"Fishing" for the Garter

Just asked FH lol. I think that's a no?

Thanks @ashmarnev!

I agree, if you're totally and utterly uncomfortable then don't do it. As far as the "focusing on your thighs" point, that didn't happen. You saw my shoes (see pic above) and a little calf. No higher. Depending on the size of your skirt, no one will even know where he actually is under there. I was in the dress and couldn't tell where he was unless he was touching me. I coached him to where it was and it was over in a jiffy. It wasn't awkward at all. You realize ppl will ask you about babies the day after you get married... that implies they know you have sex and do other adult things. He also isn't sticking his hand in your bra or panties in front of a room of people, so the handkerchief comment was a reach. Your husband will stick his head under your skirt and grab something placed fairly low on your leg. He's not groping you in public.

Again, if it makes you uncomfortable then don't do it. Honestly, I think its not as big of a deal as others have made it to be.

Lastly, it did not interrupt my dancing/talking/party. We had two rooms (one for dinner and the second for partying) and once we had dinner and did toasts, we moved to the party room and got all formalities out of the way. By 9 pm, we were dancing and never had a lull. Your timeline can be arranged so it doesn't interrupt the flow.

Not really I didnt say my hand was going into his underwear.... and his head looks is very close to your crotch btw. plus the garter is worn very high up your thigh so ya... not really a reach. And not everyone has 2 rooms or has their venue past 10pm...

It not my thing. Not try to insult you. I'm sorry if it came off that way?

There are levels of uncomfortableness. Find out which level this is for you: too much so it's a nope? Awkward but doable? Embrace the awkward and make it funny?

Figure it out and decide what you are comfortable with and talk with your FH. Marriage is compromise. Most likely your FH doesn't know or isn't aware of the tawdry history tied up with garters and implied ownership--he's just seen it done at other weddings and in movies all his life so he thought it was a given in a wedding reception.

Up to you and him. It's your wedding, we can only give you opinions.

Also...this is the most that anyone saw - certainly no head up the dress or anything like that for us.

No no no no no. And no.

FH is not about to defrock me to retrieve a trophy and toss it into a crowd of cheering men who can't wait to get their hands on my symbolic defrocking. Eff that noise.