Feeding only wedding attendees or everyone at reception?

I think you should feed everybody. Unless you aren't inviting some people to the ceremony and have separate invitations for those people that indicate they are invited to a cocktail reception only (so they know they won't be fed).

I just want to make sure I understand this right...you have some people invited to both reception and ceremony and some only invited to the reception and you are wondering if you should feel all or those only invited to both? If that is right, then my answer is definitely to feed them both. I would think it is rather odd to have some guests not allowed to eat and others are. Are you having a plated dinner? How would people even be able to tell who is supposed to eat and who isn't?

**feed all** not feel

Also if you are inviting some people to the reception only make sure you have the time they are supposed to show up AFTER the dinner will be completely over and cleaned up.

I have been to some weddings where they invited everyone to the Ceremony, but only close family and friends to the reception. Only feeding those they invited to the reception. I was actually debating whether to do this for my wedding as well. Small budgets accomodate this well an I see no problem with this as long as your up front about there being a specific guestlist for the reception.

I am having two seperate invites and only having the bridal party and close family at the supper and then a cocktail reception with finger foods and a dessert table for the rest of my guests, I couldn't have everyone be fed or my budget would be through the roof! And I know alot of times people will go and eat between the ceremony and reception so I am not too worried about it.

If I were invited to a wedding and found out later I wasn't invited for dinner, but some people were good enough to be fed, I would take my gift, leave, and tell just about everyone I knew. I don't know if that's a cultural thing or not, but that's just not done here.

We were planning on serving pasta buffet style. Our reception hall of choice has a full kitchen to make it easy for cooking and serving. Right now plans are to have a 3pm wedding, pictures afterwards. 5pm dinner, and then reception at 7pm. And yes, we are having two different wedding invitations for wedding/reception and for reception only. All of your responses are helpful thus far, and are much appreciated!

Ditto Wow. I would be beyond offended if I was among the group that you chose not to feed. I can't even imagine how this would be acceptable anytime / anywhere. Feed everyone. And unless you are having a very small ceremony (i.e. only family), I'm of the opinion that everyone should be invited to both events.

I'm gonna have to agree with T.F and Wowjunkie-- I don't know if you are having it catered or not (doesn't sound like it b/c of your description of the kitchen)... but pasta is pretty cheap. If you're just doing a pasta bar then you may as well have everyone eat. Spending $30 for pasta that will feed at least an extra 60 people is worth not offending family/friends

We considered doing something like this I think...

We were going to have a big wedding so all of our college friends could come, a closed dinner for only out of town guests and family immediatly following and then an open cocktail hour after dinner/dance party so we would have only been feeding about half as many but my mom decided just to scrap that idea and everyone will eat... it will be less expensive food and we are DIY (BBQ something Chicken probably) and it will be a buffett but the food doesnt matter to me.. I just want everyone there

I think when people travel (&dollar and bring a gift (more &dollar to your wedding, you should probaly feed them. I would then some people would be upset that they traveled and bought gifts attened the wedding and then don't get to the reception to haev a meal, see the toasts and what not that usually happend during dinner and shortly after..

I would be so P!$$ed if i when to your reception and didn't get to eat with everyone else and then heared that i didn't get to eat because I wasn't invited to the ceremony! These people are going there to celebrate your big day, most having spent WAY more than your plate of food would cost on a gift.

My first marriage, we had additional people we invited to the reception only. It's tradition over there to have a sit down dinner for the everyone invited to the ceremony and then at the reception have a separate buffet a little later (this way the people who didn't attend the ceremony/sit down dinner can eat as well). I'd say you have to feed them one way or the other.

NO question abouat it: I would definetly feed everyone!

I would feed everyone, but if you're choosing not to, I agree that you should have the invite for the reception only's wayy after the dinner is over so that they dont really realize they missed it. Otherwise if they come while other people are eating, it can be awkward

I don't think I understand. I've heard of inviting everyone the ceremony and cutting costs by only inviting some to the reception.. but why would you not invite everyone to the ceremony if you're inviting everyone to the reception? The ceremony is the cheap part!

Anywho.. definitely feed everyone. Beyond rude to feed some but not others!

Why would you invite people to the reception where food is being served and then not feed them?

I think it's wrong to only feed some and not other even if they will come later and even if you are on a budget. Pretty much everyone is on a budget and if you can't afford to feed ever one than do 1 of 2 things either 1 Cut your guest list down because Apparently you can't afford a big wedding like you want (neither can I and that's why my guest list is under 100 people) or 2 change the menu change the type of meal your having. I don't mean to come off rude but to me it's like your saying hey your not invited to my ceremony and your invited to my reception but the one that starts later when everyone else is feed and by the way don't forget to bring a present. Even if your not asking for presents people know it's rude to show up to any party (birthday, baby shower, weddings) with out a gift. That's just my take on it.

What we are thinking of doing is have everyone invited to the ceremony and the reception but the reception will be a light meal (mostly finger foods, salad and stuff) and later that night, after everyone leaves, we will get only family members and those really close to go us go out to a sit down dinner where we are going to have a nice meal. I think you should at least provide finger foods for everyone at the reception.