Diy: Wedding Planning

I am planning everything myself, and I am absolutely loving the process! I had considered hiring a wedding planner, but I am way too picky and OCD about everything. Plus, I am very organized and love planning events, so I felt like handing everything over to a planner would have taken away half the joy and excitement from me.

The decision to hire a planner is totally up to you! I booked a day of coordinator, but am doing all the planning on my own with my fiance. For the most part, we have loved it!! If you're someone who loves to plan out details and do everything yourself, then skip the wedding planner. If you get stressed out easily or don't know which direction to go or don't like planning, then maybe reach out to a wedding planner. Also, some wedding planners have a package that consists of just one phone call or meeting with them, where you can bounce ideas off of them and talk about your wedding vision, and that's it. They give you a good start on your planning and point you in the right direction, but you ultimately do the rest of the planning yourself. If that's something of interest to you, contact local wedding planners to see if that's something they offer. If you choose to do the planning yourself, look into using a checklist (both WeddingWire and The Knot have good ones), and that will help keep your planning on track. Congratulations on your engagement, and happy wedding planning!

I'm planning my own wedding too! It's a lot of fun, but it can also be super stressful.

One thing I recommend it don't get too attached to any particular idea unless you are 100% in on it. I originally thought I wanted our venue to be at this local glass factory, so I planned almost everything around to this location, from hotels accommodation nearby to which caterers the venue worked with. I got super too attached to this place.

However, when we toured the venue, my fiance and I realized there would be a ton of issues that wouldn't work for us at all. I cried for three days after that because I felt like weeks worth of research was wasted.

We have a venue now that we absolutely adore and it checks all of our boxes. I do regret how much heartache I put myself under because I got too excited over an idea that didn't have much weight to it.

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I am SO glad you said this. We have already seen one venue and we are looking at 2 more on Sunday and I always get like this. I get so attached to one and start planning catering and telling everybody about it and I need to stop!! Thank you for telling me this, I am not alone but I need to be more careful about that!! I think the only thing I won't change is the colors and style/theme right now other than that I will have to be more open minded about the venues like you said

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Thank you so so much for your comment. I am noticing I am really enjoying it but I like to get things done quickly, considering we got engaged on Christmas Eve and our wedding date is set for late March in 2023, I want to be ahead of the game. I guess you can say i'm a little impatient. Yes I have noticed that The Knot and Wedding Wire especially have been very helpful in things like that. I have every little detail down, even to what songs I want played at what times. I appreciate it, thank you so much for all your helpful words!! Congratulations on your wedding!

View Quoted Comment I will also add on, don’t start buying your decor too early! It is one of the most exciting parts of planning because it is something tangible you can see and touch. However, I got wrapped up in the excitement and purchased over $1,000 in decor right away… and now we won’t be using hardly any of it! You just never know what is going to pop up unexpectedly, or when you will have a change of heart on your vision. I would say wait until 6 months before the wedding to start buying items.

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I am soooo OCD too!! Like even the playlist of the whole wedding and songs I want played while guests are waiting and songs I want played after everything settles down and everything. You do make a good point also because I am very particular on what I want so I might be disappointed if I give it over to someone else and they don't fulfill my expectations. It's nice to know i'm not alone!! Thank you

View Quoted Comment No problem Autumn! I experienced a lot of the same excitement you feel when I first got engaged, especially when talking to family and friends about wedding planning. When they would ask me questions, I always felt like I had to give them a detailed plan immediately. It’s totally ok not to know everything yet, especially since you are recently engaged.
I hope you enjoy your venue tours later this week! 😊

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Cece!! I am so glad you told me that now because I've already started buying it and we don't even have a venue yet!! I know it sounds crazy but in my head I have it mapped out of what decor I want and where but I guess you're right. It's definitely exciting because it is something you can touch and make you feel like it's coming closer. I can already tell i'm getting a little decor crazy so with you making this point I may want to reel it in a little bit at least Thank you so much for mentioning this!!!!

The very first thing you need to do is set a budget, then book a venue. You don't have a date until it's locked in with a venue.

Congratulations Autumn. Happy planning, you have gotten some really great advice. It is easy to get up up in the details and wanting everything to be perfect but remember at the end of the day the most important thing is you ll be marrying your love. Ask for help when you need it and be flexible, planning anything during covid can be intense. Have fun and enjoy this sweet time!

I agree with what others have said. The most important thing is to book the venue. We ending up changing our date to what they had available. For me it is the worst part of planning and it makes the budget part more real too.

Depending on your venue too you will have a better idea of what else you need to do.

For me my venue does the food, DJ, Lighting, complete table decorations including center pieces if we want to use them or bring our own. I am going to use theirs for half my tables and make my own for the other half just to help out and cut back on what I have to do.

They also gave me a list of things they don't include that I will need that I don't think I would have thought of on my own.

Hello so I am a Covid bride and I did not have a coordinator to begin with a year prior she did say that I got so much work done that I only needed day of coordination. But can I just say it’s the best things I have chosen out of all the extras. It has taken 10 times the stress off of me. She helps me think of things I would forget or didn’t even think of. And definitely help keep me on a time line. I am very A type but with my wedding being a destination there was a lot I was needing help with on the island I didn’t realize

We are doing everything ourselves. However my situation is different because my mother is ordained and does weddings every weekend. So she is running my rehearsal. We have looked into getting a day of coordinator for the wedding but decided against it because it is only family and friends theirs 80 in total. I would recommend getting your venue booked as soon as you can and then follow suit with everything else as soon as you can. Getting everything out of the way is best for the important things. As well as we have been doing as many things now as we can and paying off bills as we can so that we can not have to worry about things until the last second. We have been getting everything organized and ready so that it can be a ready go set up that day. I have found that doing fake flowers has been a great addition to the planning because it is one less thing to have to worry about whether they show or not. Another thing that has really helped with stress is just simply expecting things are gonna go wrong and its not gonna be perfect and its just our families we do not have to make everything perfect we just have to be happy with our day for ourselves. Because guest list has become the hugest issue right now because everyone wants people there and our parents want their friends there. Which is not possible with the small wedding feel. I would also try to think about things when your planning about a rain plan as well as a covid plan in case things change from now til then HAPPY PLANNING and CONGRATS!!!! do these things with your SO and make it a great bonding experience

I agree with everyone - start with the venue and then everything will fall into place. I probably contacted 20 venues for pricing and dates, and we physically went and saw 9 before picking the one we liked the most that fit with our budget. Once we picked our venue, everything else has come together quickly. A lot of venues (mine did!) will have a preferred vendor's list. You aren't required to use them, but the bonus is they've worked there before and know the set up much better than you do. After looking at way too many photographers and DJs and bakeries etc, I ended up going with ones from the preferred vendor's list (helped that they were also on here and had amazing reviews!). The ones that I talked to all knew my venue well and had some tips and tricks.

I am not using a planner (my coworker just got married last August and I swear his planner caused more problems than solved them!) and my amazing MC actually functions as a day of coordinator for my reception (My venue provides for the ceremony) and it has made everything easier. Focus on the venue. Get that settled (and don't feel as though you have to stretch your budget too much! I fell in love with a couple of venues but they were out of my budget and I just had to keep reminding myself, it's one day. The wedding is great, the marriage is the big thing, don't start off your marriage in massive debt for a fun day) and then you'll be able to really start planning and visualizing!

We have a 2year engagement and its all DIY my maid of honor and me. My tip is get money envelopes and price out what ur gonna need for the dress, invites, food, flowers, lighting, even the honeymoon. Plan everything out as far as you can go. I bought my dress on sale and had it for over a year now. We are gettting married in October 2022 and we only have 3,500 left on everything. The relief of having everything payed off before the wedding has been a lifesaver.

I booked a day of. I will say planning myself has been stressful but I’m an easily stressed person. Take it step by step. Figure out your venue and time of year. Create a notebook to jot down ideas. When you start booking vendors create a binder and print out all of your contracts. Definitely send out a lot of emails. And don’t book anyone without at least a phone call or zoom chat. I ended up not hiring some people I planned on because after talking with them on the phone we didn’t really vibe together. Figure out your budget and then decide what vendors are the most important for you to spend money on so you can decide how much of your budget you can dedicate towards that. For instance we picked a cheaper venue and caterer because we’re spending $10,500 on photography and videography but those two things were the most important for us. And if at any point you get overwhelmed remember it’s okay to take a break to breathe

I got engaged October 2021 and am getting married February 2023. I sort of had my heart set on a venue before I was even engaged or thought about getting married; I had stumbled across it online and thought if I ever get married I want to get married there! So it was the only place we looked at! I didn’t go with their all Inclusive package because then it was tied to all of their chosen vendors. This way, I could use Who I want , except the caterer had to be from their proposed vendors list. I did hire a DOC but she is really a month of, as we start meeting with her 3 months out. I have been able to get all of the vendors i want except the florist! Just found out yesterday she is booked for my day and I’m so bummed. All I want for centerpieces is candles and lanterns and some greenery and I made the mistake of thinking rental places did these but everyone says it is the florist. So my one problem is managing to get all the stuff I want form one vendor as each seems to have a minimum amount to spend. (Like 2 or 3k!) so I can’t do Both a floral designer AND a rental place I have to try to get everything I need from one. This is where a full planner would have come in handy.

Same here and mine is in 24 days x_x...

my advice if you are DIYing is START EARLY. I started by making a powerpoint with everything (NERD) so I knew how i wanted everything to LOOK

Then I started making decorations like 8 months before. It spreads out the labor and the money so you aren't dropping huge sums of cash and spending hours of sleepless nights trying to do everything last minute.

Think someone mentioned this but don't go too far off the deep end in planning until you have a venue. This was the most stressful part for me and it will determine what you need in terms of decor to fill the space

Keep spreadsheets of your budget and what you're spending.

Sign up for coupons and sale emails at a Joanne's or a Michaels (Joanne's is way better if you have one close by you)

If you have to supply your own linens/plates/etc, search wholesale website (tableclothefactory.com/webstaurantstore.com)

Look up crafty stuff on Pinterest, a lot of nice decorations can be done repurposing dollar store items

Best of luck and congrats

Hi Autumn,

I am right there with you. I am planning super early because I want to secure my venues and vendors early especially with inflation. It shocked me when a florist had to turn me down because they were booking my date.

Hopefully I don't bore you with the advice I give. I used to be a bridal stylist, and have done most of my wedding planning, but I am now handing the reins over to my wedding coordinator.

Be realistic with budget and time.

-Before you plan anything, talk to your fiancé and have a list of "non-negotiables" if your wedding was reduced to the bare essentials. Then have a list of, "Nice-to-haves" tier 1, 2, 3...
This will help you stay focused.

My Opinion: Two absolute non-negotiables are religion (if you observe) and a photographer. If you have to splurge in one area only, pay top dollar to have your day documented the right way.

-A lot of $$$ goes to waste if you don't have a clear idea of what you are doing. The last thing you want is a bunch of money wasted on supplies or unnecessary items. It can be easier to hire professionals for the services.

-A wedding coordinator is invaluable, and they can have discounts with certain vendors and services. Some may have leftover items from other weddings that you can use. A wedding coordinator/planner will already have plenty of ideas from other weddings saving you time on details like table layouts and decor.

Note: Consider having the final RSVPs either routed by mail to your coordinator, on your wedding website, or both.

Caution: The prices of day-of coordination are usually anywhere from $1200-$3000. Make sure that they cover the hours you need, if they do pickups/ tear-downs, and other services you require.

Create a few "Master Sheets" for you and your coordinator

-Vendor Names, Contact Information, Addresses, Times to Contact, Booking Fees, and Payment Timelines.

-Guest Names, Addresses, Contact Information, relation to you, and any issues (medical, mobility, family drama) to not blind sight anyone. This will come in handy for seating charts too.