Close friends who aren’t bridesmaids/groomsmen

We had close friends be readers, gift bearers during the Mass (ceremony), and then also had some be “ushers” where they passed out programs. We got them boutonnières and corsages as it is custom, but also is a way to show that they were special to us. I know you said your ceremony won’t have readers. Are you guys printing programs and your friends could be “ushers” and pass those out? Or lead certain family members to seats? If you would prefer they not have to perform something, maybe just bestow them with corsages and boutonnières on the day just as a way to say “you mean a lot to us!”

Personally I d just have them be guests, before the wedding maybe you can have a fun friend hang and tell them how much their friendship and support means to you. I may be misunderstanding but it sound like you have picked your bridal party and then want to choose another group of friends to honor, would there be friends that don't make either group I don't know but seems like that could lead to hurt feelings. Since it seems like there are no other roles that need to be filled (readers, ushers, etc) if you do not want to expand your bridal party I d just let it to be. Good luck!

I agree with Rosebud! I did not ask my FSIL to be in the wedding for various reasons, but we have a great relationship and I love her to pieces! I will not be asking her to do anything, because to some people, that's the best honor/gift you can offer.

I was not in one of my bridesmaids wedding, and did not take it offensively or wonder why she didn't pick me. I did, however, enjoy the hell out of her wedding lol

If you aren't planning to expand the bridal party and don't have an actual role to give someone, I'd just have them attend as guests. From the outside looking in, having "guests of honor" comes off as having friendship "tiers" or ranking your friendships as more or less important (or not important at all if someone doesn't make either cut), and it will likely lead to hurt feelings and/ or judge-y reactions.

You said having readers isn't common in your circles, but would it be impossible to have them anyways? Outside of religious ceremonies (which, to my knowledge, include readers anyways), you can sort of make your own rules on how the ceremony goes so long as you still meet whatever legal requirements to be married.

Other ideas would be asking someone to sing or play music, serve as an usher, pass out programs, or emcee.

Instead of trying to find roles for everyone, you could always host a friends lunch or a bridal brunch to show your appreciation for them! It'd be way cheaper than a weekend away, and would still be a good way to include them in the wedding celebration without having to find a role for each person.

I've been having a hard time with these questions as well. My FW and I have a best friend; we all went to college together and she's actually the one who introduced us. We talk on the phone with this girl daily. The bridal party is siblings only, though. We employed that rule to avoid a big bridal party.

Our best friend is kind of unofficially included? She's going to help me make things for the wedding events, because we're both artsy, and I might have her placecard say Matchmaker instead of her name.

That's a bit different than labeling her a guest of honor, I guess, but I agree with those above who said the "guest of honor" practice risks creating friendship tiers. I can see how that could hurt some feelings. I do like Paige's idea of asking people to sing, perform, or emcee. Or, think of religious customs/rites you could use. My FW and I have to choose two non-relatives to sign our ketubah (marriage contract), so that's one way we'll end up honoring close friends.

I just invited them as guests, and we each had one best friend give a speech. If we had put them as bridesmaids/groomsmen, I would have had like a dozen people while my husband would only have 3 or 4. That's very uneven and a lot of extra hassle to have a large wedding party.