How Far In Advance Should You Ask Your Flower Girls/Ring Bearers/Ceremony Readers?

Depends on the age. If I asked my 4 year old to be my flower girl now, she'd assume every single day is my wedding and be READY, and I'd have to constantly remind her that it's not time yet. If they're older you can ask them whenever makes sense for you, and makes sense for getting the outfit and preparing. If they're younger I'd bring it up with their parents at an earlier date, but wait until the day is closer to bring it up to them.

We asked our flower girl, ring bearer, and junior bridesmaid all at once last November. Super early, but they're FH's nieces and nephew so it was kind of assumed they would be in it. The 6 year old nephew said no 😂 so we plan on asking him again closer to the date, because he is old enough to decide whether he actually wants to or not. We haven't really discussed anything in-depth with their parents because we've still got a lot of time to order kids outfits.

6 months in advance is probably pretty good, that way the parents have time to prepare and plan, but it's not so far out that kids are waiting for like a year if they're super excited lol.

We asked the parents of the FG/RB about a year out. The mom of the FG sends me pictures of cute dresses, we'll probably reach out again around 6 months out about outfits and just to double check. We don't want them to feel obligated.

View Quoted Comment That is a good point about the flower girls and ring bearers not fully understanding when the wedding is and how long they'd have to wait! What amount of time in advance should they be asked? A couple months ahead of time? Or 6 months? And what about ceremony readers?

View Quoted Comment Oh my gosh 😂 I can't believe the 6 year old said no! Hopefully he changes his mind when you ask again, lol. 6 months in advance seems reasonable for flower girl and ring bearer! Do you have any thoughts on how far in advance the ceremony readers should be asked?

View Quoted Comment Aww, awesome that the mom of the flower girl sends you dress ideas! How far in advance do the flowers girl dresses normally need to be ordered? I'm thinking I might ask around the 6 month mark (which is crazy to think it's coming up so quick!), but want to make sure that leaves enough time for dresses. How far in advance should ceremony readers be asked?

We asked our flower girls at Thanksgiving (which was about 5 months out), but talked to my future sister-in-law about asking her daughters a few months before that (They live out of state).

View Quoted Comment 5 months out seems reasonable! How long does it normally take for the flower girl dresses to come in? I'm thinking I'll ask flower girl and ring bearers around the 6 month mark, though unsure about when to ask the ceremony readers. Should they be asked at the same time as the flower girl and ring bearers? Or much closer to the ceremony, since they don't have any particular outfits that they need to order?

Wait until as close to the wedding as possible. 3 months is plenty of time to order a dress. A reader can be asked around the time that invites are sent at 2 months. Don’t ask earlier than that because relationships do change over time and you can’t revoke the position without ending the relationship.

View Quoted Comment 3-6 months in advance seems to be the most popular time frame for flower girl and ring bearers! Based on everyone's responses so far, I'm thinking I'll ask flower girl and ring bearers in the 5-6 month time frame. Around 2 months in advance seems reasonable for the ceremony readers! At this point in my engagement (been wedding planning for 2.5 years), I don't anticipate that my friendships will change between now and my wedding, though I will probably still wait to ask the ceremony readers until time gets closer.

View Quoted Comment I asked my future SIL to order their flower girl dresses by January/February (so, if needed, they have plenty of time for alterations). We are currently looking at JJ’s House, as they have a wide selection (especially if you also search under their junior bridesmaid dresses). Their estimated production time is 6-8 days and then an additional 3-5 days to ship.

View Quoted Comment Oh wow, that's a quick turnaround time on the dresses! Thank you so much for the info!

View Quoted Comment Amazon also a huge selection without overseas shipping. Holiday dresses at the local Macy’s/Dillards/Costco for sale now are a great option as well. Be aware that kids grow fast so better to get a larger size they can grow into.

View Quoted Comment Good point on avoiding the overseas shipping! That would definitely help get the dresses here sooner. I plan to ask the ring bearers/flower girl with plenty of notice, so that they won't have to rush to buy attire.