Hotel room block

View Quoted Comment I wouldn’t do a block then. We didn’t because hotels in my city don’t do courtesy blocks and our wedding planner told us not to do anything where we would be held financially responsible. We live in a city where even the crappy Motel 6 is over $200 a night so I get it. It was easier to let people figure out their own accommodations and we provided a shuttle from a central location.

I am having a little trouble following all this, but it sounds like you need "guests" to stay a the hotel to pay for your reception. Many people have wised up to the DW at an all-inclusive, the "guests" pay for the party, or at least most of it. I would not expect my "guests" or should I say "sponsors" to pay for my party. You should talk this over with parents and siblings. If they are willing to cover the 10 rooms, I would tell them absolutely no present. I would think long and hard about covering those 10 rooms.

Yes, $400 is too much, ESPECIALLY when asking guests to travel for a DW. Find $150-$200 options for them. Or, cover $350 per night of your hotel block if you want your VIP guests to stay there.

I am paying for my guests at my destination wedding in Miami. it's not a lot of people, but that's protocol. They pay their own airfare and I cover the hotel. We will have an arrival early pre fixe supper, and the next morning everyone orders their own breakfast. I will have an early day wedding followed by appetizers, sandwhiches and mimosas at the beach at 11:30AM and then have a reception party at one of the beachside restaurants with dancing, drinks and a full course meal in the evening. Other than welcome bags, that's it.

If they are paying, you have to give them options. I would give them 3 options of nearby hotels and tell them they should choose what they want and forget about getting a "block." Forcing them to pay $400 may mean they won't attend.

I realize you may be covering welcome dinner or other expenses, but rethink this. It's really expensive.

I don't understand the welcome party. Is the cost merely an upgrade from the usual meals at an all-inclusive? Is the welcome party basically the same as a rehearsal dinner, for the wedding party and parents? I cannot tell I OP is young and naïve, and does not understand that she is not really paying for these things? Maybe if she would come back and explain, is this an all inclusive, and she is just paying for upgrades? Not the same as paying for the RD and the ceremony/reception.

If the place is not an all-inclusive, this makes no sense. My cousin had her DW at an all-inclusive. She said people could stay where they wanted, and she paid for a day pass for anyone staying elsewhere so they could attend the wedding (and btw, a less expensive hotel + day pass was cheaper than the all inclusive place). I still stayed at the all inclusive, but some of her friends did not.

View Quoted Comment Please don’t suggest that I’m “young & naive”. I appreciate the advice but I can do w/o your negative comments. It’s not an all-inclusive & I’m not having a bridal party so that eliminates the rehearsal dinner.

Fine, then I will leave it at, you are asking people to spend a lot of money. And it makes no sense that you need X number of guests in order to pay for your wedding. Maybe not an all inclusive, maybe just all meals included. It makes no sense that you need a certain number of guests. You are pushing costs on your guests. Don't do it

View Quoted Comment You are basically asking them to subsidize the cost of your wedding venue. That is considered rude, no matter how much money your guests have as income.

Wow I think some of these comments are on the harsh side. A destination wedding, even at an all inclusive, still requires the bride and groom to pay for a number of services. I don’t agree that it is passing costs onto the guests, though it does increase the costs to guests. There is nothing wrong with having a destination wedding, and OP shouldn’t be attacked for making that choice. It’s your wedding, have the wedding that YOU want.

I personally, would have to decline on the RSVP. That's a lot of money

Guests will also have to cover flights, food and a gift for you. If they are in the wedding party they have to pay for their attire.

I would notify everyone asap, so they can know what to expect. If you go that route, be prepared for the fact that your guest count may be low because of the required rooms and the price.

Good luck ! Hope it works out for you

There are different types of destination weddings, but if the venue is saying that in order to have the wedding there, the bride and groom need to book a certain number of rooms there, yep, they are pushing costs on the "guests."

OP's original question was how do I tell my guests that they have to stay at the $400 a night venue without saying it like that. No way. She has to say, you are invited to my wedding, but you are to stay at the LuxHotel. My opinion, she is far better talking to family to see if she can drum up 10 pidgeons. If she cannot get 10 close family to agree to 400/night, I think she needs to let it go.

ETA -- OP if you can get parents, maybe any stepparents, a few aunts or uncles, siblings to add up to say 7-8 rooms, you should be OK. But if not, you need to let this go.

View Quoted Comment Good luck! I hope they will work with you! Maybe you can pay some of the cost for the room? If its something that you will end up being stuck paying even if they arent filled, maybe you can take that percentage and pay it so that it will be better for your guests and easier on their wallets

Are there other hotels in the area? The hotel I am using does an 'open block,' so I didn't need to reserve a certain number; I just got a negotiated rate of $89 and once the hotel occupancy hits 85%, the rate goes away. I personally wouldn't pay that much to stay at a hotel for a wedding and would find a cheaper option if I were invited.

Yes, I did ask that followed by “am I asking to much?” You clearly think I am, so like you said in your previous post, leave it at that.

View Quoted Comment Thank you Lauren! I don’t know why some people feel like it’s necesary to be rude, even if they don’t agree. 🤷🏻‍♀️

I’ve read other brides who’ve had similar situations and it’s just a difficult one. That is a lot of money and you can’t force someone to stay at that particular resort. I personally would not attend due to all of those expenses adding up. I’m afraid others might feel that and then you’re left footing the bill in the end! Best of luck!

I know it doesn’t sound too good for your guests to hear this but I think the best option for them is to find their own hotels. $400 a night is pretty pricey unless your guests can throw $400 away like that. It may sound rude to tell them “hey find your own hotel” but at the end, they won’t have to pay $400 for a room and they’ll appreciate you for that.

It depends on the DW.. where is it?? If it’s in the states I wouldn’t travel from one state to another and pay $400 for one night.. we’re having a DW to Cancún, we got a travel agent and our guests will be paying about $230 per night for an all inclusive resort.. I have given everyone a heads up and surprisingly everyone has said yes.. we didn’t do a room block because it seem more complicated and hard to organize, knowing how many room, the type of room and how many nights, plus I’d have to pay out of pocket first and then get reimbursed as my guests booked.. anyways, it depends on your guests if they’re willing to pay $400 per night for the destination..

View Quoted Comment

I do not mean to be critical but I think you are missing OP's point. She needs to have 10 rooms booked to pay for her wedding. She is only inviting 30 people. To me, that is at most 16 rooms (one for her and DH) and most people will share a room. Even worse, some younger friends may share 4 to a room. Some people may not come due to the cost, others because of the time (not everyone can get vacation at any time). OP may have to extend guest list to get the 10 rooms she needs. She may end up not with her closest friends, but people with time and money (think her parents generation). She might want to go on line and search problems with destination weddings.

View Quoted Comment You’re right because I don’t know the relationship or situations of her guests. I’m just trying to think of an alternative where she will not have to stress over that.