Guestzilla and Vendorzilla

I'll start.

Vendorzilla: I was called cheap by a venue rep because I tried to negotiate for 2010 prices (I would have signed in September 2010) for Oct 2011.

Guestzillas: We were also told to change the date because FS parents didn't want to be chilly (average temp would be mid-60s) and then again because my MOH, who got engaged after us and wanted a spring/summer wedding (their date is still not yet picked).

I also have to respond weekly to a colleague as to why I wouldn't want my dog in the wedding ceremony (that is great for some, not for us). And have been put on the spot by a few people, they ask about the wedding, I state it is going to be intimate and small and change the subject, they immediately ask "so I'll be invited, right?".

@Noei - I can't believe the audacity of that guest. I think I would have had to uninvite him.

Noei, I just don't get how he would think that is OK. Even if it wasn't an expensive, invite only, emotionally charged event, it is just shocking that he would ask you to be rude on his behalf!

The first time it happened, I was flabergasted and responded "yes, of course!" and added them to the list. I learned from that mistake and now repeat "we are planning an intimate wedding" and chanign the subject. I also avoid wedding talk within earshot of anyone who may not be invited.

I had a wedding where the guests got a little bored and hungry so they cut the cake...without the bride and groom! We shot another wedding where the cake feeding resulted in a food fight which cost the bride and groom $5000 in cleaning costs because there was frosting on the floor and walls.

LOL!

I'm not at this stage yet, but I already know the true colors will come out.

I love this topic.

Vendorzilla.....I was told I was being cheap because I wanted to sign a contract guaranteeing the food costs from a caterer. She said she could only "guestimate" because food prices were going to go up in 2011. No, I was not asking for seafood, but rather, pasta, chicken marsala and salad. Since it is a buffet, I asked if the leftovers were boxed. I was told no, that she cushions enough for everyone to eat, and what was left belonged to her. Well, when I went for my tasting with another caterer(in Vermont), I found out why she wouldn't let us have the leftovers. Apparently, she sells them to a local grocery. I saw half of the things on my menu in a lunchmeat counter for sale. I won't even discuss the B&B owner, who also has a restaurant and wanted to charge $67 for a tray of baked ziti that would feed 10 people only. Huh? A tray of ziti costs about $10 to make and feeds about 25 people.

Thus far, I have not had any guestzillas...thank goodness.

Carole, I'm in shock she can resell food like that!

After a few vendors stepped over the line, my FS and I agreed to work only with people who treated us with respect and appeared to have honest practices (one caterer requested cash only and offered a discount equavalent to the taxes), even if we have to pay a little more.

I'm very happy your guests are reasonable! You are lucky!

Annoying photographer with a loud clickety camera and a big ego.

@Future....I was very suprised as well. From what I From what I understand, in Vermont, as long as a portion has not been taken out of the tray, it is okay to resell. But, the portions were def missing from the items we saw in the store. I think she was the owner of the store as well.

Yes, we decided to only work with vendors who we actually liked and felt a rapport with. You have no idea how much of a nightmare it was to find one. Apparently, a wedding with a max of 60 people was not enough for some of the high brow caterers in Vermont. I found a gal who is just starting out, so she is eager. An eager vendor is a good vendor. She is coming with a staff of 4(for 60 people) and will act as Day of Coordinator/help decorating as well.

Guestzilla -- One of my first cousins stole my original wedding date (6/11/11). We had just changed it to 5/7/11 since we want it outside, but we hadn't announced the change, and not 2 weeks before she stole our date I had informed her what our date was since she asked because she and her FS were trying to pick a date as well. Karma is a bitch though because the venue she really really wanted was booked on 6/11/11 so she is having to find a new venue or pick another date. I announced our new date, so she can't steal it this time without looking like a bitch, which she is. Her mom (my mom's sister) has always tried to one-up us -- we bought our house, they remodeled theirs, we bought a used car, they would go buy a new car, etc.

Vendorzilla -- I was shopping around on Etsy for someone to make me a digital copy of an invitation design back when I was going to do them myself. This lady gave me a quote, but when I told her I wouldn't need her services after all (in a very (cont'd)

I have some truely truely amazing vendors that far out way the one bad one. They have honestly bent over backwards for me which suprised the heck out of me because I'd always heard that you mention wedding and the cost goes up... I did have some tricky spots. One rental place went up in cost because of the oil spill (I switched places and the new rental vendor is amazing, one of the ones that bent over backwards for me! I had wanted orange table cloth with pink over lap but realized that it really wasn't in budget. She called around and worked things out for me so that I could have it and stay on budget!!! I will recommend popcorn rental for the rest of my life!). Caterer lost family members and was in an accident so had to back out but I managed to find a replacement and they are willing to do a gluten-free menu. Officent three months to the wedding backs out because his church is going to hold a saturday meeting that night but we found another one that is willing to do it and cont.

Professional manner) she acted like I stolen her firstborn or something. Said she felt taken advantage of. Lady, it was a freakin' quote. People ask for quotes all the time.

Back at the beginning I had gone into a local florist shop to inquire about prices. The guy flat out told me that their minimum wedding package is $1500 and that is just for ceremony flowers (bouquets, corsages, bouts). Um yeah, that's a negative. It's like it wasn't even up for negotiation. I took my business elsewhere.

And for the same price as the last officiant which is $150. She totally saved us!!... Nope it really hasn't been the vendors it's been My Momzilla. No fake flowers, not I don't like seafood, I want pearl jewelry just like yours because I love pearls and I don't care if his mother doesn't want them, make sure you put on the invite to your father that he is not to bring that *hore. Are you sure you don't want to just go to the courthouse?

On the vendor side, to guarantee prices a year in advance is really not a reasonable requests. The costs to the venue may very well increase. They purchase the food from various vendors and those vendors can (and do) raise prices.

As far as taking the leftover food. It is very common NOT to allow guests to remove any food from the venue. This is due to liability issues. If guests take leftovers, and do not properly store then, the venue could find themselves with liability issues when the guest(s) get sick.

It is tacky to find out that she then sells the meals to someone else.

I once witnessed a mild "war of the budget" between a mother of the bride and her "Wedding Planner." They came to my shop to price the wedding invitations the bride had chosen, and the MOB seemed a little put off by the cost of things. (I put the term "Wedding Planner" in quotations because this woman seemed a bit snarky to be an experienced professional.) Every suggestion I made regarding options to reduce their expense was shot down by the wedding planner with a sharp "That's Tacky!" I could tell by the look on the MOB's face that she was growing frustrated. This planner had her own idea of the budget, and it didn't seem to matter to her that the MOB was footing the bill. I felt bad for the bride's mom. This planner definitely seemed like what I would label as a Vendorzilla.

@cathryn- I think most photographers wish we could be completely silent however in order to take pictures we need that "annoying clickity clack" of the shutter.

I love it that my Aunt told her son that he could bring his 2 very poorly behaved kids to the wedding. When I told her the kids weren't invited she told me I had to call and tell him they weren't invited. Really? She made the call, she should undo it?

Dawn, if she invited them (not you) then she should explain to her son that she was mistaken. You should stay out of it.

Lisa, I'm still laughing over the food fight! I can't imagine what vendors have to deal with! After months of stressful planning and putting so much pressure on ourselves, vendors probably don't see the calm professional people most brides really are.