"Fishing" for the Garter

I had this same conversation with my FH! I figured after everything he's letting me take control of, I might as well let this happen. I'm going to be super uncomfortable so we are going to make it funny and weird for everyone! We choose an Al Green song and he is going to be doing a dumb dance while he "seduces me" then he'll climb under my comically huge dress. All while I am beat red in the face and making other people laugh.

Hopefully it'll be funny !

I've always thought it's a bit awkward. But I'm more weirded out by a random man trying to catch something that's been around my thigh all night. I have a big fluffy dress and I think him fishing for it could actually be a little fun. I think compromising and having it around your knee or even shin is a great idea. Especially if it's something he's looked forward to, my FH hasn't had many requests so I try to make them happen when he does.

To me it's only weird if he stays under there for so long or removes it with his teeth. If it's a quick second, I don't see the harm. Some people on here have said their grooms had the garter in their pocket and that they only pretended to reach for it....

I've never found this uncomfortable. But yes, I think around the knee or lower is a good compromise.

Some people make a show of it, that does make it a little weird, ask him not to do that!

It's not much that my FH gets excited about regarding the wedding planning. So if he showed interest in the garter toss, I'd do it. But that's us. If yours has alot of his own touches in the wedding, then maybe yall can still skip it since it makes you uncomfortable.

Can you compromise on something that makes you more comfortable? Like, I don't want to do the garter thing but I said yes to having FH introduce the wedding party with a "wrestling" intro.

We did the garter toys and he was only under the dress for a quick minute. The sing he chose was legs. It was so fast and I knew everyone at the wedding so it wasn't anyone random. We called all the men up because we didn't really have anyone single up there.

This garter thing has been about the only thing he seemed disappointed with. Anything else regarding decorating or the order of things he's just like "uh-huh" "sounds good" Lol. My FMIL, my mom, and I have really just been able to take over the wedding decorating and planning. He could care less, but he does participate by doing whatever duties we give him to do. So I guess I could just compromise on this one thing.

I'll just "accidentally" make the garter fall down to my ankle before it's showtime! Lol.

I have actually only seen a garter retrieved and tossed once in my life. It was about 10 years ago. The ring bearer caught the garter, because the men didn't want to go for it. Awkward ...

It's completely uncommon, in my family/social circle. I've only seen a couple of bouquets tossed, too.

Compromise. Have fun. Yeah it's tacky but so what. Me and my FH are doing the garter toss and that baby will be up on my upper thigh.

I don't think it's necessarily "weird" or "inappropriate" but I do get it that it makes you uncomfortable.

It might be kind of cutesy funny if he goes to get it and you stick your leg up and it's right there on your ankle? Lol that's the best compromise I've got right now.

I don't have any help. When I asked DF his thoughts on the garter toss, he scrunched up his face and said, "Why do I want to embarrass you and insinuate what we'll be doing later in front of all of our guests? Just no."

That was the end of the conversation. Yay! I hate the garter toss.

So much no. It personally makes my skin crawl.

@futuremalcolm same here.

Nope nope nope!

I'd say let him do it, it'll be over so quick and you guys will have a lifetime to remember that funny, awkward moment. Men don't ask for much during this time so I think that's a small gift to give to your FH!! Don't worry about what others think!

We had the toss garter in my husbands pocket so he went into for 2 seconds and came out quick with it and also with sunglasses that said Groom on them. His song was Danger Zone. He really wanted to it too so we compromised on short and sweet.

The awkwardness of it is what makes it fun. My brides are typically laughing so hard and so is everyone else. It does make for fun photos. If you embrace the awkwardness and know most people feel awkward during this it's not that bad. I have couples skip it too ... and it's not that big of deal. It's your wedding and really what's important to you and your fiance. I think the comment about having it at your ankle may be a funny compromise.

Nope. It makes my skin crawl too, but this is your skin.

I think you need to talk to your FH about this. SO much of wedding traditions stem from a woman being property and there are a lot of things I won't be doing because of that. While that is not necessarily the history of garters/fishing for them, it still proves the point that not all traditions should be followed if you don't want them to.

I can't believe some of the users that are telling to just do it anyways. This makes you uncomfortable. You can compromise on something else, but my FH would never push and continue to ask me to do something that would make me uncomfortable. Yours shouldn't either.

Let him and his groomsmen do a stupid dance or whatever else he wants, as long as both parties are comfortable.