Dilemma: inviting the former big crush

I would tell him if you are uncomfortable.

If you are not okay with it you should let him know.

I don't see any need for her to come. Leave the past in the past.

It's a no from me. I wouldn't be comfortable with that.

If you haven't been introduced and the two of you become friends by now, then I would say no.

If you feel weird about it, just tell him.

I'd be really uncomfortable with that too. Talk to him about it and let him know how you feel.

You should talk to him & express how you feel. It doesn't sound like there great friends so she has absolutely no purpose there.

@nikki and all so far... That's it in a nutshell! He and I don't do much talking to any exs and dropped any who were friends bc it was just not needed anymore and it was awkward as we start our life together. This one girl is weird bc they never dated, and were best friends in high school, and he feels like it would be weird to not invite her bc maybe she didn't know how in love with her he was. I wish I'd met her somewhere else bc our wedding day doesn't seem like the right place. Reading all your posts already is helping me realize that I'm more than uncomfortable, I don't really want her there. And I wish he had thought about my feelings a little more. But that's prolly my fault bc I was open to it at first, and now I just have to admit that my feelings are changing.

What Nikki said. That shit would NOT fly in my household.

If you are uncomfortable tell him.

I would tell him you're uncomfortable and don't want her there. If he doesn't understand why, ask him how he would feel if you invited the guy you had a crush on your whole life who now texts you when he's lonely. He might just not realize how it sounds to you until you tell him.

It's your wedding day and you shouldn't have to worry about some woman you've never met who isn't a significant person in FH's life being there and making you uncomfortable!

Yeah that would be a hard no for me. You've never met her, you know of his past feelings for her and they are still in communication with each other. That part would bother me as well. I would talk to him about it and, me personally, I would address the communicating with each other "when she's lonely and they go down memory lane?" That just seems really strange to me.

Nope nope nope. You should be 100% comfortable and happy on your wedding day and you don't want this one person to ruin that for you. Also, she doesn't seem that important so I don't get why she'd even be invited in the first place. Seems weird.

Are you actually friends with this person?? Only close friends should be invited.

I definitely wouldn't invite her if I were in your shoes. Let him know how it makes you feel. He's marrying you and he needs to respect your feelings. Don't invite anyone to your wedding that would make either of you feel uncomfortable. That's the worse way to start the first day of happily ever after.

I do agree with FutureMrsCohen. "When she's lonely and they go down memory lane" does not sound okay to me. I know it's getting close to the big day, but I'd also ask him how he really feels about her.

I'm going to agree with everyone and say it's definitely a heck no from me. I don't think I would want the woman my husband always wanted to be around him/us on my wedding day (or in general). Not because I'm insecure but because it's just kind of awkward. All it would take is a little giggle and a "remember when we...." And I would jump over the table at my own wedding and pounce on her. lol in all seriousness though, it seems a little sketchy that he even thought to invite her and I would let him know it's not okay with me... That relationship should've ended a long time ago.

ETA: Can't spell

I give this one a hard pass. It doesn't sound like having her there is a must for him and you shouldn't have to worry about feeling uncomfortable. Speak up about how you feel and hopefully he understands

Just say no. And have him take a better look at his guest list. Weddings aren't for just anyone who you've ever spent time with.

You said: "and he feels like it would be weird to not invite her bc maybe she didn't know how in love with her he was" WHAT?? IDK, I'd be wondering, "is he still?" and "what if she were to find out?"

Not only would I insist she NOT be invited, but I'd have a long talk with him and find out if this torch he has carried is truly extinguished. I'd be pissed, honestly, and I'd feel like the runner up to the "one that got away." He is being horrible to you in A) he even thought to invite her, and B) He told you all this.