When I first became engaged I offered each of my parents (who are divorced) a plus one if they wanted it. Both individually and then as a unit informed me that they did not need/want a plus one. I thought this was mature of them and a better idea than my plus one offer.
Fast forward almost a year later (and about 2 months from the wedding) and my Dad casually says, "By the way, my girlfriend is coming to the wedding." I was so taken aback that I foolishly said "OK" before thinking things through. Then I felt I had to give my mom a heads-up, which I did and she was very upset. She and my Dad had made an agreement to make the wedding day about me and my fiancé and not about themselves and their dates, so she felt he had gone back on his word, but my Mom still refused the plus one I offered to her again. I told her that I honestly didn't know what to do and felt awkward about the whole thing (I should have nipped it in the bud, you know). Plus, when I reminded my Dad of his agreement with my Mom he claims no memory of the agreement.
At our wedding there's going to be a "parents table" with the grandparents and both sets of parents. My Mom is adamant that my Dad's girlfriend not be seated with them because his girlfriend is obviously not a parent. Now I like my Dad's girlfriend but at this point it seems overly tense and difficult if she comes. My fiancé, his parents, and my Mom all vote NO GIRLFRIEND, and I'm afraid I agree. But I'm not sure what the right thing is here.
My fiancé and I intend to talk to my Dad and his girlfriend tonight but I'm worried there's going to be a huge freak out (my Dad doesn't like being told NO and I've already had two other family members completely flip out at me regarding the guest list). But I have to say something. The wedding is soon and we can't go over our limits regarding guests.
Advice please!
