i do/i don’t

Zero time in 5 years together. The trick is to learn how to work through an issue together

Zero
Probably not a good sign if you have had some break ups

Zero times since we started dating!

Zero for us.

View Quoted Comment This response is perfect! Said just what I was thinking.

Never, not even close.

Heck, I knew I would marry him before we'd been dating a month. Waited 7 years, but knew it all along.

If you deal with problems by breaking up, marriage is... not the best choice.

Zero. I have never doubted my relationship with him since the day we met. We are not perfect and we have normal arguments (as every couple does) but we communicate and work through them. Never threaten a break up.

We broke up once in our five year relationship. We were apart for about 7 months due to us both having things to work on as individuals. In the end the time apart helped us learn a lot about ourselves and each other. We’ve decided we do want to do premarital counseling but I honestly don’t think we would’ve made it to engagement without that time apart.

Zero. When things get hard we just remember we would rather be arguing and working things out than apart any day.

I won't pretend we have a perfect relationship. We broke up after we were together for 18 months and stayed broken up for 6 months. We've been together an additional 4 years after getting back together. We still fight but are 100% sure we want to journey thru this messy life together.

View Quoted Comment That’s wonderful to hear. I know couples have spats. But break up to make up is taxing.

View Quoted Comment I’ve considered that. We both moved to Texas. Had a house. I moved back to Philly for a job(we both were retired) and he sold the house and is moving up to Philly. I made accommodations for my mother to have her own place. Finally with a little pushing, she moved. But he decided to stay with family until she did. Now he says I put my family first and not him. He should not have had to stay with his brother if he cake all the way back to be my husband.

View Quoted Comment Omg. I’m starting to feel like I’m the only one 😔

View Quoted Comment It’s been almost 5 years. We’ve broken up a few times while dating. But this time as an engaged couple was the most devastating.

View Quoted Comment I totally agree. It’s just that calling the venue and losing my deposit and the hardest, giving back the ring. I can’t even bring myself to remove our pictures from this site or my phone or my office desk.

View Quoted Comment Consider that as a blessing.

View Quoted Comment I agree. Divorce would not be an option. So I would not want to get married only to divorce.

View Quoted Comment Wonderful
I really want every bride and groom to have joy in their lives.

View Quoted Comment

Some venues will allow you to change your wedding date so you don't lose your deposit. If you're at the point though that you feel it necessary to remove pictures of him, I think that's a tell-tale sign that a wedding between you two might not be the best decision for you. Things only get more difficult in marriage (I know I make it sound daunting), but it's important to know that the trails you'll face as husband and wife are more significant than in the dating phase. I would talk to him about what to do with the ring. Some men ask for it back and some will tell you to keep it. My sister's ex-fiance (she's now happily married with 2 sons) had her keep the ring; though he cheated on her so it was almost like compensation for the emotional damage. Part of growing as a couple and people is being able to talk about even the most difficult things.

View Quoted Comment Thank you for your honesty. Ryan and I have been friends for 35 years or more. We were high school sweethearts. We reconnected 5 years ago. It’s been ups and downs. Good far outweighed bad. It’s delicate because Rye is a recovering addict. He’s dead on with expressing his feelings. I’m more passive now. I try not to hurt feelings. Including moms, dads(since passed) sons and more importantly Rye’s. But at times, I wanted to expedite things for mom to get her own place after dad passed. Her income was not that great. Since I had a pension and now a new career, I took care of everything. I offered mom help with her monthly rent so when Rye came, it would be just us two. Rye sees that as accommodating her instead of him. I agree at some point. But it’s mom. I can’t just leave mom hanging. And now mom has her place, and has a pastor that is interested in her and I’m all alone