Ok, so this might be a bit of a long message sorry! I’m in the UK so I don’t know if customs are different but here you tend to have close family and friends to the ceremony and wedding breakfast and then your other friends to the reception. I used to be super close to this girl in university like joined at the hip close. When we left we moved 6 hours away and our friendship drifted apart. At first I would visit her every few months but she always had an excuse for why she couldn’t make the effort to see me. One time I went to the city she’s in to see some friends she doesn’t know. I told her I was coming but that I didn’t think I would be able to visit her due to seeing these other friends. She said she was fine with it but then when I was actually in the same city she sent me some really horrible messages saying how mean I was and how left out she felt etc. We then didn’t speak to each other for a year. About a year later she messaged me out of the blue saying ‘hey how are you’ and we carried on like nothing had ever happened. I don’t feel as close to her after we didn’t talk for a year as I feel like she blew it all out of proportion and was acting very childish. So I got engaged 2 weeks ago and she messaged me a week later asking if her and her bf (who I’ve never met) are invited? I should’ve replied I have no idea as I haven’t booked a venue yet but me being stupid and forgetting how quick she is to fly off the handle said that it will probably be just family and really close friends to the ceremony. I said her and her bf were 100% invited to the reception but I couldn’t promise that they were invited to the ceremony until I had booked a venue and worked out costings. She sent me a message seeing fine with it but then about 4 hours later sent me a massive message saying how hurt she was and was quite rude saying that she doesn’t want me to invite her to the ceremony now as she feels like second best, she also said if I want her at the reception she’ll try her best to make it...
I don’t know what to do?! Part of me wants to cut her out of my life completely as I have to walk on eggshells around her but the other part of me doesn’t want to throw our friendship away considering how close we used to be. The only way I think I can salvage our friendship however would be to invite her to the ceremony and reception and to grovel a lot. Even with lots of apologising from me she would probably be quite nasty back and take a lot of convincing to come to the ceremony. She would then probably have an issue with the fact that she is not bridesmaids etc. She messaged me on Wednesday this long message saying how she felt and I’ve just left it (it’s now Saturday) as I really don’t know what to do! Any help is much appreciated thank you
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