How to include 16 year old in wedding

That's a little too old to be a flower girl, but she could be a junior bridesmaid!

Are there any special things you're doing for your ceremony? She could do a reading?

Maybe she can do a reading or hand out programs.

Junior bridesmaid! Maybe she can do a speech or something unique if you have that option!

I would make her a junior bridesmaid.

My partner’s 12 yr old also wants to be included. I initially asked her to be a flower girl but that was a flat no from her haha. Apparently she’s too ‘old’ to be a flower girl so I just made her bridesmaid. Doesn’t really bother me and she’s happy so win-win 😊

She could be a jr. Bridesmaid. That was my intention with a friend's teenage daughter (until COVID changed our plans). I just planned on making sure that any bridal activities were appropriate or had an option for someone who is underage.

It's probably already been said, but my first thought is junior bridesmaid. My FH's niece is 12, and she's a junior bridesmaid. It's a nice way for inclusion. If that's too much for her, if you're doing a dollar dance, you could have her hold the dollar basket, but that might be too small of a role.

I understand the idea of being "too old" for a flower girl but there's technically no rules. For a while the "flower grandma" trend was popular. If she feels comfortable/wants the role then I'd lean into it with a flower print (color matching wedding party) gown, flower crown, maybe some lace up sandals or wedges with little flowers, the whole shebang lol. It could be gorgeous!


However, if she felt too old/uncomfortable then a jr bridesmaid is a great option! If you're doing a bachelorette I'd have an pre-party of something she can do (dinner, mani pedi? Spa day at home?) Then have her get picked up before the adult themed stuff.

For those suggesting the junior bridesmaid role: what's the difference with a normal bridesmaid? Don't they have the same 'duty' (ie standing next to you at the altar) and don't they wear the same colour? I get that they obviously don't join the adults part of the bachelorette but essentially aren't they just bridesmaids?

View Quoted Comment Haha yes! This is my question as well. I guess junior just refers to age 🤷🏻‍♀️

View Quoted Comment I appreciate this! I see and appreciate the suggestions of junior bridesmaid, but I was planning on having her walk down the aisle and then taking a seat. My FH is already having a tough time picking groomsmen because he’s not very close to anyone and I know he’s pretty self conscious about my side being bigger than his. I only have two bridesmaids right now and he has someone as his best man, but I’m not sure he’s choosing anyone else. I don’t mind uneven sides at all, but I don’t want him to feel bad that I have a trail of supporters behind me and he only has his one friend, you know?

Have the usher escort her down the aisle as one of the VIPs and/or let her organize the bridal shower.

View Quoted Comment Totally understand- I am having my MOH and FH isn't having anyone. My best friend moved back home and now I want two people but have the same worry 😖


I say do what you both want! ☺️

A flowergirl generally is not older than 9. She could be a jr bridesmaid but I would not add her just to fill a role. Can she hand out programs and be your guestbook attendant? Ushers are typically groomsmen duty but that's also an option as long as she has a partner to work with. Readings are usually done by the officiant and not everyone is comfortable with public speaking..plus the awkward lag of shuffling out of a seat and walking up to the front. Otherwise just let her be a guest.