plans. She heard that we were planning on having the ceremony at Rocky Mountain National Park, which is at a fairly high altitude (although Denver isn't exactly at sea level either), and her main comment was "why don't you have your wedding somewhere where you guests will actually enjoy being?" Maybe because I love the outdoors, and the mountains, and a $4,000 room doesn't really fit into my budget...

    The point is, naysayers will always be there, but you do what makes you happiest. And congratulations on your baby Smiley smile

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  • Kristen
    Master November 2020
    Kristen ·
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    I say unless they're gonna hand 🖐️ over some cash screw them. Look up rustic reception amd you'll get some ideas. Not everyone has a budget for lavish receptions. Do what you both want. They don't like it they don't come. My friend did publix platters for her reception at her club house and at first i thought that sounded ghetto but I never said anything. It turned out nicer than expected.
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  • M
    Expert September 2020
    Marcia ·
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    I think doing something different from the typical wedding and reception can be fun and memorable. It’s also a “know your crowd” kind of thing.
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  • Gloria
    Devoted May 2023
    Gloria ·
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    I don't think that your ideas sound trashy at all! We will be having barbecue food for our reception and we're getting married in a park too.

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  • Merline
    Super February 2020
    Merline ·
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    Please do not listen to his coworkers. As everyone is saying do what you're able to do. Do not go broke trying to please anyone. 5 years ago one of my dear friends had chick fil a platters and ribs and sides from Jim N Nick's at her reception. There were about 20 of us there. I mean, we all know and love chick fil and jim n Nick's. She had lots of mason jars, which we just as cups that we were able to keep.
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  • Jai
    VIP May 2020
    Jai ·
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    I like the cookout idea! Definitely do it. Its simple, relaxing, and it sounds comfortable. I've learned people will always have opinions, especially those who aren't contributing! Go with what you want!
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  • Kristen
    Master November 2020
    Kristen ·
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    Soooo I assume you are not inviting her lol. We all may look at an aspect of someone's wedding we do not personally life but keep it to yourself. Be glad you were included in such an important day in my opinion. Gosh...adults! LOL

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  • Jennifer
    Super March 2020
    Jennifer ·
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    What is trashy is people talking down to you on what you can provide for your guests. I have heard that some of the best weddings are the most simple. They are centered around the actual marriage and a fun dinner for friends and family. Usually weddings with an entertainment crew, crazy foods,a nd more are just seen as a way to show boat, but doesnt allow people to relax. Do what you want!
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  • Sherry
    Master September 2019
    Sherry ·
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    Not trashy at all. People will always have an opinion on what you do. If that is what you want, go for it! I can guarantee they will come and eat, drink and have a great time.


    Oh and hi fellow Ga bride!!

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  • Springbride
    Dedicated 0000
    Springbride ·
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    Your wedding can be anything you want it to be, its about marrying your love. Personally I wouldn't invite coworkers who are being negative about something he was and should be excited about. your wedding will be amazing because it will be about the two of you!

    screw those negative nancys!

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  • M
    Legend June 2019
    Melle ·
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    Your mason jar idea sounds super cute actually

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  • Haley
    Expert October 2020
    Haley ·
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    I think as long as you're having a small wedding (maybe 50 people?) it should work out fine!

    People in these forums usually frown upon self catered weddings.

    I think what most people envision (and maybe this is true with the coworkers too) is someone trying to cook for a large crowd of 150 people for the first time on their wedding day.

    As long as everything is prepared with food safety in mind (prepared correctly, safe temperatures kept at all times, etc) it should be fine!
    People grill/cook out for parties all the time with like 50 people and it works out fine! I just personally would be afraid to do it for a large wedding.

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  • Catherine
    VIP November 2019
    Catherine ·
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    This is not trashy or "redneck". i think its a great idea - and i guess those coworkers don't need an invitation to your day!! i think its a great idea. i love cookouts and BBQs. mason jars are such a popular wedding item also. do what you guys can afford! what other people think doesn't matter. and if they don't like it they don't have to come.

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  • Nikki
    Dedicated December 2020
    Nikki ·
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    Do what you want to do! If they don't like it, they have 3 options: pay for the food themselves, not go, or go and shut up (if they are invited). It's your wedding and you do what you want! I think its a lovely idea, and if my parents didn't offer to pay for the reception, I'd probably be doing the same!
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  • Andrea
    Master January 2021
    Andrea ·
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    This post makes me so sad because it sucks how judgmental some folks can be. I'm really sorry these coworkers are being very rude. We're having Chinese food at our wedding, and I know... it's not really "wedding" food but it's good food and very affordable for us. We don't have a ton of help. We're doing mainly everything on our own with some help from my mom and my FMIL in regards to food and drink. Guests need to be happy that firstly they are getting an invite. Secondly, they are getting fed. They will be entertained. What else do they possibly need? I really hope these coworkers aren't invited to your wedding. LOL I mean they are already judging it. I don't like discussing my wedding plans with certain people because you can inadvertently invite unwanted criticism. Don't stress, and go forward with your intended plans. Everything will work out in your favour. Smiley heart

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  • Kari
    Master May 2020
    Kari ·
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    One of my co-workers was telling me the best wedding he ever went to was one where all the groomsmen wore camo vests and jeans and instead of tables everyone sat on hay bales. Now that's a redneck wedding! But it was also his favorite wedding. Everyone has different tastes and what should be important is that your wedding feels right to you.

    I don't think there is anything wrong with a cookout. Cookouts can feel really casual and fun, or intimate and personal. And you can serve whatever you want for food and make it really upscale if you want to. Anyway, I'd much rather have a really good steak or pig roast at a cookout in a park than sit down to an expensive meal that isn't cooked well or doesn't taste good. One of the most expensive, over the top weddings we've gone to was at this beautiful exclusive old money resort and many of the guests were served undercooked (raw in the middle) chicken and had to send their food back.

    You do you. Do not let what his coworkers said influence you. Are they even invited to the wedding anyway? If not, I'd definitely not worry about it, and if they were on the list, you might want to reconsider.

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  • Kari
    Master May 2020
    Kari ·
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    RMNP is beautiful and people who don't like it don't need to go to your wedding. Smiley smile

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  • Erin
    VIP September 2023
    Erin ·
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    I agree. Even if the altitude is going to bother people, they're all from sea level, just landing in the airport could bother people. I'm not going to let that bother me.

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  • Jasmin
    Dedicated July 2020
    Jasmin ·
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    So many people are doing this now, it's not trashy. I personally don't like the rustic theme but it's your day not mine or theirs! Don't go in debt and don't let others make you feel bad. Like those before me said, if they aren't paying they can shush Smiley smile

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  • Kari
    Master May 2020
    Kari ·
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    Altitude affects everyone differently, but one thing is for sure, being well hydrated is essential to handling increases in altitude well. I'd definitely make sure you have a lot of water on hand for guests, and encourage them to drink it too, and not just alcohol. Nothing makes altitude worse than dehydration and a hangover.

    I know you are aiming to save money, but it might not be a bad idea to have a welcome pack that includes a bottle of water and some individually packed ibuprofen for fending off a headache, or at least maybe include some in a bowl that guests can grab if they want to instead of making each guest/couple their own bag.


    I cannot remember what the elevation of RMNP is, but altitude related illness of concern rarely occurs below 8,000 feet, so at lower elevations your guests might be fine.

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