Do you and/or your fiancé have children?

I have a 9 year old daughter. She was my junior bride, she lit the unity candle with us.... and that's about it. I didn't want him saying marriage vows to her... that's weird to me.

Lighting the candle together is a great idea. It's not really a marriage vow that I want to say to her. This is what I had in mind: “(name), I promise to accept and love you as my own child and to protect and love you all of my life. I promise to do my best to guide and support you - and to respect you enough to allow you to see the world through your own eyes.” Something like that anyways. It was actually our JPs idea. I think it's nice. Does anyone else think this is weird? Now I'm worried haha

I have three daughters they are my BM's and he has two sons who are his GM's. My girls know he is committed to all of us so nothing in the ceremony specifically for them.

A good friend of mine did a vow to her step daughter.

FH & I have a daughter together so she's the flower girl and standing up there with us

My FH and I have 4 kids together from previous marriage. They are included in our wedding as flower girl and ring bearer but we are not including them in the vows or sand ceremony.

I have two daughters. My oldest turned 7 two weeks ago and my youngest is 5.5.

My engagement ring is 3 stones to show his commitment to me and the girls. They know the significance of it. He gave them each a gift at the RD, and while they were both in the wedding we didn't have a special ceremony or anything.

I will say, my SIL and her stepson said something similar to what you're planning on doing. I remember the officiant asking her if she was prepared to love him and raise him as her own. My nephew was asked if he would respect and cherish her role in his life. Something like that. It was very touching and I thought it was a nice inclusion. It was quick. Short and simple is very important.

Ultimately, adults having a strong marriage will benefit the kids so I wouldn't do anything or too much that detracts away from the fact that his is marriage ceremony between you and FH. KWIM?

@we'llalwayshaveparis that's SUPER sweet. What a sweetheart he is.

^ Thanks! He definitely is.

I have a 12 year old (he is giving me away) and my FH has two stepkids from his first marriage who he raised and they still call him Dad. They were 2 & 4 when he started dating their mom.

We are including our kids in the sand ceremony.

If he suggested it, and you are comfortable with it, the only thing I would check is the ex. Would her Mom object to it? I don't know what sort of relationship they have. As a Mom, if my husband and I were to split, I would want his future gf/wife to care about/be kind to her. At the same time, I have this whole, "I'm the only MOMMA!!" screaming in my head.

I have a 4 year old daughter from a previous relationship. We are incorporating her into the sand ceremony and having it signify the blending of our family.

I have a daughter and he has a son. They are the ring bearer and flower girl. They will also pour sand during the sand ceremony. I don't want him saying vows to her, she is 4 and has no idea what he will be talking about anyway. After the wedding, he plans to adopt her so I think that about covers any doubts or concerns she may have later in life.

FH has a son and a daughter (10 and 7) from a previous relationship. The ex is crazy and the kids are (most likely) not going to be allowed to come to the wedding. If they are, they will stand up with FH and we will be doing a Unity Cord. It breaks my heart to think that they won't be there for FH but there isn't much we can do right now.

No...thank god

FH has 1 daughter who is 4 and she will be the flower girl, we are now expecting our 1st one together

My fiancé has two children- a 19 year old son and a 17 year old daughter. She is my Maid of Honor and he is his Best Man. I also have a 5 year old son who will be the ring bearer. We are also including all 3 of our children in the sand ceremony.

I have a daughter who is 7. She adores my FH. He gave her her own wedding ring. She will be a flower girl. We are not doing anything special with her during the ceremony because this is a wedding. FH has already committed to being in her life and raising her. She also said she didn't want to do anything. she can be shy sometimes.

We were planning on a sand ceremony but with all the tension going on right now in the house I may rethink this although it has already been written into our ceremony time I know my 3 children want to do this badly I just don't know how his "kids" feeel about it anymore since our fall out last week, we will readdress all of it once we have had time to re-evaluate the situation I think it would e weird to include just my children and either neither of his or just the 17 yo?

THe joys of blended families and punk a$$ kids!