Fiancé doesn't care about wedding planning

My FH keeps telling me "whatever you think is best" or "whatever you want" but sometimes its so frustrating because I really need some feedback.

My FH does not care about the wedding planning either. He always says you pick and I will show up. The only thing he cares about is the taste of the food/cake.

It's not that he doesn't care about the wedding.. it's that wedding planning and decorations are not his thing.

Yea, my FH could care less. He always says "whatever makes you happy." I gave him a few tasks he has to do in this planning journey but everything else Is all me and I'm ok with that haha.

My fiancé was really helpful with the venue. He actually looked them up himself and actually told me we should go visit the one we actually picked. He was real involved choosing our food and cake and in choosing a band over a DJ. But he doesn't give a crap about the flowers, decor, what the invites looked like etc. And now I feel like I'm in the stage that I'm thinking about all these little details and I'll ask him questions and he will say "i don't know whatever you think". I had to have a talk with him. I told him if I asked him then I want to hear what he thinks. I wouldn't bother asking him if all I wanted to hear was "whatever you think". He's doing a little better.

FH is thrilled that I am doing most of the planning so he can focus on his studies. We're both of the mindset that the marriage is much more important than the wedding and as long as the major things are agreed upon and taken care of we'll be good.

FH is the same way. He doesn't care as long as I am happy.

As far as the wedding and decorations and music and every thing goes I couldn't care less. The thing I am looking forward to at the wedding is being married to my FW. Everything else from my perspective is just fluff. My FW has been imagining her wedding for years so I tell her to do what will make her happy because as long as the day ends with us married and not spending a ton of money I will be happy. I am involved in the aspect that I am handling the money and the contracts but she makes the decisions.

You're not alone! Mine can barely remember our date LOL.

Mine has had a few opinions here and there and I'll show him stuff along the way, but he's totally hands off and trusting me to handle it. I'm suer type A personality, get shit done kind of person and he is the total opposite, so it works really well for me. He would slow me down otherwise

My DH was this way. He kinda let me plan and then I ran things by him/had him pick between two options. Honestly? It was SO much easier this way. My bff & MOH's FH is very picky and stubborn and she is dreading the entire planning process because of that!

Yes! Mine is the same and I try to narrow stuff down so he doesn't have to be part of the huge process of things. Usually works out better

My FH is similar, he lets me do as I please. I wish he were more excited and interested but he says that boys don't grow up dreaming about their wedding day and girls do, so he doesn't really have a preference and wants me to pick whatever. I have asked him to do certain things and he'll do them. Doesn't seem excited about it but he will do it.

One of the things someone had suggested to me regarding getting FH involved with planning was to have a "Wine Wedding Wednesday". That means you pick a day during the week, and your and your FH agree that on that day you guys will talk about wedding decisions. Add some wine, and maybe a favorite meal/treat, and make it the one time during the week you present your narrowed down options, and ask for his/her input. I think a lot of times people are overwhelmed with the amount of detail involved with planning, and don't know how to make such decisions so far in advance.

Try also not talking about the wedding constantly. Take breaks from talking about it so they are not annoyed!!

So far these strategies have helped a lot. Also, I've requested my FH to come to any appointments with me because I need his support and he agreed that he would do that. He went with me last week to meet a florist and he said himself, that he was glad he went because there is just something you can't know unless you were there to meet them yourself.

Hope that helps!

My FH does this too and it isn't that he doesn't necessarily care, he just isn't one to really get excited about the little details like colors and decor. He is just excited to get married. I usually just ask if he likes something or not and sometimes he might give input.

FH and I have weekly meetings I talk all wedding stuff. Early on I gave him the checklist and said which of these tasks interest you and asked him to be the lead on them. Some activities, like venue, are joint. So far, I'm happy.

ETA: just realized I totally agree with Riya R.

Narrow down the big ticket items he cares about- food- booze- music- venue- shit like that.

Steak was hard and fast issue. We HAD to have it.

fine. so we went to the tasting together and made the menu together.

The venue we looked at together- and he didn't care about anything else really. We have similar color tastes so that was easy- anything else I needed an opinion on - I researched- game up with 3 options and presented them and got his input and we went from there.

Don't over complicated it- and don't get bogged down in the process. no one really cares about those little details you can agonize over. Seriously. no one.

I was having the same problems and he was saying exactly what you were saying. but last weekend it really clicked with him that we were getting married. He helped address the save the dates and we picked out an "unity ceremony" type deal together. We talked about the invites and how they work. He admitted he doesn't realize the work that goes into planning. There is just some things he will never care about, decorations, flowers, and anything with the bridesmaids! lol, which is fine with me. I ask for input on bigger more important things, like the ceremony, first look, food, and dessert.

He will care, it may take a while, but he will.

I would work on communicating with him why you want his input and narrow down the options to two or three things.

My FH was abnormally involved in our planning but I've had several friends in your shoes and they had to work on understanding what truly mattered to their FH could differ from them.

My FH was like that at first. The closer it gets and there are things for him to do such as when it's time for him to do stuff with the guys like ordering Tuxedos, then he may become more involved. Don't let it get you down. He just wants to marry you! You'll be fine!

My FH is similar and lets me handle most of the planning (which I don't mind at all). Whenever I need his opinion on say music, cake flavors, photos he definitely wants taken of us, I give him options and have him help me. This way the big decisions he has a part in, but also knows that the little details I have locked in

FH is the same because if it were up to him, we'd be doing a JOP and calling it a day. He gets that my family is super important to me and that I want to share it with them, which is why we're doing the whole shebang.

His only request so far is that he be allowed to wear whatever shoes he wants, which I'm fine with as I'll be rocking out dolled-up sneakers under my dress.